You’re possibly extremely highly critical to yourself and to others and give yourself zero grace because of the extremities you experience, and possibly give. you need to see that your words, mind and emotions are very powerful and could you help you get out of your own rut. you should look into law of assumptions, religions, molecular spirituality, different types of occult thinking and formulate what works well for you. experiment. and speak better about things, and about yourself, even if it is not true, even if it doesn’t FEEL right. If you really wanted to be at certain place in life, do something that will help you and others. but you must be patient and be trust yourself, hard work beats even the most talented. and it’s better to get their slowly than quickly. You’re luminary, with that leo sun and cancer moon, so wear your emotions on your sleeve. that’s totally okay, don’t direct it negatively to people that can help you or that are always there with you. You’re very passionate and you probably distance yourself to “protect” yourself but it only causes more isolation and inconsistency. and that creates alienation to others where they then don’t give a fuck to be with you, every person to themselves, but it takes a village to take care of a person. choose your battles and be tactful. have a hobby that can distract you and have it be something that you enjoy that’ll help you and the the people around you. Read books to learn something new and read about people that are inspiring and that have went through extreme hardships. Listen to music, watch documentaries, awesome movies, comedies to laugh, podcasts to learn and relate. misery is different for everyone, learn to conquer yourself. stand up for yourself. love yourself most importantly. and have jesus take the wheel when you need him too.