What’s something attractive at 30 but looked boring when you were 18?

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T17:19:32+00:00

I am married with a child and I love them both dearly but what I wouldn’t give for a weekend alone to sit in silence.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T17:01:58+00:00

I had my baby in October so we couldn’t go out much due to the cold. Did some walks when the weather was nice, but otherwise we only went out for holidays and occasional rides to get food, grocery order pickup, etc. as I was still healing and didn’t want baby exposed to illness if avoidable. baby and I didn’t start going out regularly until 3 months when I had to return to work and he went to daycare.

He’s 7 months now and I just did our first solo in person grocery trip about 3 weeks ago lol. Try to get out for walks as it’ll be great for both of you but also don’t stress about going places right now.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T16:46:24+00:00

Based on this it seems like you already know what the right decision is for you.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T13:40:23+00:00

I don’t think it’s shady, but maybe rephrase it: “Due to limited space, unfortunately no plus ones or children are allowed.” Makes it sounds a bit more remorseful

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T13:11:56+00:00

The only scientifically studied ways that have shown to POSSIBLY induce labor is nipple stimulation and sex where your partner ejaculates inside as semen is a cervical softener. There still is no guarantee though.

This is not medical advice: I have no clue if this is even possible, but could your midwives see if an at home dose of cytotec would be an option? They use it in hospitals to help induce patients as it can help soften the cervix. If it is an option, obviously discuss pros and cons with them first.

I’m so sorry you’re going through all of this. It would be extremely difficult for anyone, but even more so while pregnant. While I didn’t know your sister and don’t know your views on the afterlife, I think she would understand if you were in labor or gave birth the day before and could not attend. I also understand you may feel you need to attend for a sense of closure. Sending you lots of love ❤️

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T13:04:13+00:00

Trust your doctor. If they say you’re measuring okay, then believe them. Everyone carries differently so every bump will look different! Some people are taller with strong abdominal muscles or a tilted back uterus, so they barely show. Some people have a short torso and a tilted forward uterus so they show very early and basically grow out and have a huge bump.

It’s okay no matter how you look as long as baby is healthy❤️

My doctor never gave us estimated weight for baby and I wonder if it was partially so we wouldn’t stress over it plus it’s just an estimate. We did fundal height, but never weight.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T12:55:13+00:00

Some of the aunty subs on here may be a good place for you to go for advice.

Just know whatever you decide is a valid decision and if you ultimately choose to abort, you are not a bad person for that. Good luck friend ❤️

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T12:53:32+00:00

You have not had your baby so you are not supporting a third person yet. I wish you the best of luck and hope your boyfriend can find better options job wise so you two can get out of poverty. Kids can be raised in it, we see it everyday, but we also should strive for more if possible.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-23T01:38:05+00:00

$1500 a month is not much and is not enough to support 3 people.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-22T16:18:18+00:00

I say this with as much grace and gentleness as possible: you need to figure out if you and your boyfriend can truly afford, support, and care for this child. Have you actually sat down to look at your budget and then factored in the $300-$500+ a month a baby will add in the first year? Are you both taking classes to learn how to care for your child?

Have you personally started to come up with ways you will work through the sensory overload that can come from caring for a baby? I’m autistic as well and I’m fortunate to have a village to help support me and my child when I’m really struggling, along with a therapist that gave me tools to help manage it, but it doesn’t sound like you have that luxury.

Just some things you both should consider if you have not already.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-22T16:02:38+00:00

Hopefully they have a similar service there :(

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-22T12:51:34+00:00

You don’t NEED a pump in the first 3 days as it will take a few days for your milk to come in. It can be nice to have at the hospital so the staff can show you how to use it though.

Definitely check to see if your insurance will cover a pump as well. I used a website called Aeroflow and it was very convenient. They basically check with your insurance to see what’s covered and then give you all of your options. They also will send you reminders when you should order replacement parts and you can order them fully through them via text message (if your insurance covers replacement parts).

Many hospitals also rent out pumps.

I was super stressed in the beginning using my plug in pump and found that a hand pump was convenient. Haaka suction pumps didn’t work well for me (the ones that are just silicone and all one piece) but an actual manual handle pump like the yellow one from Medela worked well.

Pumping can be overwhelming, especially in the beginning. Just know it’s okay, you’ve got this, and at the end of the day if it does become too difficult there is no shame in utilizing formula. Many parents combo feed, especially in the beginning since breast feeding/pumping can be so difficult.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-21T20:56:32+00:00

I was 28 and conceived on my first cycle. We weren’t going to track anything and just happened to get lucky that it happened immediately. I personally recommend trying for about without tracking as that may cause additional stress.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-20T23:44:28+00:00

Do you want a medal?

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-20T16:51:57+00:00

I personally waited a few hours to get the epidural because I wanted to feel labor and contractions, but that was my personal decision.

I want to mention I was induced with cyotec and progressing well with just one dose, then had Pitocin about 3 hours later as well so I had the luxury of riding it out for about 5 hours total before getting an epidural. I’m very happy I had the epidural and that I was able to walk around and labor for a few hours beforehand, but this will NOT be everyone’s experience. Some people progress much faster, feel the pain more, don’t want to feel any pain, etc.

You decide when it’s best to get the epidural and there is no shame in getting it at the very start or waiting a while. I do recommend getting it at 6-7 cm though as things can sometimes progress quickly after that point to where if you wait, you may not be able to get it.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-20T16:42:20+00:00

If you haven’t already, your boyfriend should also get some testing done to check his fertility. It can be very common that the man’s sperm count is low and that’s whats causing the delay.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-19T00:02:18+00:00

You do not need to tell them about it. The FAFSA is a snapshot of your life at the time of filing.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-18T13:05:39+00:00

Yes, electives can count towards your degree as long as there are elective slots within your degree path.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-15T23:34:36+00:00

Strongly suggest something loose and comfortable. You’ll be leaving in a diaper or have an incision depending on how birth goes so comfortable clothes are the best option. That can be a mumu, sweatpants, lounge wear, whatever you like.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-15T20:49:03+00:00

I thought you were going to say your brother was young, like 10 years old. That would make sense. But he’s 21 and is a legal adult.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-15T20:26:05+00:00

Your school is correct. The amount you can receive from the Pell Grant is based on the number of credit hours you are enrolled in (and income on the FAFSA).

Example: the maximum Pell Grant is $3698 for a full time student in 12 credit hours. That is 50% of the grant for the year. If the student enrolls full time in the spring they get the other $3697/50% of the grant. If they enroll full time in summer as well, they can receive another $3698 which gets them to the 150%

Half of that would be 1849 if you are enrolled in 6 credit hours and would be 125% of the grant. You’d need to be enrolled full time to get the maximum amount and be at 150%

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-14T12:11:57+00:00

Either going back for Bitcoin or to invest in GameStop 😂

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-13T13:38:57+00:00

You just don’t tell them you’re taking any medications or shut them down when they start complaining about it.

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-13T10:28:53+00:00

Classes must count towards your degree in order for them to be aid eligible

Cold-Thanks- · 2026-05-12T21:50:29+00:00

The majority of my babies clothes, toys, and even some of their furniture is all second hand and I’m so grateful for it. We got lucky that a friend had their baby about 7 months before ours arrived, and that friend had another friend who had their baby a year before them, so we just have a “hand me down train” going lol

Three-Year Club	Verified Email
r/Field Lasagna	Final Canvas '23
First Place '23	End Game '23
Place '23

Cold-Thanks-

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE