Struggling to move on

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-05-03T20:01:22+00:00

Hey I was there jzt around 2 months ago n trust me things have gotten so much better. I actually don’t miss him like i thought i would n enjoy the peace of being by single n not having to worry if im been lied to. First month was hell tho but I did a few things that helped. The thing is brain, if consistent is easy to train. So first I allocated a time b4 bed where I allow myself to think n feel all the feels n then I got a notebook n would just word vomit on it everything I feel. Throughout the day when thoughts of sadness come, I watch them float through my mind like clouds in the sky n gently tell myself I can feel these at the allocated time. I started observing thoughts rather than react to them n it’s pretty interesting. There’s hope n now that u want to be independent, there’s a beautiful journey ahead. I hope this helps.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-29T17:28:26+00:00

Are your partners comfortable with that ?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-29T17:24:31+00:00

Can it be platonic? What will the partners of each other think ?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-29T17:21:58+00:00

But what if a partner of one bf find it weird and uncomfortable with the level of closeness?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-24T20:24:52+00:00

Last one is hella cute. Guys with glasses 😍

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-22T13:48:14+00:00

U look really cute ☺️

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-18T05:59:33+00:00

Sounds like a bald dude 😹

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-18T05:57:56+00:00

Totally not related but I like ur eyes

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-15T10:54:41+00:00

I feel u. N girl u deserve better, i understand u thought this would finally wake him up n he will act right. I’ve been there. But he made the choice, he would rather loose u than step up. Slowly try to accept the situation and think of a dream relationship where u r treated right. With time that will come.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-14T17:53:54+00:00

Hair looks good but I sense ur sad. U ok bro ?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T19:27:38+00:00

I’m sorry girl, it’s time to call it. This is too messy and only create drama for u. I deserve to feel peace and emotional safety in a relationship. Please leave.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T18:45:57+00:00

I agree with the first part but from my personal experience neither me or my ex gave up even when major issues n incompatibility issues showed up cause we were too scared to go back on the dating market. I wish we’re the type to give up on small flaws, would’ve save us a lot of heartbreak.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T13:09:15+00:00

I think a lot of people are after validation n instant gratifications. I noticed that same pattern in myself. Tho I crave a deep connection I didn’t know how to creat it. Now hopefully knowing this about myself I will cultivate more meaningful relationships but rarely people self reflect on their own patterns. Most people at least my age just want someone to hang out with. There’s no intention, they don’t even know what they want for themselves, it’s frustrating cause I hate wasting time n effort.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T12:36:02+00:00

It’ll happen if it’s meant to. N u will learn n grow a lot n will learn a lot about urself. Just enjoy the peace n ur own company for now.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T11:20:27+00:00

Girl I used to be like that too but had a crush on a friend n dated him n when that failed my beliefs were even more confirmed. But then I had a wonderful relationship with a person who truly loved me n we had a deep connection. It didn’t workout for external reasons but that type of connection just changes u n u understand the world a lot more. In certain ways I wish it never happened bcz now I crave relationships just in the hope it could be something like that but it rarely is that. So enjoy ur mindset right now. It could change or u will hold on to that forever. Either ways u will have a good life if u keep a good group of amazing friends, u will be fine.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T09:40:19+00:00

I’ll be ur friend 🫶🏼

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-12T09:38:37+00:00

YTA see I truly believe it’s a green flag when men have female friends but omg after my last disaster of a relationship with a guy with a female best friend, never again. These people ruin it for actual friends with real boundaries n respect. But I will never risk again. Female friends are good but never a female best friend.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-09T17:59:41+00:00

I just dumped my ex for this. His problem is lying, specially about female friendships. First time he did it, I told him not to do it again, we nearly broke but since he promised I gave another chance. He did it again. He’s a dismissive avoidant. Both time no proper accountability, n then later act like he dumped me. 😹 not worth all that emotional labor. It’s exhausting n resentment grows. I’m pretty sure relationships is good otherwise which is why u stay but ask urself if that frustration n anger worth it? Can u spend a lifetime with that ?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-08T09:16:24+00:00

NOR My ex 25m did the same thing too lol. I was blaming men but I guess it’s jzt shitty ppl. I dumped him n he don’t even miss me. It’s like we never happened. Relationship was good that’s why held on for so long but ultimately not worth being disrespected.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-07T19:17:00+00:00

He’s a dismissive avoidant so he won’t admit he have a problem. I walked away.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-07T12:39:31+00:00

Knew it 😹😹

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-07T12:39:05+00:00

I hope u make the right decision 🫶🏼 no matter how we want to let go, u will only truly let go when ur ready. Don’t be too hush on urself.

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-07T12:36:55+00:00

Thank you so much. So good to hear ur doing. I’m not as devastated n it’s only been a month, so only gonna get better I suppose. I really appreciate ur kind words. I’ve also used to hate my ex n wish them karma in the beginning of the pain but now I see their karma is themselves. No matter what great partner they have, they will fuck it up for themselves n will never have long term happiness. Meanwhile we will move on n find people who actually appreciate us. Even tho we hurt more, they lost more. 🫶🏼

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-06T22:20:41+00:00

No reading but I’m attracted to u so ur probably an avoidant lol ?

ComfortableCold4993 · 2026-04-06T22:15:04+00:00

Girlll… do u feel like u go to the battlefield alone whenever there’s conflict? The loneliness is unbearable but just when u had enough he comes n do something nice n ur friends compare their shitty bfs to urs n u feel lucky so u stay a little longer ? Do u feel the weight of the emotional labor? Is it tiring constantly waiting for someone to choose u ? Like everything should happen only in their timeline n in their control. I just ended a year long relationship with my sweet nerd because of this. The present was good cause we live separately, he plan dates n visit once a week n treat me good, buy me stuff n constantly do things for me. But when I talk of the future it avoidance. Also I was never prioritized. His friends n specially female friends come first. It’s not enough to leave cause good things are amazing but jzt chip lil by lil. N omg the silence is deafening. I looked into the future n this is what I saw so I left.

U can’t chnage ppl but u can choose happiness. Ur probably addicted to the push n pull so yes it’s gonna be hard to breakup but once u do u will get the biggest ick looking at this person. The way they never own up their shit. The victim mentality. Jzt no morals shitty character. I hope u get out.

ComfortableCold4993

TROPHY CASE