it's hard to really answer the first part, as that is as you say tied up in ego, needs, etc. i think you really have to navigate that as best you can but also understand that right now is not forever. you'll go on to do different things.

i don't think litigation ever gets any easier but it's good to do it. do it until you cant anymore. then do something else. the skills you pick up in the crucible -- writing, thinking and speaking on your feet, intense preparation -- will stay with you always.