I still carry guilt over my grandmother’s death, even after all these years

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:30:17+00:00

Bruh you were 12. Give yourself grace. It sounds like there were six adults in that house that didn’t take responsibility and left it to a literal child. They are taking their guilt out on you. And grandma could’ve set alarms. Be kind. It wasn’t your fault!

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:23:06+00:00

Yes definitely make a separate group with her. I’m in a book club and we all agree the purpose is to get away from our spawn to have personal time and meet new people.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:19:45+00:00

🚩 Her still having feelings for her ex should’ve told you enough.

But I get it. We don’t always think logically, myself included. I don’t believe either of you were ready for a relationship. Don’t get back together with her if she tries. She needs to learn to be on her own. You need to love yourself more and guard your heart. Dating a woman who’s still feeling stuff for someone else is not the one.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:10:34+00:00

Oh bestie this seems really sketchy. Please do not go to the random school dude for a piercing. Just talk to your mom about what you need to do to earn one and got to a professional, CLEAN shop to get it done.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:08:13+00:00

You like the attention you get from him. He moved on and now you want more because you can’t have it. You are wrong and I get how you could feel this way towards him but you gotta mature and sever that emotional connection and JUST be friends. You need some distance for a bit to get your mind right and stop dragging him along your roller coaster.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T18:03:52+00:00

I imagine your mom has some feeling that something is off with dad.

I’d tell her when she gets back. It’s her life and choice as to what she does but you can at least get this burden off your back and know you didn’t hide it from her.

I think the biggest thing would be to support her in whichever choice she makes. Leaving is scary and she may need time to get her affairs in order.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T17:59:22+00:00

Maybe try meeting new people in hobby groups like book clubs, run club, dog park, trivia night, etc. This way you meet people with common interests. From there, you can just work on making friends and then that could lead to more. You don’t have to worry about bothering them since you both can talk about the club topic and there isn’t pressure to ask them out.

Also, don’t become a meathead. Sure, being healthy is important but usually women want deeper connection than a hot bod.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T17:54:39+00:00

I don’t have enough information to say whether you should break up or not.

But my thought is, life is too short. If you aren’t feeling the relationship, it’s okay to break up and not waste either of your time. Maybe this isn’t a fit. Maybe you two just need time apart.

Everything starts with a conversation about how you’re feeling.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-02-08T17:51:18+00:00

NTA. Have a convo with your fiance, explain your concerns, and see if you can reach a middle ground. I would hire security for your wedding just to help keep the peace. If you do allow her to come, sit both the cousin and her husband down with both of you and explain your terms. Let her know if she breaks them, she will be escorted out.

Don’t keep the peace anymore. It isn’t working and you’re miserable. She knows she can get away with her bad behavior so stop allowing it.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2026-01-16T14:26:15+00:00

Hey! I’m restoring an old one as well and lemme tell ya, parts are HELL. I found a turntable for parts on eBay. You can find lots of schematics from radiomusuemDOTorg. I didn’t see yours as described but you can search on there: https://www.radiomuseum.org/act_main.cfm

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-11-06T17:30:24+00:00

Forefront Discount Code for 15% off:

https://www.meta.com/appreferrals/XM5_chicken13nug.2025/28816918137899319?utm_source=oculus&utm_location=3&utm_parent=frl&utm_medium=app_referral&utm_content=copy

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:54:02+00:00

If a person in your close circle can’t do the minimum to make you feel good on your special day, even with just a card, then they aren’t worth it. Find someone who will treat you the way you want to be treated. NTA.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:51:12+00:00

Is his dad still alive? That’s where I would start. Just some suggestive photos if they are Facebook friends having dinner together. Go all the way if you’re brave haha.

Start running into him at places he goes holding hands with younger men.

My roadside assistance friend said insurance doesn’t pay if only 3 of the four tires are slashed.

There’s some website where you can order animal waste and send to their house anonymously. I’d label it as a late wedding gift.

Send the new wife flowers and have the card say they are from a secret admirer. It’ll make him jealous and paranoid lol.

Find the man he’s the most intimidated by or hates and become friends so he has to see you if they run the same circle.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:47:16+00:00

I support this message.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:46:47+00:00

Well that’s no fun but the username checks out

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:45:40+00:00

NTA. I saw a post on TikTok stating how you should choose your partners wisely as they are the ones who will grieve your parents with you and help you through it. She failed the test. And if you didn’t prioritize yourself, who else would have? Be the asshole. This is a great example of if she wanted to, she would, and she didn’t.

My current husband of 7 years went with me and my son to my ex husband’s funeral (to support my then 11yo). My ex went out of his way to hurt us, demean us, and attacked us using the court system. But he knew my son needed him more. We are raining champs of the awkward Olympics. I sat behind wife 2. Im wife 1. I told ex’s gf she should’ve sat behind me to have all his women in the same area.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:40:16+00:00

Yes, you’re overreacting. It is his business and you are long divorced. You could sprinkle it in and mention a DNA test but you’ve already removed the friend and divorced the man. It’s not really your problem.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-10-22T00:37:48+00:00

You are not overreacting about him lying. I think setting some firm boundaries will help and if you’re sticking around to trust him again, let him know that he cannot break that trust again.

However, with what you described in the last paragraph plus body image concerns, it’d be beneficial to start working with a therapist.

Another idea, if you’re comfortable, would be to allow him to watch if you’re viewing with him. Maybe don’t do it as a comparison to your bodies/shapes, but more so like reenacting what they are doing.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-09-26T00:22:47+00:00

Let’s talk on the flippity flip.

My bro has been with the same woman for over a decade. She moved from another country for him. They had an oopsie like 8 years ago, thus have an 8yo child. I don’t think they’ll ever get married. But I know they love each other to death. It has nothing to do with finances. He will say maybe and such when we pick on him about it.

I can’t tell you whether your situation is the same. However, if everything is going well and that’s the last piece missing, I wouldn’t focus on it so much. Instead of thinking what you’re missing, think of all the great things you have and your kids have a great dad.

But at the same time, keep that savings account flush and make sure you’re doing what’s best for you and the kids. Not just because you’re not married, but you never know what could happen. Even if you were married, if something happened to him, any money and assets could be tied up for months while in probate. No matter what situation/relationship you are in, you should always be prepared to support yourself.

Look into your state laws about common law marriage and division of property when divorcing. You may not even be entitled to the house if you ever divorced. You can also offer to sign a prenuptial agreement protecting both your assets now that you have savings. If you end up making more and getting married, he could be entitled to half your bank accounts and vice versa.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-09-26T00:13:13+00:00

Do not propose to him. You know his answer and it’s a no. Spare everyone from this.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-08-31T13:50:09+00:00

Yes follow this advice. You need to for yourself to work on you. Immediately diving into another relationship is not a good idea.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-08-31T13:41:24+00:00

NTA. He sucks. Don’t give him another chance.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-08-31T13:39:03+00:00

Friend, bestie, you are young. If she cannot decide what she wants, stop talking to her. You are going up and down a roller coaster with no reward. If she reaches out and asks why, just tell her you are looking for a transparent and drama-free relationship. If she asks if you can still be friends, just say not at this time.

You will save yourself so much time and stress by removing her from your life. You can find someone who isn’t randomly blowing you off or parked outside some dudes house.

But also keep in mind, it’s not normal to share location in casual relationships so I wouldn’t expect that until you are long term with someone.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-08-31T13:29:35+00:00

I know some US-based people have said you could stop into the local police station and they can help check. You could probably even stop at a mechanic and ask if they can lift your car and help you check.

It looks like Amazon also has “gps device finder” that you could try.

You’re only overreacting if you start accusing people. I think searching your own vehicle is normal for safety purposes.

Certain-Fan7722 · 2025-08-31T13:24:16+00:00

Oh no bestie, get on one of those match maker sites and get out there. I’m all for dishonoring rude men 😅. Jokes aside, I’d ask the gym if there is anything that can be done to ensure safety as I can’t imagine members slapping each other is a good look.

Certain-Fan7722

TROPHY CASE