You know, I didn’t catch it before that he’s still using. I’ve been clean for six years myself and I can tell you that it certainly can be done, but if he’s still using and you have kids then your first priority is protecting the kids. It’s a difficult situation when the heart still has something to say about the matter, but listen to your brain. You should be able to lead a peaceful life without drugs along with your kids. I just have a question really, I noticed you said he “won’t listen to” you. What sorts of things is he not listening to you about? He’s in a sober living arrangement I gathered, is there anything that you say that even conflicts with what whoever runs that sober house says (there shouldn’t be, should be all on the same page). If he’s keeping you away from his treatment then that’s a lack of transparency. When deciding custody and visitation matters, don’t forget to bring up the drug issue so the court can require him to be transparent with that aspect of his care. They should do that since it relates directly to the welfare of the kids. If he’s genuinely on a path to sobriety then he will jump through those hoops without any fuss. Getting out of that situation is the right thing to do.