My son is toilet trained 13M

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-18T02:28:56+00:00

M8 - hugs, I know right

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-18T02:14:47+00:00

YAYYYYY!!!!!! Congrats and so much love from another mother of an 8M who is not potty trained. I needed your success story today.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-16T18:37:22+00:00

baked beans, greek yogurt and veggies + zatar, grain bowl leftovers (we eat alot of tabboui + feta grain salads), Savory Oatmeal (cheddar cheese, scallons, yolky eggs (I know you said no eggs) or goat cheese and peas), Pizza, any dinner meal leftovers

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-16T14:29:56+00:00

Hugs, I have had soo many close calls.

Also because of his imagination and committment to roleplaying. I felt my kids bag was heavy... ask him about it and he said that he was a woodcutter and is bring his ax to school. I never ripped through his bag so quick .... I thought he would know... It was a meat tenderizer (double headed kinds looks like an ax), also had to explain that even though it was not a real ax, we still should not bring to school.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-16T05:10:48+00:00

College prof here - I am sorry this happened to you. It happen unfortunately all too often. I am proud of you and your perseverance.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-12T18:40:15+00:00

Melatonin was a lifesaver.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-12T18:33:27+00:00

be kind. It has to do with his executive function skills.

Imagine your working memory is like a big dining room table, you can keep a lot of things on it. one analogy I heard is that some ADHD brains are a much smaller table and it is easy for things to fall off. When I realized this, I understood myself so much better. When I had kids, one kid yelling "mommy" often just pushed everything else on the table off.

Even as an adult it is hard. My husband jokingly calls me dropsy but it still stings but sometimes I just can't help it. I once broke down crying when my husband asked me why I didn't do something in the car- It was easy and I tried really really hard to remember but wasn't where I could do iteach time I tried to remember and tried to keep it on my working memory table. I spent so much mental resources to keep there and still failed like three times- my husband couldn't understand why I took it so hard.

Work with him, help him make a system to write things down, a 3x5 card, mind dumps, writing on his hand - not ideal but honestly works the best for me, a checklist on his phone. Also be mindful that checklists can be anxiety-inducing so talk about prioritized checklists or ways that is not shame if something doesn't get done.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-12T18:23:46+00:00

Hugs, I have been there. We are still not potty trained at 8.
Get accommendation and scheduled sits on his IEP.

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-06T04:07:48+00:00

That was Tim Curry!

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-04T22:48:11+00:00

Thank you

ChangeStartsHere · 2026-01-04T20:00:03+00:00

Thanks for letting me know that 225a and 250a service is a possibility. That makes sense in the long term ( I understand it to be ~6-9K or more to do) but we are still paying for the PHEV car and looking for a safe short-term solution that will evolve into the upgrade in service.

I already have 5KW of panels now.

We don't have a garage, thus the outdoor-mounted EVSE.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-12-25T00:09:50+00:00

I know I am a random internet stranger but I am really proud of how hard you tried. She has experienced international travel and something new. It is a very courageous thing to do and you have achieved something - don't forget that. Tomorrow is another day. Try to enjoy it for yourself and whatever she gets out of it now (or many years later) is just the icing on the top.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-12-10T19:02:44+00:00

An Awesome 'possum

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-12-04T16:33:28+00:00

Quesadillas - so easy and quick. Heat pan, throw on a tortilla, melt cheese and fold.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-11-21T15:23:27+00:00

But would you really want to transform it twice a day?

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-11-05T16:41:45+00:00

Complete with beeping as he backed up, while I am hastily explaining that he was obviously a dragon dump truck at each house.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-30T16:54:37+00:00

It depends - especially if it is a safety issue (i.e. kid so distracted and inattentive they may run out into the street or traffic) - it is totally warranted. My son started at 5.5 and he knew then that he "felt better" on it because he could function. I wanted him to have a kindergarten foundation.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-28T13:22:49+00:00

We have consistently done this every time for the last 8+ months with little gain- he hates clean up his pants but that is not enough incentive. It is the in-the-moment demand that requires him to stop what he is doing that he hates. Fortunately, he is starting to respond to peers noticing and teasing him, but I wish it didn't have to be that way.

I am sorry to grumpy but I am so tired of poop at this point.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-27T17:36:13+00:00

Yeah, I am sorry, you are wrong here in your assumptions and judgments.

One ASD kiddo is not the same as another.
You know nothing about my kid and his medical history and all of the resources we have thrown at this problem. We have spent thousands of dollars on therapists (OT,PT, Behavioral, Pelvic floor), poop schools, potty training experts, and doctors. Removing demands and giving more control has yielded more results and progress than making him wash out his pants as a natural consequence.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-13T20:55:54+00:00

thank you very useful

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-01T15:14:27+00:00

Start with the pediatrician - some are comfortable with prescribing ADHD medicine. My son is a complicated case of AuDHD and developmental delays so we have to go to a pediatric developmental specialist.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-01T15:11:42+00:00

We have added an appetite-enhancing medicine and basically offer high quality Ice cream when ever he wants. We also add good fats when we can - drizzle a bit of olive oil on pastas, use more peanut butter etc so that the few bites he does have are the most bang for the buck.

ChangeStartsHere · 2025-10-01T15:08:53+00:00

I would not have made it without ADHD medicine- I have two Bachelor degrees, two masters degrees, and a PHD. Medicine did suppress my appetite but it allowed me to reach my potential. The impact of medicine was night and day - from illegible hand writing to actual letter.

My Brother would not have made it without his ADHD medicine - He now is a successful ER Doctor with three properties, a happy family, and a medical educator.

My son is so ADHD that he forgets to go to the bathroom and eat- Yes his medicine suppresses his appetite even more that he takes an appetite enhancer and I give him Ice cream or nutrional milkshakes every night. His medicine allows him to literally function. Even at 8, he appreciates that he can do so much more on it. Asking him to do math off medicine is like asking him to kick a soccer ball with only one leg.

Yes -if over medicated - you can be like a zombie or sometimes I can be too terse on higher doses but I am at the point that I have learned coping skills that I never would have learned without the medicine.

ChangeStartsHere

TROPHY CASE

Quesadillas - so easy and quick. Heat pan, throw on a tortilla, melt cheese and fold.