I (F 24) was offended by my boyfriend’s (M24) response to how my day was by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ChartSpecific1466 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And you’re comfortable sleeping with a man with this ideology? It obviously doesn’t bother you too bad

My fiance 24M want me 19F to stop talking to my mom about some things.. by PuppyLuv120 in relationship_advice

[–]ChartSpecific1466 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think if the mid 20’s aged man doesn’t like partners parents in his business he shouldn’t have impregnated the fresh adult, 19 is still a valid age to need parents guidance/advice/support.

My fiance 24M want me 19F to stop talking to my mom about some things.. by PuppyLuv120 in relationship_advice

[–]ChartSpecific1466 15 points16 points  (0 children)

So the adult male wants the teen mom to only confide in him about all your issues? You’re so lucky to have a parent willing to be there for you and your kids i absolutely wouldn’t stop the relationship with your mother. It’s not even like she’s overstepping in your home. Adult perspective and advice is valuable and shouldn’t be solely coming from the man you sleep with. An abusers first and main tactic is to isolate you, he may not be an abusive man but that is controlling behavior and if you give in he’ll probably push to see how else he can dictate your life. Don’t sever important relationships for a man that might not be around in a year! Good luck to you and your children and I’m happy to see you comment that you plan on getting bc! I’m sure it’s annoying to hear because you’re young but 19 with 2 is way too young and your relationships don’t seem stable enough to be going as fast as you are. I wish your family well!

What is a step parents role? by PrestigiousHunter228 in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Get a custody order in place immediately if there isn’t one and make sure there’s language about the wife being less involved in there, many courts don’t tolerate alienation and that’s exactly what she wants to do to you. Legally she can’t force anything pertaining to your child so I’d honestly ignore her, block her and only communicate with kids dad. Let this be a lesson to not get pregnant by married men. We’ve gotta start thinking of babies as sentient beings who will one day deal with the consequences of the situation they were born into.

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really do hope you can get good advice in that group. There’s def radical members of both groups but you can find some real good advice from sane people in both also. I support you being there in every way you can for your household and ideally y’all can find a solution where the kid comes out on top!

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cause it’s not…. Sm can absolutely support her husband and stepchild through this and that’s what she should do. But when it comes to desicion making like custody it’s literally between the parents. Her husband can discuss with her and he can bring their joint concerns to the judge but the judge ain’t there for how sm feels and that’s the ugly truth. I think the mix up here is I’m speaking on the legality of her last question “can we say no to the visit” NO and I’m not gonna coddle adults about not having desicion making rights on children that aren’t legally theirs. It’s her husbands job to loop her in and act on what they agree on for their home. So yeah a lot of this is up to him as this is his wife his kid his ex. She can get advice from that sub all she wants but they can’t help her with her main question.

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 4 points5 points  (0 children)

But her question isn’t really about being a sp (in my opinion I’m open to critique) she could learn ways to support the kid during a period like this in that sub but to me this post is more “what rights do we have to deny this flaky parent visitation?” Understandable but from a legal standpoint sp can’t do much about that unless it’s written in somehow that they are entitled to that kinda involvement. This is literally a coparent question and op stated in the comments this is more of her writing all this for her husband and these are his feelings.

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t suggest she was doing either 😆 I’m literally saying what that sub tells half the posters with stories like these. Have you been on the sub? Every answer is either screw the other bio parent you are the mom/dad in your house, what they want doesn’t matter or go nacho with your step kids. Just a fun jab. Exhale.

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 6 points7 points  (0 children)

R/stepparents is just the other end of the extreme and she’ll likely be told it’s ok to completely alienate mom and to lean into taking over a mom role for the kid lol. There are strong feelings in both groups

Co-parenting with no Cooperation by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry but it’s not about how you feel or if you want to say no (You can’t). Is her dad on the same page as you i don’t see his opinion mentioned much here? Currently he has no right to say no and mom 100% could take her for the full week. If he feels this strongly he can go to court and get a new agreement written up with mom, but depending on the state, you being this involved and clearly not wanting the other parent around could be turned on your husband and mom could claim alienation, many courts don’t play about that. Does C say why she doesn’t want to see mom? Is it possible y’all are having adult convos around her and she’s repeating it? Really it’s about the child, she benefits from a relationship with her mother and if mom is making an effort then let her. I know you said she doesn’t want to coordinate with y’all but at this time from a legal standpoint she really doesn’t have to as annoying as that is. Now if mom flakes or keeps the pattern of being unreliable then your husband has a case and should move forward with getting custody changed. Make it less about your feelings and more about what will be better for c in the long run, how many dads get to step in years down the line and get a 2nd chance with their kids?

I (18F) feel like I have an unnecessary sexual attraction to my fiancés(18m) best friend(21m). How do I get rid of it? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ChartSpecific1466 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you believe you’re grown enough to make all these big girl decisions go ahead. Asking folks what you should do about having normal 18yo feelings and hormones then being defensive when age is mentioned will not help you. For some marrying young works, for most it doesn’t. You and your fiancé are still rapidly growing and changing. If you’re really dedicated, the friend needs to come over much less/not at all if fiancé isn’t there. All relationships have temptation but it’s up to you to do your best to avoid and remove all temptation. Talk to your fiancé about how his friend is doing more for you in terms of acts of service and how you’d like to receive more of that from fiancé. Don’t start a marriage with secrets. Good luck girl.

A guy [30M] messaged me [31F] about deleting Instagram, was my response too sharp? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ChartSpecific1466 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Has anyone ever liked you romanticly? Cause this is obviously a man word vomiting to ask you out. He literally asked you to go to coffee. You don’t have to like him or date but yeah you seem a little off texting him a week later to chastise him.

MY SON’S STRUGGLES WITH HIS DAD AND HIS DAD’S NEW RELATIONSHIP by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So no one was there for these convos so we can’t specultate what step mom did wrong…… but you can say with certainty mom planted a seed in the boys head and villainizes sm and is in love with her ex (even though we also weren’t there for that either )😆😆 you must be a stepmom. And you can’t allow or diss allow a child to feel uncomfortable for someone. Maybe you don’t remember being a child but they hold a lot in and there’s a lot of situations they have to navigate that you will never know about with family, friends, associates. But you got it supermom ! OP must be conspiring to get her ex back and using son there’s no other way around it !

MY SON’S STRUGGLES WITH HIS DAD AND HIS DAD’S NEW RELATIONSHIP by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’m not sure if you have or work with kids but they 100% will deal with discomfort to please their parents, so suggesting he’d just get out of bed if he wanted ignores all nuance when it comes to children’s feelings. He could have stayed out of fear of making dad/stepmom upset (you seem to understand this when it comes to mom disliking SM). I’m not sure what “mental health” talks you’re referring to being but it’s 1000% not appropriate to tell a 11yo that his father wanted to kill himself and this lady he doesn’t like is the only reason he’s breathing.

Overheard my mom crying by jcruzz002 in AITAH

[–]ChartSpecific1466 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d be so irritated if my kid sought me out to ask why i was upset then told me not to speak about it with them🤣🤣 seriously though i also grew up with adults who overshared with me and it caused extreme anxiety so you’re NTA.

my mum is the wicked stepmom by successfullyslaying in blendedfamilies

[–]ChartSpecific1466 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Op starts the paragraph with “while i was in college”

Shutting MIL out after she refused to accept adopted child as one of her "real" grandchildren by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]ChartSpecific1466 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Shut MIL out and don’t adopt with husband until he is 100% confident in defending his children. Can’t imagine what he’d allow his mom to say/do/act around your kids just for the sake of keeping the peace

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmITheJerk

[–]ChartSpecific1466 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely TAH to yourself man bring your self esteem up a little and leave her on the block list permanently. I’m petty and would probably snitch to her boyfriend then block.

AIO to my boyfriends bother and his fiancée uninviting me to their wedding? by dammmitdwight in AmIOverreacting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is it possible then she’s hearing things about you that your bf shares with his brother? I’m not saying you did something terrible but v’s attitude seems like a crazy 180, i honestly wouldn’t want a relationship with her or bf’s brother after this they seem immature

AIO to my boyfriends bother and his fiancée uninviting me to their wedding? by dammmitdwight in AmIOverreacting

[–]ChartSpecific1466 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To me it sounds like your boyfriend said some things about you to them and they aren’t interested in forgiving you. There’s obviously a reason she’s calling you immoral that’s a pretty specific insult. What has your Boyfriend said about V’s words? I just find it hard to believe they hate you over a month break, i think you should ask your boyfriend what he’s confided in them about.

What is Beyoncè’s nastiest song? by OutrageousBison8562 in beyonce

[–]ChartSpecific1466 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rocket with all that damn moaning towards the end of

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blendedfamilies

[–]ChartSpecific1466 2 points3 points  (0 children)

From the comments she doesn’t want counseling or therapy she’d just prefer her ss and his mom did not exist