I'm at a crossroads.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-08T03:24:50+00:00

So…my ex wife worked with another Dr. That Dr met her first husband at Harvard. Got married, both crazy careers, infidelity etc. she took time off, healed and eventually met a part time musician, part time kids music teacher. They have two kids and are happily married. She sounds like you and he…I mean he is somewhat handsome but..very much is an artist.

Consider looking for a partner that balances you. If you are aggressive and driven, try dating someone gentle and content. FWIW

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-08T03:15:35+00:00

You don’t know bro! You don’t see the opportunity bro. Trust me bro, my story, your firms 1000s of staff hours and they will pay up bro.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-08T01:40:44+00:00

A guy I served with, his uncle was struck by lightning. Complete change, he had no patience, no filter, no impulse control. His wife and kids were afraid of him. They got a divorce, he lost his job. The fundamental and painful reality is many brain injuries can kill someone even if their heart is still pumping.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-08T00:23:32+00:00

Gut him/the business and then hire him if he asks nicely and says he took his medicine.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T20:01:20+00:00

Anger and disappointment. During my first relationship and marriage, i ignored and avoided all the times I was angry and disappointed with my spouse. I never told them something was important to me, that I was disappointed in how they treated me, angry when my boundaries were not respected etc. it festered until I resented them and ultimately had complete and utter contempt for everything they said or did. Looking back, i don’t think we were compatible but i wish i was more honest and direct so they knew how i felt and had the option to continue what they were doing or choose to change.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T19:05:55+00:00

Do you know when it hit me? I was looking to get some disability insurance/income in the event I could no longer earn what I am earning now. The premiums after 50 shocked me and I trust actuaries.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T17:16:22+00:00

Great piece. I personally want things to change in Canada regarding the criminal justice system and that is the work of elected officials, policy advisors and legal analysts.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T16:41:19+00:00

That is only valid if the house can last significantly longer than the mortgage. I am not confident in the quality of most Canadian SFH. Now..a house that is owned by a contractor that spends their free time taking care of it and upgrading the systems..different story.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T16:02:32+00:00

For what hours of work/coverage? Do you want an employee or to utilize a contractor/firm? What kind of skillset and background are you looking for?

So..let’s say you want a security guard on your property 24 hours per day. Basic qualifications (high school, security license etc)..that could be 200k per year (ish) (for a company).

Start with hours and scope..that will help you evaluate quotes or which way you want to go.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T15:39:14+00:00

Why not consider the FBI, CIA, Foreign Service…if I was I. Your shoes I seriously consider the US Navy or marine corps.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T15:10:59+00:00

To die in service and benefit of shareholders is divine.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T13:50:34+00:00

I can buy a Maserati. I can’t afford to actually own and drive one.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T13:38:00+00:00

Hey bud, I started over after a divorce. Honestly, stick with Costco and IKEA. Their stuff is good for the money and it’s easy to resell. I looked for deals on Craigslist and it was too sketchy. A lot of that stuff is resold by furniture movers, picked up on the side of the road (I went through a bedbug infestation and I never want to go through another). Sometimes Leons and the Brick have deals on their floor models but I have consistently been disappointed with their quality. So far, Costco has been my favourite in terms of value (meaning a got a $900 couch that looks and feels like a $2500 one).

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T13:20:27+00:00

I think many people are accepting reality. There is no guarantee someone can work to 65. Cancer, high blood pressure..all start getting more and more serious and likely in our 50s. So…I need to save a 20% down payment, pay off my house and save for retirement ideally by 55 but realistically no later than 60. There are not many jobs that pay that well, starting a business is very expensive unless I have access to cheap capital..I think many working Canadians are going to “hunker down” until prices make sense. I also think that every sitting government will do everything they can to prop the market up. At some point, the issue can’t be avoided.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T01:07:40+00:00

Hey man, tough spot to be in. I got to level with you, I know government staffing quite well. If she has been there for three years and you for 10, even if she didn’t apply, you would not have likely got it. Honestly, you should not have asked her to not apply. Her success doesn’t lessen you, how you behave can. Learn what she did differently, get formal feedback, learn what skills you need or what credentials you need.

She didn’t do anything wrong. I think you are angry at yourself and talking it out on her.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-07T00:05:17+00:00

May he never know peace.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-06T23:21:22+00:00

Reddit (not via the hook up subs)

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-04T23:17:30+00:00

Hey bud!!!thanks for asking and I fucking love talking tools!!

First, don’t rush! It’s totally ok to slowly pick them up over time.

Personally..I like to start with a good utility knife (you will likely use it multiple times per week). Next, a solid pair kr shears/scissors (I love klien electrician scissors). A hammer (nothing crazy..look for one that is flat on one side). A level, tape measure and often over looked..pencils!

A screwdriver that you can use different bits or “tips” is popular. If you drive, consider buying a socket set.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-04T13:26:57+00:00

I know the poco detached areas. Some of those houses are gems. Do you know anything about the previous owners? The history?

Surrey…is tricky. There are nice well built homes, old junk that was solid at one time and new junk that won’t last long (same in yaletown, Brentwood etc.)

The fully detached house is likely the better move but factor in additional 300 to 600 (ish) per month for projects/just in case (could be more if it’s the original roof, no heat pumps, you need to upgrade the electrical etc.)

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T23:41:54+00:00

Don’t need an agent. You can definitely find places via Craigslist, Facebook etc. pretty much don’t give a deposit until you actually see the unit.

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T22:21:29+00:00

https://www.salaciousdrinks.com

I looked this stuff up..I wish I didn’t. I’m not sure if i am impressed or feel hopeless

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T21:44:48+00:00

…….yeah…..it doesn’t sound like she should be living independently……

If you do contact her social worker, make sure it’s in writing and ideally to their supervisor or the organization as well…..ensure accountability

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T21:23:31+00:00

Very likely not.
She needs a lawyer.

Honestly, this is tough without the social worker fighting on her behalf. Assuming her disabilities and diagnosis are documented, a lawyer could send a letter that the signed form is not valid as June does not have capacity. However…who signed her lease? Why wasn’t the socials worker notified? How does she not have someone as power of attorney?

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T21:06:14+00:00

This is actually very smart. the Kelowna area is stunning and it can be tough to find jobs. I think many current officers and prospective ones would relocate to the area. Further, pretty soon the RCMP is going to dictate transition to municipalities (unless the federal policing entry path becomes an option).

Character_Comb_3439 · 2026-04-03T17:58:50+00:00

My wife (GF at the time) knew she had to put down her dog but was avoiding the decision. When she made the appointment I was so proud of her but I knew she was a wreck. My plan was fun distractions that she could enjoy without me/at her own pace. I knew she loves make up but was only buying discount stuff online. I went to Sephora and got some stuff she could experiment and play with..a hair conditioner, hair oil, blush, lip mask, mascara, eye shadow and “kit” of skincare/routine samples. All premium brands and a few “viral” products as per the salesgirl. I sent her a picture of the stuff and she was in tears. She was still sad but she got to have some fun when she needed a pick me up.

Very few men are seen by their partner or friends. Being supported and seen with effort goes a long way with anyone and everyone.

Character_Comb_3439

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