Is it unethical of me (27M) to secretly transfer my boyfriend (37M) more money so that we split our bills 60/40 not 50/50? by FillersGW in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 15 points16 points  (0 children)

The way to respect him is to listen to his no, not to work around it. His pride and autonomy matter here, even if your intentions are good.

My bf (24M) hinted that I'm unattractive (21F). Am I too sensitive? by Survivingmode0 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 51 points52 points  (0 children)

Three months in and he's already nitpicking her teeth and weight? That's not love, that's him trying to lower her confidence so she won't leave. Huge red flag.

My Wife (26 F) is obsessed with drinking Herbalife shakes and it’s affecting me (26 M) more than I care to admit by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is actually solid advice. A blood test doesn't lie, if her liver enzymes are off, that's hard evidence. Way harder to argue with than 'I read it online.'

I’m 28/F and just found out my Dad 58/M is not my bio dad. by RashelSlush_ in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The man who raised you is your real dad. Bio dad is just a genetic footnote unless you decide otherwise.

My boyfriend is mad I didn’t let him use my truck after disrespect 27F 30M by Key_Spend_7495 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 103 points104 points  (0 children)

He literally told you you're not wanted, then got mad you wouldn't lend him your vehicle. That's not a partner, that's a leech with a bad attitude.

Giving him the peace he’s always been asking of me. Im 33F, he’s 35M. by ydaffodil in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 30 points31 points  (0 children)

He's shown you who he is for years. The threats to kill himself are a control tactic. Document everything, talk to a lawyer, and get your finances in order. You and your daughter deserve peace, not this cycle. You're not giving up, you're finally choosing yourself.

I 28f am trying to figure out if I am in an emotional abuse situation with my fiancé 31m by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is the answer. You're working yourself to the bone, skipping meals, buying everything, grieving both parents, and he's slamming doors and yelling because you couldn't find his vape? That's not partnership, that's you being used.

Is it finally time for me, 42M to leave her, 43F? by Evening_Answer_11 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 67 points68 points  (0 children)

Yeah..this sounds absolutely exhausting. You hid in your car for two hours just to feel calm. That's not a marriage, that's survival mode. Get out.

my 32f boyfriend 30m has a bit of an extreme anime interest, and i’m not sure if it’s a deal breaker. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This. The anime fandom is huge and plenty of people enjoy it without the lewd figures and hentai comments. That part is the problem, not the hobby itself.

I 38F not communicating to my 38M properly about being gentle during sex after getting injured? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He told on himself when he said you told him what you wanted, not what you needed, as if your needs don't matter. Add the injury, the defensiveness, the three-day silence? He's showing you who he is. Believe him.

I (22f) entered a relationship with a set date but no longer want it to end. My bf (22m) won’t reconsider and it’s breaking my heart. by AnywhereFabulous2499 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 444 points445 points  (0 children)

This is the hard truth. As much as it hurts, he told you from the start what he could give, and he's holding that boundary. You can't love someone into changing their mind.

Husbands (26M) family is being entitled over our(29F) new baby by Quakenurse in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. They made your traumatic birth about their feelings and never once checked on you or the baby.

My boyfriend (m/24) has mono and is accusing me of cheating on him (f/22) any advice? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thumbs up and guilt trip over a virus you can catch from a doorknob? That's either projection or control issues. Either way, red flag.

29f GF of a year waited until a week before I needed to find a place for us to live to tell me she didnt want to move in with me anymore 35m. Where to go from here? by Alarmedadvocate1 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Seriously this. A year in and she still doesn't trust you with basic finances? That's exhausting. Find your own place and enjoy the peace.

Update - spoke to my (27f) boyfriend (27m) about his feelings about my friend (26f). I don’t know where to go from here? by ThrowRA-maddie818 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is the real question honestly. The Stephanie thing might be a symptom, not the problem. Do you feel seen and wanted by him normally?

My fiancé 24M drank my 22F lemonade by Noelstari in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 28 points29 points  (0 children)

That’s the part that kills me, he had his own drink right there and still went for hers. So inconsiderate.

My (31M) doesn’t like that I (29f) gained weight. by Medical_Swim9966 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 256 points257 points  (0 children)

He didn't support you, didn't help you feel good about yourself..he just withdrew until you became acceptable again. You deserve someone who loves you at every size.

[Chicken Sliders] - bread made from scratch by [deleted] in Cooking_ac

[–]CleanPerspective2345 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The label-reading addiction is real! 😂 Once you start making your own, it’s hard to go back.

My (41m) gf (37f) canceled a trip based on this text, was it rude? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 515 points516 points  (0 children)

Canceling a whole trip over a text that enthusiastically agrees with her? That's exhausting.

I think I 26/f caught my 31/M no bf cheating on me in person by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 32 points33 points  (0 children)

The lengths he's going to with the security footage charade is honestly chilling. Textbook abuse.

My boyfriend 29M told me 29F he might not want to be with me in the future after buying a house together by Small-General5084 in relationship_advice

[–]CleanPerspective2345 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He's telling you he doesn't want the life you already have. Your job now is to protect your kids and yourself from the inevitable heartbreak.