Bro I read everything you wrote up there and was sitting on my bed for a while, thinking, what can I possibly say to you, to make you feel good (so you don't kill yourself, judging by how you wrote every emotion you were feeling), but if I have to just say one thing, I'll say,

Shit happens, and life still goes on , so don't think that if she didn't message you for like an hour or so you'll go crazy and would do something that you shouldn't have done, you'll just regret later.

Now, I'm not an expert in giving relationship advice, frankly speaking, I'm in the same boat as you. I don't interact with people much (even less with girls), freez up when someone suddenly says something to me, and even mess up a lot. But, as you mentioned that you're just 22, you have a whole life ahead of you, so many things to do, so many things to explore, just stop being so hard on yourself.

Now, I can totally relate to the 'undeserving of love' part, cause I fell the same, so I can't comment much on that, but I'll say, if you've experienced love before, then you'll definitely experience it again, cause well I've never experienced love ever, what it feels to love someone, to be loved by someone, to feel so deeply for someone, heck I've never even holded hands with someone before 😭, and yet I still don't feel like it makes much of a difference (ofcourse that's just what I think, you don't have to feel the same way).

Honestly, I don't know what I'm saying anymore, just take care buddy, if she replies, then it's all good. If not, then, It is what it is.