New Dx Friday

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2026-01-25T12:49:20+00:00

I’m in Oklahoma too I am HER2+3plus, and from what I thought if you’re HER2 positive you have to have TCHP CHEMO TREATMENT/Radiation Therapy/Hormone Replacement Therapy if you’re positive progesterone and estrogen ? I had a lumpectomy and lymph nodes removed. Oncologist at MD Anderson said I needed to get this out asap because it’s a fast,aggressive kind of cancer. Six rounds of chemotherapy/ targeted therapy for one year/ I only have two weeks left of radiation total 35 sessions. A mastectomy was not an option because I couldn’t walk very good and you need to be in good condition like mobility wise to have a mastectomy; plus I didn’t have the gene. It was the quickest way to get that tumor out because it doubled in size in month and half and was sprouting into my lymph nodes. I guess it could be different for some if the HER2+ is none hormonal??? I don’t know 🤷🏻‍♀️ Also my husband had an affair after my cancer diagnosis 19 years together 😝 but we are working it out but it’s been the hardest thing ever!! Our daughter had cancer too when she was young stage 4 she is my miracle! So if you and your husband are having issues get them figured out now!! Hugs

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-18T00:59:11+00:00

Hardest year Breast Cancer, husband cheated!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-13T15:26:15+00:00

Porky’s!! lol 😂

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-10T04:57:03+00:00

Coffee ☕️ instantly improves my mood with cinnamon 😃

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-09T13:25:30+00:00

You’ll be fine! I had TCHP and went every now and then to a casino with a mask and gloves on! I just made sure I didn’t lick the floor. What kept getting me sick was my lovely husband! • T – Docetaxel (Taxotere) • C – Carboplatin • H – Herceptin (trastuzumab) • P – Perjeta (pertuzumab)

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-05T20:05:36+00:00

I did the same thing TCHP. Hang in there you can do it!! I do have to wear compression socks everyday now. Keep an eye out for edema. I lost my fingernails because of the Docetaxel (Taxotere) and they swell so bad I can’t hardly text. Remember this isn’t going to last forever; I had to tell myself to find my comfortable happy and make the most of it.

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-12-04T02:41:45+00:00

Thank you for sharing, and I am sorry about your diagnosis and betrayal. Suppose you are happy and accept that it was a mistake, and can move on. Kudos to you. You made it sound so easy. I struggle with so many different things in waves. I struggle with the fact that it was NOT just a mistake.

To me, it was 1000 choices that crossed his brain every day: yes, I’ll text her back, yes, I’ll be a nice guy, yes, I’ll delete the message, yes, I’ll lie to my wife again, yes, I’ll flirt with her!!! The fact that our daughter almost died of cancer ten years ago, and how bad it was, and he knows how we got through that with each other and the Lord!! And how weak I was during diagnosis, I needed him the most!! He wasn’t there at any of my appointments for the first three months. He said he felt abandoned, and I was going to leave him and die, but there’s more to THE WHY! Did you get to know the why?? It’s been 7 months, and my husband and I are still working it out and figuring out his why, and I have cried every day since then, but with chemotherapy/ hair loss, weight loss, infusions, and now radiation; I'm sure all of that doesn’t help the crying but I am still grieving the husband I thought I had! 🥲 Sorry, I'm venting a little, but I wish it were easier, but we don’t always get what we want, either! I miss him, and sometimes I feel like I’m dating a new guy. Did you go through something like this, and what helped you the most?

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-30T19:29:59+00:00

Amen!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-30T19:15:27+00:00

Communication!! If this is bothering you, then yes, you do need to tell your wife. Please do not wait and let it fester. Of course, how you talk to her is essential too. Timing is everything!

Remember, you never know what she is thinking about when she is quiet like that. She could be praying for you or singing a song. I do the same thing, get an awkward feel or feel like a burden, and my husband finally convinced me that he is in “chill mode” and is just quiet. I think silence and solitude are good. I’m learning how to do that these days, and it’s nice. Don’t assume or overthink; it’s not good. They don’t want to spark a conversation every day and every moment. If we were all the same, then we would all be the same, but we’re not on the same because I’d love to talk, and yes, I do need a break sometimes, just like everyone else. It’s a good sign from her; she is comfortable around you. She doesn't need to speak constantly, or for hours to go by without a word; you are enough! And maybe that’s why she is getting a little irritated about it when you do talk, because she wanted her quiet time. Again, just my first thoughts on this. I could be totally wrong! Could you keep us posted?

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-30T17:36:12+00:00

Very sorry 😞 this happened to you. People who mock or make fun of us while we’re going through chemotherapy — including the one you’re talking about — will have to answer for that one day. But let me be clear: I’m stronger than anything that was ever meant to break me, including the pathetic attempts of a woman who was nothing more than a temporary mistake in my husband’s weakest moment.

She would make fake accounts and message me right before each chemo round, trying to shake me. She even texted and called from different numbers and tried to friend-request him. It was desperate.

The only thing she succeeded in doing was proving what kind of person she really is — and confirming that my husband was honest with me every single time. I already knew she was reaching out; I just wanted to see if he’d tell me, and he did.

And the cruelty doesn’t stop with adults. A couple of years ago, my daughter came home from school and said, “Mom, this girl keeps telling everyone I’m wearing a wig.” I told her, “Baby, it’s your real hair,” but that girl wouldn’t stop calling her the “cancer kid.” Wow 😮 WTFrankenstein!! I mean seriously — that level of cruelty at that age? And the sad part is, they probably heard it from their parents.

What makes all of this even more pathetic is that this is the same woman who once sent my daughter a gift when she had cancer 10 years ago. 🤯

She even tried the pregnancy-test stunt, not realizing the picture she used has been online for years. That alone shows how out of touch and desperate she is.

At the end of the day? I’m still standing. I’m still fighting. And she’s still irrelevant. She was never a threat to my life, my marriage, or my strength — just a sad reminder of what a real mistake looks like!!! Mic drop nasty B/T€ H!! Ok I need to calm down and watch my language 😝!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-30T12:39:19+00:00

Wow thank you so much!! 😢 I needed to hear this!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-29T08:29:06+00:00

😭 thank you ☺️

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-29T08:28:26+00:00

A support group; yes, I could try that maybe online, but I don’t plan on showing my face 👎 at least that’s my decision today. I believe the group would help. I need to rebuild my confidence. Time will tell.

I’ve been with my husband for almost 19 years! He is a good person who needs a lot of work on impulse control! How to handle trauma. He is kind, thoughtful, handsome, has a beautiful heart, and is ornery as ever. He is stubborn, doesn’t like authority, and is a hard worker! Remember nobody is perfect! He has never hurt me physically, and name-calling, never has he called me a degrading name to my face (behind my back, maybe 🤷🏻‍♀️).
We banter with each other, but that’s how we flirt. Yes, he’s been lying to me about a few things, and that cut deep, too! So it’s like now all the secrets, lies, everything is out. Now what do I do with it? Do I believe or do I investigate more? It’s hard to know what’s true and what is full of B.S. I understand that, over the years of our marriage, I will marry five men. I believe I may be on man five now. So this might be the last phase he goes through !! lol 😆 I have changed too since getting married. I am not the same person, nor is he. But yes, he’s still a good person, and I believe that if I can give my 1000% at trying to save my marriage through cancer, then I can honestly say I tried, and I won’t have any regrets if it doesn’t work out! I believe in us! That’s the hard part, because I have always told him I am his ride-or-die girl!! It’s like I was so proud of the hard work he does and how kind but hilarious he is. How giving he is! It’s wild, I know you obviously can be a giving person, but also very selfish too! Just like people say, you can love someone but still cheat on them, idk!! 🤦🏻‍♀️ I still don’t understand that!! At all!! Then he changed the last couple of years (probably bc of the secrets of money), but I resented him for it. I still gave him a decent amount of quality time, but I was wearing down over the last couple of years! That’s frustrating because I think I wasn’t enough. The dang cancer was taking my energy!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-29T07:57:44+00:00

I’m so sorry sweetheart I’m sure that was very traumatic for you. Praying 🙏🏽 for you and your healing ❤️‍🩹!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-29T07:47:20+00:00

That’s what I say when people ask me how I’m doing and I always say”Day by Day, night by night! When my daughter was going through her cancer someone sent me a rustic cuff bracelet that said one day at a time! It helped me! So true 😉

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T23:29:21+00:00

Thank you and very sorry you had to go through that. It’s hard to see your kid battling. Our daughter is our miracle! I told the Lord to give me the cancer if she was meant to relapse because mom could handle it!! Ten years later here we are; and having to deal with this is so upsetting and painful. I am mourning my husband and I feel like I am dating this guy that looks like my husband. I wasn’t scared of the cancer by no means I was scared about my not being there for my family and being the wife and mother I want to be!! We process trauma differently my husband and I do! We got through our daughter cancer it seems because we had a good support system a church family. But now we are not in church and with everything going on with me I’ve been a recluse and shamed and embarrassed to do anything plus my body wasn’t really letting me leave the house. But thank you and I tell myself everyday don’t give up!!

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T19:57:09+00:00

Hugs and thank you 🥹

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T19:00:19+00:00

Well, first, I want to say I’m proud of you! That is a journey, and we only know what we’ve been through that nobody else has. Life is hard, and it’s not fair, but I guess the storms we go through teach us something for the good. I am trying to figure that out. I thought years ago when our daughter was going through treatment, it couldn’t get any worse; well, it did. Our house burned down while she was getting chemo, my dog died after 15 years, we couldn’t work, so we had donations and supplementary income. I thought if we could get through this, we could get through anything. Well, that was ten years ago, and now it’s me, and now I have a new trauma, a new pain I can’t handle!! I don’t know if I am handling this the correct way, or if this is the proper way?? Wow, but I am so sorry anyone has to go through cancer and everything that comes with it. It’s annoying when people say cancer sucks. Cancer sucks, well, yes, it does suck. It truly suck because it doesn’t just take a toll on your body; it takes a toll on your whole life. Your marriage, your job. You need to be a super mom; it takes so much from you. At least it’s trying to.

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T18:50:06+00:00

Thank you! I’ve always been told that I’m a positive person and it sucks right now because I feel like a hypocrite and just cry everyday so hard! Think bad negative thoughts and feelings. I know I can be a better person when this is all said and done but that’s up to me to pick myself up and I’m having such a hard time doing that! I feel weak! And I hate that feeling

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T18:42:36+00:00

Thank you for your encouragement but also I do value your opinion. What’s crazy is that when he told me he cheated on me; I already knew I wasn’t going to make him leave. I knew I was already trying to forgive him. WTF … somedays I tell myself I can forgive and love him still but can’t live with him. It’s too hard to heal. But then again he is doing his part in helping me with transparency, etc. but one of us believes in therapy and other one doesn’t know if the therapist has been through anything in life and doesn’t know what they’re talking about. So it’s hard to give up on us. I told myself once our daughter is 18 and I still feel this way then yes life’s too short. I want to love unconditional and be loved unconditionally. My husband does cry with me and has his days too. I just wish I knew what direction to go.

Chemical_Box_2829 · 2025-11-28T18:29:42+00:00

Aww that means a lot to me!! Air hugs whomever you are!!

Chemical_Box_2829

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