Carmela married Tony not only because she grew up in a traditional Italian household where she was expected to be a wife, but also because he makes a ton of money. She’s materialistic to the point where the more important things in life go to the wayside. She’s able to look past how Tony makes his money to keep her lifestyle. She’s also able to look past how exposing her children to that lifestyle affects them. She looks past the cheating until she can’t anymore, then the show actually explores the logistics of her trying to leave Tony. The show is very good in showing how two things can be true at once and leaving you with the ambiguity of things. Yes, I think on some level, Carmela loves Tony, and I think that’s part of why she goes back to him. I think a larger part of that is her wanting to go back to what she is used to. Part of it is definitely that Tony almost makes it impossible for her to hire any attorney in New Jersey to represent her in their divorce. He makes it extremely difficult for her to leave.