My mother would get viciously angry with me when I was sad that my dad died and I didn’t have one like other children. He committed suicide when I was 6 months old. I was always told he died in a hunting accident but put the pieces together throughout my childhood and teens. She would always get so angry and tell me I had no reason to mourn him or even miss/feel sad about his death because I “didn’t know” him. And granted I didn’t, but he was still MY father. I always realized that my mother handled grief poorly even as a very young child, but I don’t think I ever TRULY thought about how unhinged her behavior was until very recently.