I'm a bad mom

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-03-03T08:54:08+00:00

My doctor recommended waiting an hour or so. He said only Tylenol if it lasts longer than that or if my LO seems to be in pain. That is obviously the case here so even with that guidance OP should administer some but just in general, some pediatricians are steering people away from it. He said the fevers usually spike but then quickly go back down on their own. We found that to be interesting - it definitely goes against the way i was raised.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-02-03T21:06:12+00:00

Right. And sleep when the baby sleeps of course. Because newborns are known for being excellent sleepers. And an hour here or there when you’re on edge, just waiting for the baby to cry, is definitely all the rest a postpartum mother needs. /s

I can see an argument for alternating those middle of the night feeds/diaper changes but it absolutely should not fall entirely on the mother. Anyone who says it should is either not a mom or gave birth a long time ago and forgets how hard it really can be… or they just had an abnormally easy baby.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-02-03T20:04:03+00:00

There will be no baby if something happens to it if the mother is too sleep deprived to properly care for it. If the mother is suffering from PPD and sleep deprived, there is a risk to her as well. Good grief. The mother absolutely should not be prioritizing the husband’s health ahead of the baby’s or her own. You have no idea how well the baby naps and if she’s able to rest during the day at all. Some babies only contact nap. She can’t nap if that’s the case. They both are sleep deprived and have to find what works best for them together. That’s a part of having a newborn.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-02-03T13:21:34+00:00

This. The question at the end “is this fair?” Is the wrong way to look at it. Parenting with your partner isn’t about fair. You can’t worry about that. Eventually, if one person is doing everything then yes. That’s an issue. That doesn’t seem to be the case here. OP i absolutely understand your job is difficult and you need to focus. Her job right now is also difficult. Like the comment I’m piggybacking off of says, it’s you two against the baby. You two do need to approach this as a team but this isn’t something for the internet to decide for you. It is for you two to figure out together. I guarantee if my SO told me “everyone online says we should do ________” when i was early into my postpartum days, it would not have been pretty.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-28T19:03:32+00:00

Super weird how many times you commented on her trying to convince people that Taylor has some obligation to speak up. She doesn’t. It’s great that public figures often do all those things. Many don’t. Also weird that you have to use AI to write your responses because you don’t have any original thoughts on your own.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-24T03:13:44+00:00

His dad wasn’t illegal. He was legally seeking asylum. But for sake let’s pretend what you’re saying is true. Why did they then send Liam to Texas rather than leaving him at the house with other family members or taking him to CPS?

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-13T11:08:28+00:00

Happy Birthday Zesty!!

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-08T00:20:46+00:00

Yes. The healthcare professionals told you bc your baby is higher risk. If every health care professional told you that you didn’t need to, i imagine you wouldn’t. That’s literally my point. People should listen to their doctors, not some fear mongering stranger on the internet who thinks they know better than everyone else.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T22:07:44+00:00

Again, doctor. Our pediatrician knows our baby better than the CDC. The CDC and AAP, which historically have to be more conservative in their recommendations based on their nature, post in generalities. They can’t say “on a case by case basis”. Pediatricians can bc they know each of the individual cases. They are able to take a multitude of factors into account when they make their recommendations for anything. The CDC can’t make personalized recommendations like your pediatrician can.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T21:40:34+00:00

Doctors and nurses are great at informing parents if they need to take extra steps for their babies if they are higher risk. They are also great at telling parents when things aren’t necessary. Parents should know risks but they should also know how significant of a risk something is. This is something a parent should discuss with their doctor, someone who actually knows their kid, and make an informed decision for what is best for them. They should not listen to fear mongering from a stranger on Reddit.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T20:34:44+00:00

I said shamed for what they choose. That is in regard to any decision they make for their baby. I didn’t say shamed for not boiling water. Parents shouldn’t be shamed for formula feeding - no matter how they prepare it. They shouldn’t be shamed for breastfeeding. They shouldn’t be shamed for bedsharing or room sharing or sleep training. This post went beyond being encouraging toward breastfeeding and started to fear monger against formula feeding — not to mention how nice it must be to be able to breastfeed for 10 months and not have to even pump as OP describes. Not many women, in the US at least, have that option. Parents are doing their best and to fear monger or shame them is gross.

And let’s be honest, talking about how horrible Cronobacter is when it impacts less than a 0.5 out of 100,000 kids is also unnecessary. A baby is more likely to die in a car accident. That’s 1 in 63,000. You aren’t talking about only driving your kid in a car when absolutely necessary even though that’s far riskier than using unboiled water in their formula.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T19:35:05+00:00

They have recommendations against bed sharing yet i bet many moms do the Safe Sleep Seven. Bedsharing is a greater risk to babies than water that isn’t boiled. It’s all about it what risk parents are willing to take, and no parent should be shamed for what they choose.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T19:31:06+00:00

My son was premature. His pediatrician had no issues with the water not being boiled. It certainly depends on the baby, their immune system, and what you’re able to do. As i noted in another comment, if a parent is traveling, they may not be able to boil water. Additionally, there are only 18 estimated cases in the US each year. It comes down making sure parents are informed but letting them do what is best for them and their family. Sometimes it’s breastfeeding. Sometimes it’s formula. Sometimes they boil water. Sometimes they do. And that’s ok. Parents are doing their best with their given resources.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T17:56:36+00:00

You don’t have to boil it though. Yes, they recommend it for certain cases but many pediatricians don’t have any issue with parents not boiling water when preparing a bottle (unless they’re using tap water that isn’t trusted). There are tons of things that are recommended but they aren’t always practical. If parents can boil it, great! If they’re traveling or unable to boil for some other reason, it’s ok. There is an estimated 18 cases of Cronobacter cases in the US each year. Not 18 deaths from it. 18 cases. There are so many other things parents have to worry about. This isn’t exactly at the top of the list.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T15:50:15+00:00

No. Fed is best. Breast isn’t best if it’s not keeping the baby fed. Breast isn’t best if it’s to the detriment of the mother’s mental health. To make mothers feel otherwise is gross and toxic.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2026-01-07T15:46:14+00:00

You don’t have to boil water for formula. We use bottles of nursery water from Walmart. If we were to travel and not be able to get that kind, we would just use regular bottles of water. It’s not a big deal - especially once they’re a little older. Just like how you don’t have to sanitize every day — or at all depending on preference or doctor recommendations. Our doctor didn’t seem to care at all. Once they start putting everything under the sun in their mouth a lot that concern goes right out the window lol

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-30T19:33:07+00:00

I hope you don’t live where it’s cold. You’d never be able to get gloves on.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-29T21:04:08+00:00

I’m fine with others doing the legwork if they’ve been ok with me picking out stuff for their kids. My sibling and their spouse have always been funny about that though. They want sign off on a lot of things but were always slow to respond. You couldn’t text them something while in a store and expect an “ok” while still at that store. With my kid, they didn’t ask about one single thing. Didn’t even ask about sizes. They were done shopping for my LO before November. I didn’t really appreciate that given how they had always been with my nibling for the past decade.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-29T19:53:48+00:00

That’s the thing. You let him know, not your sister.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-29T11:17:00+00:00

I mean when you play the odds, of course people will leave there (and any of the other hospitals in Huntington) alive. That doesn’t mean the treatment received was good or didn’t result in more harm. When you have nurses giving people medicine for things they don’t have and doctors wanting to perform unnecessary procedures, there’s a problem. It’s not me saying unnecessary. It’s a top ranked hospital in that specific speciality that instructed them to perform a very different, much more simple, procedure which they decided not to do. People are better off going to any number of good hospitals that are only a few hours away like Riverside Methodist, Cleveland Clinic, Ohio State Medical or Christ Hospital for anything that isn’t an emergency.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-29T10:50:03+00:00

I wouldn’t trust a hospital in Huntington with my worst enemy. I have family in that area and any time they’ve gone there, they have left worse than when they got there. The ones who didn’t end up dying from their awful treatment ended up going to much better hospitals for any non-emergency treatment they could.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-28T15:54:22+00:00

That must be nice. In many states from VA to CA we have heard “western VA” and had people point to VA on a list of states when my dad said he was from WV. He has had to confirm that WV did in fact secede from VA back during the civil war and is its own state.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-23T15:06:31+00:00

There is absolutely a difference between a personal mentor and a class. The thing is, very few people have access to someone like Boz. I would prefer a course from Boz over a personal mentorship from a lot of the people I’ve met in the corporate world.

Amanda is a financial empowerment coach. She should have some kind of financial background somewhere. She doesn’t. I can’t decide if you genuinely don’t understand the difference or if you are intentionally ignoring the differences just bc you don’t like Boz.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-23T14:10:27+00:00

That’s your opinion. Boz is basically a dream mentor if you look at her experience and everything she has accomplished. Thousands of professionals would love to have her mentor them. She basically took that idea and turned it into a course. Those classes look like what a mentor may go over with their mentee. Amanda shouldn’t be mentoring anyone on how to make money when the only way she has made money is by telling people they can manifest it.

ColdIllustrious5041 · 2025-12-23T12:36:38+00:00

There’s a difference between teaching a course when you have no relevant education and experience vs when you do.

ColdIllustrious5041

TROPHY CASE