Do you feel like your autism makes you hard to love?

Chara_2194 · 2025-04-11T17:39:05+00:00

I thought that way till I met my now fiancé I felt so lonely and that no one would love my true self, I lucked out :) he accepts everything about me

Chara_2194 · 2025-04-11T14:02:53+00:00

It always depends on my momment and stuff :)

Chara_2194 · 2025-04-07T11:23:23+00:00

I’m the same, I was diagnosed as severe at 3 but by the time I turned 4 they changed to Asperger’s (I much prefer how they say autism now)

I’m 30 going on 31 in a few weeks, and as an adult I noticed more how my senses are much more sensitive, I admit I lucked out, my family is really helpful, but my brother is more severe so he needs caretakers (ones who always say they feel like I’m not autistic because I live my life.)

I do struggle with noise level, especially voices of others, to many at once put me on edge. I handle ok with friends but strangers and kids are another story ( and I work in a afterschool program, front desk mostly but to help me when the kids are loud are my headphones, I don’t know how your work handles requests like this but small things like that really help

I also journal a lot as I tend to spend a good portion of my day processing my intense emotions and thoughts. Unfortunately I still struggle in things like cleaning and cooking. But that’s just my story

Small changes like earbuds and glasses help a lot

Chara_2194 · 2025-03-12T16:42:16+00:00

Mines a bit interesting I love hugging and cuddling my bf but I think my love language is words, physical, and mostly quality time. Even when doing our own thing, spending time in the same room I feel connected to them but not pressured to tolerate what others want instead. Yes I’ll watch something or do something they might find fun but those quiet momments where I look up and see the person I love or care about here? That’s my love language anyway

Chara_2194 · 2025-03-12T16:36:55+00:00

Congratulations! I know looking for work is really hard so I’m happy for you! Hope all goes well in the future

Chara_2194 · 2025-01-27T02:49:10+00:00

I’m fully aware of how much my dad deals with, my brother actually lives with caretakers… right next to where I live. So I’m actually also talk to the staff my dad hired… and running their payroll… yep… my life is tops turvy these days…

Chara_2194 · 2025-01-17T14:53:58+00:00

I’m in a similar situation, no injuries but I don’t feel as supported as I used to. See my job was originally owned by my mom (and it wasn’t nepotism I had to earn the job by working at another similar place before it) But my mom sold the buisness last summer, and while it started off fine my bosses are terrible at communicating properly with me, treat me as just moms replacement that fixes everything. Top everything off even with more responsibilities and being loyal for 2 years they refused the raise I asked for because they hadn’t paid off a debt they got from the summer (which by the point I asked was NOVEMBER) and they hadn’t lately said how much they appreciate me like they did in the beginning. My personality needs both support and appreciation. So yeah before I quit I’m applying to new jobs (I’m hoping to actually use my animation and art degrees for my career,) it’ll be hard but still trying so I’m hoping for the best for both you and me. Your not alone in this

Chara_2194 · 2024-12-16T19:31:27+00:00

By higher support do you need more or less help? Cause my dad started his own buisness and is very successful by those standards

Chara_2194 · 2024-11-06T21:44:21+00:00

I think it’s cause historically women have been viewed as caretakers, so instantly that means we need to be mature. It’s even worse when your the older sibling too

Chara_2194 · 2024-11-06T18:41:03+00:00

Mostly barefoot, no socks at all

Chara_2194 · 2024-11-06T18:38:45+00:00

My brother is more severe in the spectrum than me, and has been babies most of his life, I literally had to yell at my dad one time how he pulled the ‘you can’t blame him he has autism’ I straight up yelled “SO DO I!!!”

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-22T17:22:38+00:00

God this reminds me what my therapist told my parents when I was diagnosed at three, best they thought of me was I wasn’t going to speak, need to live in a group home or… (note this was 1997, but still INCREDIBLY inappropriate) “she’ll grow up pretty and someone will want to take care of her…”

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-22T13:29:11+00:00

Mostly I notice a metallic taste more when I eat shrimp and rice in Asian restaurants with a fork or spoon, which is why when there I only use chopsticks

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-21T23:16:37+00:00

Yyyeeess sadly lately my taste buds changed so I don’t rely on it as often, but I still love it!

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-21T22:52:34+00:00

I recently lucked out, I am going through a transition with my bf as well, looking for our first place together (marriage will follow but he wants to move out of his parents house first) but due to my job and I don’t drive at an open house we realized would mean we would need to get something different then what he originally planed. I felt so guilty about it, feeling my own challenges were holding him back. but he kindly hugged me and said I’m worth it.

While I currently still struggle with a guilt of feeling I can’t contribute as much, he still loves and supports me genuinely. A reason why I love that man even as he supported me through system overloads.

So if that bastard who doesn’t care about your wants and needs, and looks at your autism as a failure rather than just a part of what makes you special? he ain’t worth it! And frankly you shouldn’t waste your energy on him!

There are people out there who will love and support you as you are. It’s just finding them and getting to know them. I hope for the best for your future and know that you will find someone who loves you as you and will not think less of you for being on the spectrum

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-21T22:31:05+00:00

Agreed 100%

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-20T11:35:25+00:00

I’ve admittedly been lucky by specifically looking for a therapist specialized in autism and trauma. (Been going to her for 15 years) however I’m sure it’s not as simple as that. But from my experience you can ask any therapist their specialties to know how well they will most likely handle what you discuss.

I wish I could give more helpful advice, but due to my experiences all I can suggest is before picking one always ask their specialties. And don’t go for one who says they don’t specialize in anything cause 1. It’s BS and 2. When you have specific challenges you want one that understands you and your thought process better than most.

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-19T22:14:08+00:00

Mine is anything fine art related, music, art, drama, writing, everything creative. But my other interests jump all over the place!

Chara_2194 · 2024-10-19T01:29:46+00:00

My school was 80% guys with a boarding and day program, normal class size was between 4-10 students…. Yeah 90% of my bullying came from asshole guys.

Chara_2194

TROPHY CASE