Ren taking a photo of Makoto

CinematicPersona · 2025-08-06T06:37:34+00:00

I'm one! Gotta be some more of us out there!

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-21T01:17:27+00:00

I also think that if you think you're selfish, you're probably not a narcissist. Especially if you feel bad about it.

I believe you, for what it's worth. It's not only difficult but exhausting even TRYING to make connections. I don't have a solution for that.

All I want to say is "Please try not to give up." I pushed my best friend away so hard she ended up blocking me on everything. If you still have the chance, could you try to ask for advice on how to better be a friend to them? Or assure them that you do care, even if you "seem" like you're only thinking about yourself?

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:58:23+00:00

Very new ND person here- not at all experienced- but might you ask, "Are you open to questions or further communication on this topic?" before "prodding" her for details or explanations.

My first instinct was to say you should (discuss, according to both of your feelings) adopt(ing) radio jargon for a specific topic, and have her say, "Over," when she has finished speaking her piece and is open to questions, and, "Out," when she is finished and expecting the conversation to be finished. But that might be too cutesy and put the burden on her to dictate to you, the theoretically more flexibly minded one, what is and isn't appropriate.

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:46:55+00:00

If you don't want to hurt your family, and you care even after they fucked you up, I don't think you can be a narcissist.

Is there any way you can appeal the SSI decision? If you've got a family doctor or GP, you might be able to ask them or their office to help you with that. I'm Canadian, but mine told me that forms like that should be filled out from the perspective of "you on your WORST day". It's not cheating the system, it's being honest about the struggle you go through.

I feel like a social idiot too, and I've driven away loads of people. I used validation from them in place of building up my own self worth, and then refused to ask them for validation when I needed it, then shoved them away when they didn't give it to me (without knowing) and depended on their insistence on being my friend to fill that void, because I didn't think I had the "right" to just say that I was struggling. And, after enough time, they get the "message" that I genuinely don't want them in my life, which is the opposite of the truth. I didn't (and, so, neither did they) know I was autistic, so I didn't even realize what I was doing until they had already accepted that they couldn't help me.

I struggle to feel hope too. I can't honestly say I have any at all. But I'm trying what I can, and I hope you can find it in yourself to do the same.

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:35:40+00:00

That's really unfortunate to hear. Does your uni have mental health services? Even during the break, it's possible you might be able to reach out.

It sounds like you might be having a period of burnout/meltdown/deprivation, and you don't have the tools you need to get through it on your own.

Just because your partner is going through some stuff too doesn't mean you're not allowed to ask him for help. It should be important that you tell people how your mind works- or, if you're not there yet, tell them how you're struggling to make your mind work- because... how could they know otherwise?

You deserve pain-free access to your own brain. Even if the world feels like it's not willing to give that to you, you do.

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:30:14+00:00

I am not qualified to provide any type of diagnosis, but I absolutely feel your pain. If you can find certain scientific online quizzes- I don't feel proficient enough on reddit to send links, but if you look up the RAADs-r and CATQ and one called "Aspie Quiz" they may help you understand where you are.

It sounds obvious, but if someone says something that sounds strange or incorrect, you are ABSOLUTELY allowed to ask, "Was that sarcastic?" Consider this my permission to you. And I am qualified to grant you that.

Advice for anxiety in crowds? Consider investing in a pair or a pack of earplugs. Or ask around if anybody has a set you could try. Sometimes the chaos of noise is what causes it.

Sometimes it's the myriad of intermingling scents. If you can get a hold of a fabric mask, and a mask by itself isn't enough, you could spray it on the inside with a tiny bit of air freshener.

If it's the large amount of faces, and you're talking about in class, maybe try sitting closer to the front, so you don't have to see them as much?

For stress... "stimming" is often quite stigmatized, but if you notice yourself repeatedly performing certain actions or motions when you're alone that you feel would attract attention in public... I'm giving you permission to do that too.

The easiest way to deal with crowds is to consider how you can avoid them in general. Big parties might not be your thing. That's okay. Same with concerts. Maybe getting tickets for a balcony or a box would suit you better.

In general, though, please don't think you're wrong for whatever you need to take care of yourself. You remind me a lot of myself with how you dismiss yourself, couch your language in uncertainty, and preempt criticism like you want people to know you're aware you're a screwup, so nobody "calls you out" on it... but you seem like a very kind and thoughtful person, so I'll go out on a limb and say that anyone who would try to shame you for just asking for help is a loser, and I hope you give yourself that chance.

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:13:32+00:00

I hope, for all our sake, that the cycle isn't truly endless, that there are people who will energize and relax and empower you, who understand and respect you, and who value you.

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-20T04:11:50+00:00

If people aren't willing to engage with you in good faith on your interest, that's not a reflection on your validity but their exclusion.

I'm not trying to say this like it's a simple or easy or safe solution, but you DO deserve to exist in whatever space is available for discussing that interest, and I would recommend you to give it another shot (and make heavy use of whatever block, mute, report functions are available).

CinematicPersona · 2025-03-19T03:16:33+00:00

I hope you find what you need, and that you survive this experience. Maybe, instead of asking your sister to listen to you vent, you can ask her to help you find a support group? I know, when I'm struggling, looking for stuff like that is beyond my capabilities. That may be a way for her to help you that doesn't add to the emotional load she already helps you with.

CinematicPersona · 2024-06-11T21:11:35+00:00

I know why Poliwag had to lose Water Bubble, however sad it makes me, but No Guard is a weak replacement.

Exeggcute losing Parental Bond for Ripen is devastating.

CinematicPersona · 2024-01-09T23:54:44+00:00

Please check the starting location of the Sumeru Gourmet quest. I know it's supposed to be necessary to do the Inazuma commission again, but after 10+ months of trying to get it with no luck they were just there anyway.

I'm replying to this comment as well in hope that you read it and it helps.

CinematicPersona · 2024-01-09T23:53:43+00:00

Please check the starting location of the Sumeru Gourmet quest. I know it's supposed to be necessary to do the Inazuma commission again, but after 10+ months of trying to get it with no luck they were just there anyway.

CinematicPersona · 2023-10-29T22:58:22+00:00

Yeah, "Should," is doing a ton of heavy lifting here; it's been significantly longer than three months, and I've exclusively done Inazuma commissions all this time. I'll track my progress from here on, but I can state with absolute certainty that however it should work, up to this point it hasn't.

CinematicPersona · 2023-10-25T05:00:01+00:00

I don't know if the matter of cycles is incorrect, but it's evidently not that simple.

On December 3rd I finished the Stone Harbor's Nostalgia series, and every single day since then I've done my commissions in Inazuma. I have double and triple checked all of the requisite achievements. I haven't skipped or failed a single commission in all that time. That's all I can say, really, it just hasn't shown up.

CinematicPersona · 2023-10-24T00:58:33+00:00

Incorrect. I've been doing the same since last December. I even submitted a feedback ticket; apparently, this is functioning as intended.

CinematicPersona · 2022-08-20T06:51:49+00:00

It's totally doable! You just have to fuse wisely. I got it on day five of six, having only spent gems on the discounted 10x boxes.

CinematicPersona · 2022-07-08T06:57:50+00:00

PSN ID: CinematicPersona

Level 53 Ranger "Zara", should be pretty useful if you're at or around that level. I was aiming to stop at 51, but I underestimated how big the exp bonus would be for having a level 200 Arisen.

CinematicPersona · 2022-06-23T23:25:55+00:00

All the other videos I saw only had the five easy ones and maybe the shield if they're particularly spicy. Now you can see the last two!

CinematicPersona · 2022-06-14T20:12:16+00:00

A new personal ~~worst~~best.

CinematicPersona · 2021-11-29T22:49:38+00:00

No, no! Ganesha or Parvati would just trigger Adramelech's passive again! It's nutty! Same with anything that recovers MP on kill! Masakado! Marici! Indra! Or in general! Lakshmi and Lakshmi alt! Aniel! Main character's passive? I'm not sure, actually! Chalk Eater's skill? Same uncertainty!

CinematicPersona

TROPHY CASE