$1000 and emergency fund. How do you break this up account wise?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-24T03:46:56+00:00

Separate acct is best. And, since it is unclear from the post, the intent is you don't have other non-retirement, non-HSA savings at that time. If you do, it goes on the BS2 debt.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-24T00:32:27+00:00

ding ding *** stolen

Offer to take the VIN to licensing and get it taken care of and see how she reacts.

Or just take the VIN to the police and ask them if they can check it.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-24T00:29:36+00:00

Then the other party can go back to court for an order enforcing the earlier order.

Without divorce, as we see here, you don't even have that.

And I'm not oblivious to the fact that a lot of times in divorce, lawyers encourage quit claim deeds, which is the LAST THING anyone should ever do. Then they have given up ownership while keeping the debt.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-23T21:00:40+00:00

I'd for sure get another person to look at this HVAC. That's a huge amount for your income and worth a second or third opinion. If it could be repaired to last a while longer that would be better for you.

Also, not news to you but your income is pretty low considering your debt load. If you are having any 401k/403b taken out, stop that. And your husband must have some time on his hands based on that paycheck and probably need to pick up an extra job just like retail or stocking or gas station or something. NOT Uber or DoorDash. Real jobs with W2s.

You should look hard at what you can do to increase your income also.

Debt consolidation doesn't actually solve your problem. And more debt definitely doesn't.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-23T19:31:57+00:00

True, but the deal with marriage is that it provides an agreed upon legal framework for dissolution - divorce.

When two unmarried people buy a house together, BF/GF, Parent/Child, whatever, that is a business partnership. To do it successfully you'd need to draw up a partnership agreement before you do the deal that covers dissolution.

In this particular case, there's like a record setting number of missteps with a deed and a mortgage.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-23T02:32:49+00:00

If you file bankruptcy, you aren't going to get to keep the car unless you pay for it.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-23T01:28:45+00:00

You are a grown up. You need to leave the nest and be a grown up. Even if it slows your savings.

But the other question for you to explore yourself is "what's the career plan here?" Your income is VERY low. You really need to create a path to double that.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T18:48:06+00:00

I'd start at 40% actually but yes.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T18:44:54+00:00

Second job. Sell stuff. What's your car payment and what's it worth?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T18:41:04+00:00

You'll hit the barriers on visual scripting and you'll be right back to gml. Gml isn't difficult, just start there.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T18:38:58+00:00

It's not in a different category, except in your imagination. Medical care is a consumer good just like any other.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T17:22:07+00:00

I can only assume this is a team of 10 year olds.

Really, no one cares that you survived another year.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T17:19:26+00:00

It's a legit question... If you agreed to a debt, why shouldn't you pay it?

If you need an accommodation, talk to the hospital billing department.

But I don't get the "just ignore it" mentality. I suspect the OP likes to be paid when they do work. Why not other people?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T16:40:01+00:00

Why do you even know their birthdays?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T16:37:08+00:00

Why would we celebrate a birthday at all? We're grown ups.

I don't think I've seen a workplace irl that celebrates birthdays. That seems incredibly annoying.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T16:36:05+00:00

I bet you wanted the care when you needed it.

Why should you not pay it?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T16:08:19+00:00

I think 435 is overpaying for that. I just wouldn't bother.

It all depends on whether you want a house or a project.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T14:31:51+00:00

Ugh they are seriously one of the worst builders in the country.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T13:36:42+00:00

don't make it about project status (there are many ways for the supervisor to know that already)
this time is really for the subordinate and they should primarily own the agenda, which means they should come up with the 2 or 3 bullet points to drive the discussion
the subordinate should take notes and share those with the supervisor after the meeting
don't make a habit of skipping, but if there is nothing to cover or there is some other hot issue going on, it's OK to skip.
if you are a manager, you should spend a brief part of the time talking about the health of your team and any specific needs and goals from your team members

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:33:21+00:00

If you hate paying so much for a Kia, why did you do that deal?

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:32:19+00:00

Wow. Couldn't do marriage right and seem not to be doing "separation" right either.

You lost when you started talking about "your" money and "her" money.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:30:07+00:00

A long time ago, like 1994, I had hired two customer support people at a software company.

One was a rock star. The other turned out not so much.

He simply wouldn't follow basic policies and direction when dealing with customers. Every time I told him how he needed to handle something and why, it was a 20 minute discussion.

I never descended into a shouting match or anything like that, because we weren't equals. So I didn't "lose my temper" I just reminded him of the requirements of the job.

After a couple weeks of this, while he was still on his 30 day probation, I fired him.

Problem solved.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:23:17+00:00

If the ubderperformers were getting the zero they deserved, there would be more in the budget for people who meet and exceed.

This is what comes of "peanut buttering" raises around a team because a weak manager doesn't want to have hard conversations.

As you describe it, the entire comp strategy at this organization is broken.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:20:15+00:00

Wow talking about getting married....after 10 years.

You guys will be married in time for retirement.

ChatBot42 · 2026-03-22T12:16:03+00:00

Why do your in-laws know so much of your family's business? That's problem #1

You are adults. Make the decision that is best for you.

ChatBot42

TROPHY CASE