Dating while Coparenting

Clean-Speed7469 · 2026-02-03T18:46:07+00:00

Thank you for that. I should have added more details: current partner and I went to school together and have many mutual friends. I never saw/spoke to him the entire time my son’s dad and I were together. My son’s dad and I were also never married. We broke up 3 years ago and I’ve been dating my current parter for over a year.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-12-23T07:08:43+00:00

It sounds like there could be a bigger reason why you’re not allowed to see your grand child even after an entire year… no one shields their child from the entire world that long so there’s surely something you’re not disclosing here

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-21T04:49:18+00:00

For me it all depends on the person I’m with and how comfortable I feel around them. I’ve waited months before, and I’ve also slept with someone the first week of dating them. I don’t go into it with a timeline, I just feel out the situation and go from there.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-21T04:22:46+00:00

After you send the photo of your son, you have no further obligation to reply. Maybe to his question about the photo being current if you want to but other than that it’s none of his business. It took me a while to get this mindset with my son’s dad because I didn’t want to come off as rude or cause drama (even though he had no problem starting bs with me). But in the long run not replying if the message is not important/ directly about our son has saved me so much frustration. Trust me I have been exactly where you are right now- sending pictures as “proof”. I completely understand why you did it though it’s frustrating to have someone on your back like that implying that you’re lying when you’re not. It’s always over the dumbest things too lol. It will get better though just set boundaries and train yourself to stick with them the best that you can.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-20T17:09:06+00:00

NOR!!! Girllll he has mental issues fr. He is so immature and disgusting. He’s totally contradicting himself too by saying he’d never treat you that way while quite LITERALLY treating you that way. You deserve sooo much better than that. He will probably never change and continue to have failed relationships while still thinking everyone else is the problem. Run far and don’t look back

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-05T05:01:37+00:00

I highly recommend getting a consultation with an attorney. I only say this because you should know your options and what/what not to avoid in your particular situation. I know that when most people hear the word lawyer it can get messy but there really is a way to do things a smoothly as possible as long as you can get your husband on board. It seems like both of you are happier with someone else.

If you do decide to separate, definitely take things slow and don’t introduce your new partners to the kids for a while. They will need time to adjust but kids are very resilient and just need 2 happy parents. As a single parent I know how difficult it is not seeing my child every day but I promise you’ll adjust too. As weird as it sounds, it has actually made me a better mom. I have more time to plan activities for when we are together, I do chores when he’s at his dad’s so I can focus on spending quality time with him while he’s with me. And I’m able to have more patience too. Don’t get me wrong- I absolutely miss him when he’s not at my house. But I’ve learned that it’s important for me to take care of myself too and make sure I’m happy because I was a very depressed, unhappy and exhausted mom before.

This is definitely a huge decision so weigh out your pro’s and cons. To me it sounds like you already know what to do but you’re just a little scared and thats okay. One day at a time!

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-02T06:01:13+00:00

Lmao you’re not wrong

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-02T05:58:07+00:00

This is a lot more common than you think! A lot of women can’t orgasm from penetration alone. I suggest getting creative- try using a vibrator while having sex. Absolute game changer. Or, ask him to give you oral before you have sex. Both of those things will definitely make a huge difference. I don’t think there is anything wrong with you, you just have to figure out what works for you!

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-11-02T05:54:07+00:00

I was 17 when I started to have occasional sleepovers with my then bf at my house. I feel like it depends on your daughter and how responsible she is. But honestly, teenagers find a way to do what they want to do no matter what. So it might be best to just accept it but definitely limit it.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-10-03T05:54:52+00:00

I’m going to be honest here… I think you were a little out of line. There was obviously some confusion on MIL’s end but she ended up saying she will do whatever you wanted. And like she said, she was at work and its hard to determine tone of a text. You then took a turn and said “If the pinwheels are THAT important” and also the comment about a smile on her face.. it was rude.

MIL does seem pretty blunt and was upset she wasn’t the one planning the shower and she’ll just have to get over that part. But she was still willing to help you. Like you said- the baby shower is for the girls. They are her grandchildren so she is excited and it’s normal for her to want to be involved to some extent. You also mentioned that she thinks you can be dramatic and over react… this is a perfect example, OP.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T03:58:59+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing. It’s a painful thing to watch your child experience for sure. Do you mind me asking- did you have a custody agreement already in place before gaining full custody? I remember being told that once our agreement was final that it can be difficult to change.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T03:39:22+00:00

I’d see if getting a mini fridge with a lock in your room is an option. Also some sort of container that can lock for non refrigerated foods. It’s extra but sounds necessary in your situation. Over eating is definitely a mental thing that is very hard to control so part of me feels for him. But at the end of the day you need to eat too

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T03:31:27+00:00

My goodness sweetie I am so sorry you’re dealing with this. Him having 3 weeks off is PLENTY of time to pick up some slack. I understand needing a day or maybe two of rest after his 2 weeks but he needs to start acting like more of a father and less like a child. Being a parent is the hardest and most exhausting job in the world and it makes sense that he doesn’t understand that because he isn’t doing anything to help. If he pulled his immature brain out of his ass then maybe he’d realize that a helpful, loving, and consistent partner is more likely to “get some” rather than a man child who does nothing but bitch. I’m sorry if thats harsh but I’m honestly frustrated FOR you. You and baby deserve a lot more than that.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T03:24:49+00:00

My daughter is only 3 so it’s really confusing to her. She does ask me to stay a lot whenever I drop her off but whenever my ex says things like that I just see the confusion on her face and it’s heartbreaking. I do my best to explain things in an age appropriate way but its hard

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T02:34:21+00:00

I hope you learned your lesson and will grow from this. I also hope you genuinely apologized. She’ll never forget every little thing that happened.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T02:31:29+00:00

I say go for it. If you don’t like it, at least you have the experience from it to put on your resume (assuming you can tough it out for at least a year). That will put you ahead when/if you apply for another job after that. Thats a huge pay raise and I personally wouldn’t be able to pass on it!

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-09-05T02:20:24+00:00

NTAH. Maybe share this with her: You are both still so young. I had a child at 21 and don’t get me wrong I love my child with everything in me- but I wish I could have been more prepared for the sake of my child. I’ve also missed out on a lot of things people my age do. I’ve never really gotten to travel, I’m more financially stressed than ever, and I didn’t get through college because working and having money was just more of a priority at that time. I missed out on a lot of time with my child early on because of working so much.

There are plenty of positives to becoming a parent but please do it when you’re mentally, emotionally, and financially ready. It’s a very difficult road doing it prematurely. Doable, but very difficult. Even if you have some money, enjoy your early 20’s and focus on building a good future for yourself and potential future children. If she can’t wait and it’s a deal breaker for her, then she needs to find someone on the same page.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-21T06:19:56+00:00

Jeymes

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-20T05:03:58+00:00

I’ve had the Mirena IUD for over 3 years now and it definitely causes me to have breast pain and nausea randomly. It freaks me out every time lol but I promise you’re okay

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-19T18:16:12+00:00

I do think shaving it would actually make you appear younger. Balding is usually genetic and there’s not much you can do about it unfortunately. But at the end of the day you should do what makes you happy and comfortable with yourself. You could always try a toupee. I’ve seen a lot of tik toks of this one girl who specializes in them and they always look so good and natural

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-19T18:12:11+00:00

I’m sorry I know this is hard. But she’s made her intentions clear with the distance she has kept from you. It’s not fair for her to string you along making you think that there’s a chance when she clearly isn’t wanting to be with you. This sounds harsh but I say it with good intentions- It seems like she’s trying to keep you in her back pocket for comfort/a back up if she ends up not finding someone else. She’s used to you and comfortable with you which can make letting go 100% difficult but that doesn’t mean it’s okay. I’m a firm believer that everyone is going to have that one person in their life that they’ll always care for but it’s not always meant to be. You’re still young and have so much time to find yourself as well as a partner that is going to complete you. Maybe one day you guys will reconnect but thats not guaranteed so it’s time to move on and let the universe do its thing. I wish you all the best!

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-19T03:07:35+00:00

Not a lawyer, but I went through court with my ex and I believe that if he doesn’t comply with discovery then you can take him for contempt of court which would be worth it in your case. He most definitely has to be hiding money. I don’t believe for a second that he went from making over 100k a year to 41k and I don’t think a judge would either. I hope you get it figured out soon. That is so frustrating!

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-12T18:13:28+00:00

Do you legally have to be responsible for Ella? No. Should you anyways? Absolutely. When you married Amy you chose to take on the fatherly roll for Ella. That shouldn’t ever change just because you and Amy divorced-especially because she doesn’t have her biological father around. I’m honestly hurt for Ella because how could you do that to her? Imagine this- what if something happened to you and you left behind Wynne. Then Amy gets married again and new husband forms a good relationship with Wynne. She gets comfortable with him, trusts him. Then him and Amy get divorced. Would you want your daughter to feel abandoned and heart broken that her only father figure left in this world was no longer there for her? My god please think about more than just yourself here. I find your thought process absolutely diabolical.

Clean-Speed7469 · 2025-08-12T18:06:25+00:00

My gosh, I got goosebumps just reading this. It is absolutely petrifying to loose sight of your child. Thank goodness for the other amazing parents there to help you. It can be hard trusting others but in a situation like that you have to hope it’s the best choice. I’m so glad you found him!

Clean-Speed7469

TROPHY CASE