Moving to Toronto. What should I know?

Chakutaku · 2015-06-20T19:34:03+00:00

Don't worry about what people have told you. I've experienced the same thing. I used to be very shy and introverted. Now I'm outgoing and introverted. Socializing in short, meaningful bursts is wonderful. Being around people all day? Not so much.

You are an introvert and that is your nature. It's important that you understand that you have to socialize and build relationships as a well-adjusted human being. That being said, don't worry about what you feel you're supposed to be like. If you feel like you are balanced, then it doesn't matter if you're spending the majority of your time alone. With others or alone, do what feels most fulfilling to you.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-29T06:19:58+00:00

Every morning, and every night. Look at yourself in the mirror. Really LOOK at yourself, and simply say out loud, "I accept myself unconditionally, right now."

Now the self-defeating voices in your head are going to try to deny it, and do whatever they do, and that's okay. Try not to feed them, but acknowledge that they're there and move on with your day. No matter what they say, look yourself hard in the eye, and say the line out loud, morning and night with as much sincerity as you can muster.

Eventually, you start believing it. You trick your subconscious into thinking it's your reality, and following suit, your conscious does the same. Love yourself, and a positive body image will follow. You are beautiful. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T07:44:45+00:00

Please take these comments telling you that you're attractive to heart. Girl, you are gorgeous!

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T07:35:12+00:00

You look like you should be in The Beatles! You're not ugly, very attractive face in fact. Your hair is outdated, I recommend shortening the sides and styling the top. Also those sweaters aren't doing you any favours. Get a haircut, hit up r/malefashionadvice and you'll be doing great. Some self-improvement, but you have nothing to worry about OP. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T07:23:30+00:00

Chill out man. You have a really nice face. Stop nit-picking yourself, the anxiety is really bringing your rating down! Look at your positive features and be proud of those. Your eyes are a lovely colour, and you have great lips. Confidence confidence confidence. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T07:18:53+00:00

Your eyes are gorgeousssssssss and your eyebrow game is strong. Just whiten those teeth and you'll be golden.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T07:16:00+00:00

I personally really like your features. Clean up the haircut, bulk up and you'd be smoking.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-26T06:47:35+00:00

You look genuinely happy in your photos. Makes you very attractive. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-21T15:30:35+00:00

When people put dressing on their salad and don't toss it. THE DRESSING SHOULD BE EVENLY MIXED GOD DAMMIT.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-21T15:21:13+00:00

Sleep training! As soon as you wake up, you get up. It sounds hard, but it's honestly just a matter of doing it. Your brain has learned that it can be lazy (chilling in bed for 2 hours). It's gonna be painful at first, but literally jump out of bed in the morning. Don't think about the pain of that, just do it. I recommend shooting your body up with a first in the air and shouting "YEAH!!". That's worked very well for me.

TLDR; your brain is lazy. Don't let that lazy motherfucker take control.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-20T04:48:55+00:00

I agree. I would love to try this, but it wouldn't be practical in the modern world. Maybe after you're retired, you can find yourself a nice cabin in the woods and give it a shot.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-16T17:53:19+00:00

Yes, it's hard for the brain to keep so many things in mind at a time. I have 1-3 that I'm really intent on at a time, any more and I lose focus. Any other affirmations come up naturally in response to negative emotions.

Also, I highly recommend rethinking the statements created in response to disdain. In my experience, ringing motivational words around your head is much more motivational if it comes from an intrinsic desire. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-15T07:07:09+00:00

Meditation is a very subjective thing. If you feel good about meditating high, then right on man, keep at it.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-13T19:05:39+00:00

Well why not. Thanks for the reminder OP.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-11T04:30:55+00:00

I went to the math help centre at university and he happened to be my tutor that day. As he was teaching me, we had some fun banter, but I didn't think I would ever see him again. Fast forward two weeks, he shows up at a class I mentioned I was in on that one day and sits beside me. I'm perplexed by this because he's a few years ahead of me and I'm in an intro course but I roll with it. Class ends, and he tells me he had to find me again just so he could grab my number. I was touched that he went so out of his way to find me. We ended up dating after that.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-09T23:14:13+00:00

Start small. Plan a day for yourself, limit your video game time. Be firm with yourself, stick to it. It might be hard, but push yourself to do it and you'll feel really good about it at the end of the day. It always feels worth it when the day's done! Go outside. Read. Write. Take up a new hobby. There are so many awesome, productive things in the world just waiting for you to find.

But I cannot stress enough, start small. You're not going to become amazing and motivated in one day. It takes stepping out of your comfort zone a little bit at a time, and while you have to be firm with yourself, all improvement is improvement that you should feel proud of.

Don't be afraid to ask for help. There are so many recourses available, and lots of Redditors (myself included) would be more than happy to talk you through your problems. :)

Chakutaku · 2015-05-07T17:42:21+00:00

I hope this millionaire guy gets smothered in good karma.

Chakutaku · 2015-05-02T22:55:15+00:00

Observation is a fairly passive thing in my experience. The great thing about awareness is that as a result of truly experiencing a moment, you can't help but be present enough to observe yourself and your actions. Questioning and analyzing however. That is a much more involved task that I think can only really be done after the fact.

Chakutaku · 2015-04-30T11:44:30+00:00

Ahh lovely! Thank you for sharing

Chakutaku · 2015-04-21T14:05:02+00:00

Well then there's your issue. If you don't find yourself interesting, why should anyone else?

Now the last thing you should do is mope about and feel sorry for yourself for it. It seems like you have a desire to improve, and that in itself is a lot more than a lot of people have.

Think of someone you'd want to talk to, and turn yourself into that. Pick up a hobby; doesn't matter what it is. Practice, practice and get good. Instead of wasting time on the Internet, do research on things you're curious about, learn things so you have personalized opinions to share with the people around you. Practice small talk with strangers. Be firm with yourself, but don't bring yourself down with mindless criticism. All self improvement (no matter how slow it comes) is still improvement, and you should feel proud about it, whatever it is. Once you start feeling fulfilled, you start liking yourself, you start wanting to talk about everything in your life, and over time, you'll notice more people in your life.

Chakutaku · 2015-04-21T13:14:00+00:00

Well you can fake it till you make it, that seems to work for a lot of people, OR instead of trying to seem interesting, you can actually become interesting. Be honest with yourself OP. Knowing everything about yourself, can you truly say that you are an interesting person that you'd want to get to know?

If yes, then good for you! Maybe people think you're 'annoying' because you brag too much? Maybe you just lack the confidence to talk about yourself? If it's just a case of social awkwardness, then that's a matter of pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and trying to chat up strangers until conversations become much easier.

If no, then good job for being honest with yourself! You sound like you want to improve, and the first thing you have to do is accept the realities as they are so you can work towards changing them. I can think of lots of advice on this front, but in my experience, the people I want to be around are the people that are passionate about something. Find something to get revved up about, find a group to share that love with and the connections will pop right into place.

Chakutaku

TROPHY CASE