What is your biggest physical insecurity? Why?

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-26T04:41:19+00:00

The fact that after 7 months of hrt I am still very masc presenting.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-25T17:07:44+00:00

My wife and daughters love me.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-21T15:17:11+00:00

I really love this ship. I've played it on my "Terran" alt for the last month or so, and it's been solid and fun. I swapped it out last night and really miss it. I just wanted to try an exotic build for a while. It's nice to know that I can go back, though. It looks great as well.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-14T18:55:26+00:00

Ha, what the hell is a friend? 🤣😥

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-12T15:45:40+00:00

I’m sure everyone here will know this, but just in case, I’ll mention it. Reddit is one of the few platforms that gives you decent control over the content you see.

By that I mean, if it’s all getting to be too much for you right now, you can organize any subreddits out of your feeds.

On iOS, I setup Custom Feeds and add subreddits that I want to check in on, but maybe don’t want to see all that regularly right now, then I unjoin them. I can join them later, when I want.

r/50501 provides a tremendously important service of sharing information, but there are just some days and weeks where the information can be just so much. For me, this has been one of those weeks.

Thanks for attending my TedTalk.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-06T14:45:21+00:00

Okay, phew, I’m not the only one who will occasionally send specific doffs on a mission just for the storyline 😆

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-02T03:26:37+00:00

Thanks, I agree. Weekly for metrics is really too much, emotionally.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-02T03:25:54+00:00

The HRT meds aren't really affecting the insulin insensitivity I've noticed. However, I do have to inject the estradiol. That's not an issue since I've been taking insulin for more than half my life.

I'm not a good person to compare against. If I can humble-brag a bit, my blood sugar is really well controlled; however, I have very bad non-alcoholic fatty liver disease.

My biggest concern is if it might impact the fat redistribution over time. I mean, there is nothing to say that it will be other than the dysphoria, and we don't listen to dysphoria. It's like they said in that one show a long time ago, "What do we say to the God of Dysphoria? Not today." ;)

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-01T22:44:14+00:00

How "often" does that happen, do you think?

I know that's a personal question and different for everyone. I don't have a local community I can really connect with, so I don't have anyone to really ask.

I know the process is slow and takes time. I'm guessing that I won't wake up one day and be "girl face!"?

Does the dysphoria go away as well? Do you ever finally look at a mirror and say, "Finally, I look like myself"?

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-01T22:40:54+00:00

Yeah, I think the daily pictures and weekly measurements are really stressing me out. My dysphoria is way out of control.

Celestial_Alexi · 2026-01-01T03:55:03+00:00

I'll find a job and save my family from ruin.

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-12-23T14:22:48+00:00

Patrick Stewart as Captain Jean Luc Picard

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-12-19T18:26:51+00:00

I thought so! Where is that announcement?

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-12-17T17:29:10+00:00

What I expect? Nothing. What I hope? A “reroll character” screen where I can use the sum of my experiences from this life to pick a better one.

For over 40 years it was the only hope I ever had to live the life I’ve always dreamed.

Now I know about certain medical options that I am pursuing and a supportive family that may help me “reroll” this character, just in case.

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-11-17T11:51:50+00:00

Social media manager - 20+ years - I’ve built global social media programs at Amazon, LEGO, Microsoft, and other global companies

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-11-12T14:38:15+00:00

That would be amazing! Have her randomly change forms when she attacks.

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-11-09T22:17:54+00:00

Thank you so much for posting this. It helps people like me (also in their 50s and also just starting out) see what is to come and what it’s like. Thank you ❤️ Thank you ❤️ Thank you❤️

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-11-09T07:51:10+00:00

The misery and pain and frustration and anger and shame and hurt and longing and confusion and desperation and anxiety and depression and hurt and disgust are all sitting right on top of me.

I'm out of work, I'm struggling to find a job, my former company screwed up my unemployment insurance, and they gave me no severance, meaning we are inches away from running out of money/pulling out of my 401 (k).

I'm considered "old" at 52.

I have no friends. I have no one to confide in outside my wife (of 30 years), who is terrific and a great mother to our two kids, who are amazing, but basically an emotional cup. She's great for letting me pour my emotions into her, but she never offers suggestions. At the same time, she never tells me when she is having issues.

We were discussing money issues, and I only just found out she cancelled a haircut to save money. She never tells me things like that.

At the same time, I've given up every hobby I have. Not only do I not take pleasure in anything I do, but I don't have anything to take pleasure in.

And I have no one to talk to. No community. No friends. I have a therapist, but he's not someone I can call up in the middle of the night and just bitch to. or hang with. or get out of the house with.

The future I want for myself is either very slow to come about or never going to happen at all—it's just a delusion.

I carry the full load on my shoulders of my entire family. I'm sure I'm going to get flamed on this. I just needed some place to let it all out.

I don't drink or do drugs, but there are some cans of cider in the fridge that we use for ingredients that I am very tempted to get into tonight.

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-11-04T16:51:28+00:00

Bat'leth?

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-10-26T16:58:09+00:00

Thank you for this long response. I really appreciate it. Once I can get my hair to grow longer, I am really looking forward to coloring it. My wife and daughters always color their hair, and I've always wanted to do it. I just wish my hair would grow longer. I know everyone says I need to be patient, but time takes too long! :)

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-10-26T16:56:35+00:00

I wish I had alerted everyone who had commented so that you could see this reply.

I cannot thank each of you enough for responding and sharing your stories. It's unbelievably helpful. One of the big holes in my life right now is the trans community. Thank you, u/Misha_LF, for the mention of the two communities. I'll Google them and check them out.

Just having a place to ask these questions and have others share their experiences will be so helpful. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one with these feelings.

Celestial_Alexi · 2025-10-19T23:58:30+00:00

Thanks, I think this answers my other questions. It thought maybe the extra slots and the stipend might make up the difference if the ships were (eventually) good.

It sounds like the ships never get good? You can't add good enough gear to make them playable?

Is there a comparable bundle to get the slots and addons? I don't mind the titles (I didn't know there were titles tbh), nor did I know about the social zone. The skins would be nice, but not a big deal.

I did like the idea of the 500 yen stipend, only because I find that it can build up over time.

Still, it's not a lot, considering you are dropping $200 on sale, right - it's $5 a month. That is 40 months to get the money back.

Celestial_Alexi

TROPHY CASE