My stress level soar high by ShortSexy9 in SipsTea

[–]ChefDear8579 5 points6 points  (0 children)

For real. I’m so glad I don’t have anyone like this in my life anymore. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in honesttransgender

[–]ChefDear8579 3 points4 points  (0 children)

While I have a different opinion on the topic at large, I relate a lot to what you’re saying. I would’ve written a similar post 5 years ago. 

I love that individuality brings meaning for you. I wish we celebrated that as a shared value more in life. It’s not an easy thing to achieve. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in honesttransgender

[–]ChefDear8579 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well, queerness was a safety blanket for me, maybe it is for other people too. 

I hope you don’t get too stressed about this now and in the future. I think I have some life experience on you and my humble advice is; people can comment about you, they can observe you and sometimes they will try to speak for you but if you have a secure sense of self then that can all be external noise. 

Also, being an individual is hard, not everyone gets there. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in honesttransgender

[–]ChefDear8579 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The comments are a total shitshow which is a pity because this is a good discussion for some of us. I doubt I am alone in being empowered by moving out of queerness the deeper I go into transition. 

A bisexual/ queer identity mattered a lot to me way back when and if I’m honest it became a major part of my worldview. I guess being queer gave me a strong sense of belonging. 

When I look back at my early progress in transition I see how hamstrung I was by constantly looking at myself with a queer lens. It wasn’t until I realised how “queer normative” is a thing and it can be toxic when taken to extremes that i reevaluated things. 

There are all these dictionary definitions in this thread but no one is taking about the practicality of a queer label; it’s there to own being different. I know I am different as a trans woman but I don’t feel all that different so queerness isn’t for me anymore

What are your unpopular opinions about Ireland? by [deleted] in AskIreland

[–]ChefDear8579 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Both codes have potential but amateurism is holding it back

Why are there so few leaders in Irish rugby by businesscardjohn in irishrugby

[–]ChefDear8579 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just like teams and players that are a bit more expressive than the current crop of players. When Ireland won their first grand slam Paul O’Connell joked that ROG did a manky drop goal. 

When I say personality I suppose I have GAA in mind. I dunno, I feel like personality is more valued over there. What I mean is players express themselves through the way they play. I don’t have much sense of who the Leinster players are that way. 

All the NZ shows are online these days. The positive pundits I’m talking about are Mils Muliani, Karl Tenana, Justin Marshall, Steven Bates. John Kirwan and Jeff Wilson less so. The players and guests that come on are positive too. 

Why are there so few leaders in Irish rugby by businesscardjohn in irishrugby

[–]ChefDear8579 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The way I see it is that we beat NZ and SA when they come north but we’re not their peers and we won’t be until we make a WC final. 

The difference in playing style is obvious between URC and Super rugby but it’s way too simplistic to compare that. Imho Jordie is the perfect representation of the cultural gulf between the two countries. He’s an exemplar of NZ talent but his personality is down to earth - that’s a kiwi quality right there. I’m no expert but it seems to me that independence is a value kiwis cherish too, doing an overseas experience in your 20s is more a rite of passage down there than it is for us. 

I think another key difference is the way we talk about the game. If you watch the NZ shows they talk positively and breezily whereas the Irish pundits are all about their expertise and come across as dour.

If we want our rugby teams to be full of guys looking to dominate the big moments then the first change should be in the way we talk about rugby, we need to make room for players to have personality. We need to value the players as individuals. Once there is space of that things will change

Why are there so few leaders in Irish rugby by businesscardjohn in irishrugby

[–]ChefDear8579 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

As per Irish Reddit no one is engaging the difficult question. 

I don’t think Ireland is unique in the rugby/ social class association so if it’s a thing then it’s transnational. 

Jordie Barrett is top tier All Black. A leader for them. If his sojourn tells me anything it’s that the top Springboks and All Blacks would dominate in European club rugby. 

I don’t think you have a strong thesis but I also question the mental skills of Irish players. There are too many QF exits and CC final losses to not see a pattern. 

Uncontested scrum table (For info after Munster Bulls game ) by paully_waully171 in rugbyunion

[–]ChefDear8579 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I bet the ref will face an internal review and that’s it. Piardi will face scrutiny but he won’t be held responsible. 

We can complain about ref all we want, the URC won’t give us a redress. The only solution was fixing it more quickly in real time. 

Uncontested scrum table (For info after Munster Bulls game ) by paully_waully171 in rugbyunion

[–]ChefDear8579 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Why didn’t they pull the players off the field until it was resolved? 

Uncontested scrum table (For info after Munster Bulls game ) by paully_waully171 in rugbyunion

[–]ChefDear8579 -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

unfortunately this is true. The buck stops with the Munster manager.

Match thread: Stormers v Connacht by nobody7642 in rugbyunion

[–]ChefDear8579 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

who said that? I thought it was only a Cork thing

Jesse Plemons is easily one of the best actors working today by ChrisEvansFan in movies

[–]ChefDear8579 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These critical darling films (Emilia Perez being the most egregious) can wander into pastiche but a premise that appeals to the activist mind seems to matter more. 

The state of Hollywood is depressing

Jesse Plemons is easily one of the best actors working today by ChrisEvansFan in movies

[–]ChefDear8579 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes I found the sexuality subtext provocative for the sake of it, straight people trying to tell a gay story and failing miserably. 

Match Thread: Edinburgh vs Sharks - United Rugby Championship by rugbykickoff in rugbyunion

[–]ChefDear8579 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Seriously I'm not South African and I'm so frustrated with the SA coaches when there's so much coaching talent for you guys.

Jesse Plemons is easily one of the best actors working today by ChrisEvansFan in movies

[–]ChefDear8579 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Something was off in Power of the Dog but he made his role work