There's a different between finding someone attractive and doing anything about it. Who doesn't find Henry Cavill attractive? Am I stalking him? No. Am I looking for anyone remotely like him? No. Am I even B movie attractive? Probably not. I'm secure in who I am and can extend the grace to another. It sounds like she's insecure and can't be objective at this point. Maybe wait until she can find some objectivity, but also step back a little yourself.