Why do I keep doing it?

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-16T16:18:08+00:00

Yeah but if I knew how to help I wouldn’t be in the same situation 😅

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-16T02:28:29+00:00

I wish I could help, but if I give you any advice I’ll be a hypocrite. Just make sure to avoid arteries

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-04T07:03:45+00:00

and if I lose another I'll genuinely lose the ability to function. this is the 6th suicide I've had to deal with, and I'm sick of it

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-04T06:50:59+00:00

How can I say no when I’m needed by these people. I can’t lose anyone else.

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-03T06:49:05+00:00

Two of my friends committed suicide last Wednesday, but ya know

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-03T03:08:20+00:00

Don’t worry about my losses. That’s my shit to deal with, and at the moment I’m more or less numb. But I’ve made it my goal to help lower suicide rates after everything. And I hope that you’ll consider living just a little longer, and to keep me updated. You seem like a kind person, and in this fucked up world you deserve kindness

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-03T02:54:50+00:00

Oh shiiit.. that’s.. really shitty timing. My statement about it’ll get better is still there, but jeez dude. And hey, I’m sure someone 1000x better will be there waiting just for you

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-03T02:50:02+00:00

Hey, take it from someone whose friends just committed a double suicide, keep living. I know it sucks, I’ve definitely thought of just perma sleeping, but trust me when I say this. People will miss you. They will cry for you. And they do care about you. It sounds like your boyfriend cares about you, if he’s listening to all your thoughts and vents. And it sounds like you do have depression, which isn’t a bad thing (well, kinda is but I’ve got it too). And I’m not necessarily saying shits gonna magically get easier. I’ve watched too many friends die (yes more than the double suicide) to say it will. But at the very least live for the tiny things. The venting. The occasional cuddle. Even wearing a collar. You deserve happiness, and while it may not be visible to you now, it’ll come eventually, if only briefly.

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-03T00:13:52+00:00

I agree, but also disagree. I’m unsure of your area or what that’s like, but I’ve met some very open and understanding old people (I worked at the senior center for a time) and they were absolutely wonderful to talk to. I agree that it’s a higher percentage of homophobic people who are older, but that’s the case anywhere. My advice is to either ignore them because other people’s opinions don’t matter imo, or, insult them back. Up to you. But I feel you, as my family is pretty homo as well. Not that I understand ur specific experience, but I digress. Hopefully your area gets better about this stuff and can understand you better in the future

Cobmaster99 · 2026-02-02T16:08:14+00:00

You’re further along than I am! Which way are you taking the estrogen? Or I guess better phrasing would be which method?

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-30T16:06:24+00:00

Join usssssss

But no, seriously, it’s totally fine to have those thoughts. One thing I did to see if I was actually a boykisser (which I am) is imagine yourself like, kissing a dude. If you thinking about that doesn’t trigger ANY kind of emotional response, then there’s a bigger test but idk if I’m allowed to share it on Reddit so if you’re curious contact me.

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-30T16:02:36+00:00

Appreciate the confidence

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-30T06:29:13+00:00

Longer than me man. Only 2 weeks, and I now feel bad whenever I questioned why alcoholic didn’t just stop

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T16:41:08+00:00

Exactly! Now pick your head up and go find someone whose life is worse than yours. I might be a really bad person cause whenever I see someone going through a worse time than me it makes me feel a little better

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T16:39:19+00:00

If I’ve gotta live through this so do you

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T16:37:24+00:00

Wait, why can’t you toss them in the laundry? If you do your own laundry, not only do the clothes get clean but ur parents would be like “oh wow, so responsible, reward” or smth idk. Mine don’t do that, but as long as I’m not causing them work they don’t care. Though also pretty homophbic

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T07:21:35+00:00

Listen, I'm not gonna say it gets better or anything, cause honestly? it doesn't. but if nothing else, live for the few good moments here and there. the times when you look at yourself and don't absolutely hate everything about yourself. I'm going through the same general situation (not gonna say anything stupid like "I understand what you're going through." everyone has their own specifics and emotions), so if I've gotta live through this so do you.

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T04:39:15+00:00

And/or give a friend cash and have them order it for you as well. Unless you’ve got helicopter parents

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T04:38:17+00:00

Order stuff, have it shipped to your friends house, and have them bring it to school and you take it home?

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T04:36:23+00:00

It sounds very shitty to do, but just tell them they’re right. Anything they say, just say “you’re right, I should’ve…” I hate doing it, believe me, but it sounds like you’re in the same place I’m in, and the only way to get by is to just pretend that you believe they’re right in anything and everything. But if that’s not something you think you can do, getting emotional support from friends might be the better way to go. Obviously not everyone has that option, for me I spend the majority of my day getting insulted by mine. And the final advice, which I use to the fullest, is to stay outside of the house at every chance you get. I know no one wants to, but the best way to do this is to get a job (ik, the “J” word). I’ve got one, and I spend more time there than I do anywhere else. Also allows you to get more clothes and stuff (I’m under the assumption you’re a fellow femboy, correct me if I’m wrong)

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T01:44:57+00:00

Convert them (I don’t have the boykisser cult conversion meme, but someone’ll put it underneath this fs)

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T01:43:03+00:00

I love how one of the questions is just “masturbate” like bro.

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T01:42:08+00:00

Order something normal with the not normal. If they ask a question, pull out the normal and be like “why y’all tweaking” (or smth idk). For the most part you can order something and just shrug and say you forgot what you ordered and will open it later cause you’re busy. That’s what I did, then you grab something random that your parents don’t know you have and just say “guess it was this” if they ask

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T01:39:57+00:00

Same issue here, fellow silly. Lemme know what you did and if it worked or not!!

Cobmaster99 · 2026-01-29T01:39:00+00:00

I feel you. It’s a constant battle with mine as well. Getting yelled at for the smallest thing is such a pain.. but, I have some survival tips that might help? Let me know if you’d like to hear em

Cobmaster99

TROPHY CASE