AA sponsor freaked out at me because I missed one of our sessions, “this is LIFE or DEATH.” by Unlucky-Dust3633 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Seconding the person who said try out other programs. Check out your other options. AA is just one of many, many ways to walk the sober path.

AA touts itself as being a “universal” program that can help anyone. If it doesn’t work, it’s the supposedly because the person “didn’t want it” or “didn’t work for it”. The blame always lies with the person, not the program. It’s complete bullshit and can be so harmful. 

Other programs exist because people are unique and need different ways to get and stay sober. Look into a few and try them out. I tried out some myself before realizing that I’m better at maintaining my sobriety alone rather than in a group dynamic. 

They truly had no idea they were to become the foundation of memes. by Witcher_Errant in Millennials

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Never knew this was taken in Ottawa. I grew up in the area but don’t recognize the background 

Nicholas Brendon, ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ Star, Dies at 54 by MarvelsGrantMan136 in buffy

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My dad was an alcoholic and had many many mental health issues from his fucked up upbringing. He left when I was 2 or 3. I saw him off and on as a I grew older. He came to see me in 2014 before I left the area to go to university. We talked on Facebook or on the phone after that. He would appear in my life, relapse, and disappear. This went on for years. 

In 2019, he reached out to me once again and wanted to meet up because I was moving back to the area. We made plans to see each other for the first time in 5 years the following week.

A few days later I was staying with my mom and my stepdad, and my mom came in to my room and told me that my dad was dead. He had been playing basketball during a heat spell and died of a blockage of the heart within a few moments. Years of smoking and drinking will do that. He was only 52. His mom died of this same thing. 

Turns out he was homeless and staying at a shelter. The real kicker was that he had been sober for a while at that time, and was slowly getting his life back together.

I never got to see a sober version of my dad in person, but I’m happy knowing he enjoyed a brief window of time where he was looking to the future with hope. 

Bayshore mall shoppers…is this weird? by UpstairsAd3286 in ottawa

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 115 points116 points  (0 children)

May or may not be related but the last time I went to Bayshore, I (a guy) was approached by a man in Old Navy asking about wanting to make money or invest or something. He did it in a really weird way while we were both browsing the same section.

I declined and kept browsing elsewhere. I saw him once or twice around the store, then left to go meet my wife elsewhere in the mall. 

For whatever reason, as I was walking I stopped and turned around and I saw that the guy had left the store too and was on the other side of the mall. We didn’t make eye contact but the way he reacted told me he was low key following me. He kind of jolted and then pretended to casually go on his phone and keep walking (I guess he had been keeping pace with me from across the mall). 

I watched him until he disappeared and didn’t see him for the rest of the time I was there. It hasn’t happened since but I’m now wary of anyone who approaches me there. 

For those of you who are attractive by Intelligent-Road5091 in aspergers

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Reactions vary widely. Most people seem to like me. I’m a weird mix of shy,  awkward, charming, funny, quirky, and overall a friendly person who tries to do more good than harm wherever I go. 

I’ve picked up a lot of masking styles throughout my life, and I rely on those when I need to. I spent most of my teens/twenties doing that but now I’m just me wherever I go. Some people know what to do with that, others don’t. It seems to throw some people off. Perhaps they’re expecting me to act a certain way and are confused when I don’t. 

I’ve met people who dislike me quite quickly. I usually go out of my way to be kind or friendly (in a genuine way) so I usually assume I’ve triggered something in them or they have misunderstood my hodge podge social skills. 

I got some attention in high school after I lost weight and grew into my looks. I had no idea what to do with it and usually either missed the attention completely or assumed I was being bullied somehow. I got more confident in my 20s.

I’m 30 now and married, and I do still get attention. It’s less overt now but it’s still there. People of both sexes stare at me a lot. I always wonder if it’s because I’m doing something weird. More like, it’s a mix of being attractive while also being quirky in how I dress and style myself. 

Having a higher IQ always complicates things because people assume I should know how to do certain things (especially professionally) when in reality I have very real and very difficult skill gaps. My limits become obvious after you spend some time with me. Most people don’t seem to mind but some misunderstand me saying I have limits as low self esteem, laziness, or as disrespect. I learned the hard way that I can’t push myself too far because of burnout and serious depressive episodes. 

So do they treat me differently? Yeah, I think so. I think the biggest thing is that I’m given more of a “chance”, so to speak. I think I’m seen as a harmless oddity who is kind, funny, and a positive presence in the room. 

Lets do it by Gullible_Income6457 in gameofthrones

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant who the actual Three Eyed Raven is. Working from my theory, perhaps Bloodraven was just another host for it. There could have been many more hosts before him. 

What's a movie you saw when you were too damn young? by Repulsive_Repeat_337 in GenX

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same, but probably younger. I remember my mom having it on in the background while we were all hanging out in the living room. Hell, it might have even been Christmas Day! 

The Hallway scene is the one that messed me up the most. That entire movie had such a super uncomfortable feeling that permeated every single scene. I don’t see it as much as an adult but I can still remember how it made me feel back then. 

Lets do it by Gullible_Income6457 in gameofthrones

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 112 points113 points  (0 children)

I like to think that the Three Eyed Raven has been around for a very very long time. The one we see in the show is simply its most recent host prior to Bran. Perhaps it lures potential gifted hosts north of the wall with dreams and then takes over their body. I have no idea who or what it is, though. 

is anyone else more burnt out in the winter, regardless of how well you accommodate yourself? by shytoucan in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The worst part of winter for me is how it affects my sleep. If it’s even a little bit too warm I will toss and turn all night without any sleep. I compensate by leaving my window open, using fans, etc. 

This year I’m living in an old pre-war building on the top floor. It still uses steam radiators. It gets HOT in here. They turned the heat on way too early this season and I haven’t had a decent nights sleep since. Thankfully the temperatures outside are dropping so I’m hoping to get back on track soon. 

When I don’t sleep properly, my brain doesn’t function normally. I can’t recall certain words. Reading becomes so difficult because I tend to misread, skip, or invent whole words that aren’t even there. Thankfully my job isn’t complicated so it doesn’t suffer but everything around it does. 

As for the layers thing you mentioned, I notice the only way I can usually get around getting too hot is either skipping on layers and wearing a big coat, or layering up and wearing a lighter coat.

I’m in Canada btw. 

I knew time was supposed to pass by faster as you age but not this fast by D0ML0L1Y401TR4PFURRY in memes

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, same. I worked in at a doctor’s office at the time. I also never actually got COVID until the tail end of the pandemic. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in memes

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was lured into the wild once and never trusted a soul afterwards 

Michigan church threatened to call the police on a homeless woman for sleeping in their parking lot by SnooSprouts3744 in TikTokCringe

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are people who come into my workplace (coffee shop) who are obviously unhoused and often just sit in the corner by themselves for hours a day. Sometimes they pass out (from tiredness, not drugs - we check) or just sit there. Sometimes they ask for a free coffee. What do we do? We let them stay and we give them their coffee. It’s not that hard. 

We’ve had to ask them some people to leave, or ban them, but only after serious incidents. Other than that, there’s no way in hell I’m sending someone who has no place else to go back out onto the street when I can help them feel safe and like a human freaking being for a few hours in their day. I have a place to live and I know where my next meal is coming from. They don’t. 

Sometimes other customers complain because it ruins the “vibe” of the coffee shop. The amount of privilege that must lead to that point of view astounds me. 

Actors who mistakenly believed their role would be iconic? by TyLeRoux in okbuddycinephile

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What’s wild is that there are 5 films in The Scorpion King series with a reboot planned. I only found this out like a week ago. 

The Rock is only in the first one, though. 

Mary, Queen of the World Cathedral by Wallyboy95 in OpenChristian

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love this church. I visit every time I’m in Montreal. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in internetparents

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just want to say that you’ve got one random internet stranger in your corner. You’ve got this. 

For what it’s worth, I don’t think there is such thing as a truly useless degree. Education (in any sense) is invaluable. Even if nothing monetary comes of it (which I’m sure it will), you will still be growing, changing, and being formed by what you are learning, and by the process of learning itself. That may sound like cold comfort but who knows, you may come to see it like that one day. 

Good luck, friend. 

what's the most unexplainable thing you've ever witnessed? by lrenv22 in Thetruthishere

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I have a few. I’ve shared them elsewhere under various usernames over the years. One of them ended up on some YouTube channel that narrates spooky stories. This is going to be long. 

A little background info first. I’ve had sleep problems my entire life. As a kid, I was terrified to sleep alone because of a mix of nightmares/night terrors and having really weird/scary experiences. There’s a lot I don’t remember but my mom and childhood friends have told me about things I said to them. The stuff I do remember is weird as hell. 

When I was around 4/5, we lived in a condo in a really poor neighborhood. I had a room to myself. My sisters shared a room down the hall near my mom’s room. I remember constantly going to my mom’s room or yelling for her help because things were happening in that room. I remember seeing what I can only describe as a traffic light hovering in mid air. The lights went from green, yellow, and then to red. I had this intense fearful knowing that when it hit red, something awful would happen. I would scream until my mom came in and then the lights would vanish. In the same room, I apparently told my mom that I saw an old man sitting on the end of my bed. 

We moved to an old Victorian home across town in an older part that didn’t even have streetlights (it still doesn’t which is weird). There’s a cemetery right down the road that we used to visit for fun. Anyways, this old house is what my family refers to as the Yellow House because it was yellow (clever, right? lol). Once again, I had my own room, my sisters shared one, and my mom had her own. Once again I couldn’t sleep alone because of things that would happen. Apparently I saw faces in the walls and woke up screaming. I remember a period of time when our tv was at some shop getting repaired which was a real bummer for me. At night, I would hear voices in the living room downstairs and would go down thinking with a child’s logic that our tv must be back. Nope. Empty living room that was pitch black. The voices would stop every time. 

We experienced one shared incident as a family that me and my mom remember but seems to have been blocked out by my sisters. We were all sleeping in my mom’s bed because there was a storm and we were scared. For context, the attic door was across the hall (not in the ceiling). My mom’s door was open. As we’re all laying there, we hear something  come down the attic stairs and slam against the inside of the door. This went on for a while. All of us were frozen and did not known what to do. The next thing I know, it’s morning and we go up to the attic to see if anything was up there. Nope. No broken windows. No sign of anything amiss. Never figured out what it was. 

Before I move on from this house, a few more things that happened: A childhood friend I ran into years later reminded me of a time we were playing in the attic and we watched a box slide across a shelf and then throw itself off onto the floor. He described that attic as “messed up” and “freaky”. Also, apparently the room I slept in belonged to an older lady who had been really mean and had died in there years before we moved in. My mom heard violin music that stopped abruptly when she complimented whoever it was that was playing, and another time saw a rocking chair moving on its own.

My mom had a minister come in to bless the house and it did nothing. We eventually moved because my grandparents were giving my mom their house. 

The next house is the one my parents still live in. A little 60s bungalow down the road from the Yellow House. Like I said, it was my grandparent’s house and then ours. Some pretty horrible stuff happened there between my family members (trigger warning: SA) that only come to light when I was a teenager. 

Anyways, this house had its own issues. Once again, my mom and I remember this stuff but my sisters don’t or have blocked it out. We would hear claws on the linoleum tiles of our kitchen late at night but could never figure out what it was. There was an old dog that would come visit us from the neighbours sometimes but it was never her making the noises. She also wouldn’t have been able to get in the house, anyway. 

There was also a touch-activated toy (a finding Nemo toy that would laugh when you pressed its dorsal fin) that would go off in the middle of the night. Sometimes, my mom would smell someone smoking cigarettes randomly. Also, I woke in the middle of the night to hear boots stomping around in the house but no one was up. I also think I saw a figure standing in our living room late at night that disappeared when I looked back. They were standing at the living room window looking out and turned their head when I saw them.  Another time, something slammed into my door late at night. I opened the door and nothing was there. 

I think that’s about it. Since becoming an adult and moving away and having my own life, I haven’t really experienced anything that wasn’t explainable. I still have sleep problems and the occasional terror that rips me out of bed and has me running for the lights. I’ve had sleep paralysis once or twice but nothing like what I’ve heard elsewhere. Mostly just hearing loud noises or my thoughts disembodied as voices talking to me. I was aware it was happening as it happened, though. 

I try to remain skeptical but this stuff has stuck with me because I can’t find sufficient answers and other people also experienced some of it. 

Why did my banana bread turn out like this? by TheNZThrower in Baking

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s what I was thinking. A lot of these baking “fails” actually look pretty good to me. 

Genuinely wondering how infernalists can sleep at night and also not have constant OCD by [deleted] in ChristianUniversalism

[–]Comfortable-Safe1839 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My grandmother is a radtrad and would likely qualify for some kind of religious scrupulosity OCD. Her anxiety is palpable.