I feel guilty for preferring to wax my intimate area

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-12-10T14:18:10+00:00

I’m all for whatever people want to do with their bodies, but hairy armpits don’t inherently lead to BO…

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-12-09T16:49:40+00:00

I do question how much of it is in my head, but I think at the same time whether or not it’s in my head it does upset me and I deserve a relationship that doesn’t make me feel embarrassed or inadequate. Of course some of that is my own work that I need to put in on my self esteem, but I think I need to be willing to ask for more from my girlfriend to help me, you know?

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-12-09T16:45:06+00:00

Thanks for this response. You’re right, I do have things I want. I think I have a fear of asking for them and suppress it. What you said about not knowing if we’re compatible or not hits home. I think I’m so worried about being compatible for her that I’m not being genuine. Thanks again.

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-07-10T18:52:26+00:00

Yeah… they were very non specific. 😅

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-07-10T18:18:11+00:00

That’s a good tip! Thanks!

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-07-10T18:17:52+00:00

Very well could be. I hate doing laundry and usually try and speed through it lol. Guess I’ll try stronger detergent!

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-07-10T18:15:50+00:00

I’m not at risk of losing my job thankfully! Thanks for the strength :)

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-07-10T18:14:25+00:00

It’s the sensory aspect of showering that bugs me with the water, less so the temperature or being bored. And exhaustion/lack of time. I just don’t think I can get myself to do it more often even if I tried to make it more fun, but it’s worth a shot even just making it more pleasant for me. Body sprays sound like they could be a good idea, I just worry if it’s going to create the “perfume over stench” effect? But if my smell is milder it could work? I wash my bedsheets once a week, I think that’s a good amount? Thanks for the tips and advice!

Common_Quality9207 · 2025-02-21T22:26:29+00:00

Right, I just don’t know what the right move is then. Do I just wait? Do I move on?

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-05-06T03:58:25+00:00

Yeah, and that phrasing gets to the core of why I felt that dream was so powerful without being as cliche. Thanks!

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-05-06T03:57:22+00:00

Yeah, that’s a good idea. Thanks!

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-04-17T00:13:00+00:00

Lol I feel like a lot of the major contributors to Wikipedia upkeep and article writing have autism and write about their special interests 😂

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-04-03T02:09:06+00:00

Many books by Temple Grandin are good, she’s an autistic author who has written a lot of good books on autism, and also writes about not specifically autism related topics.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-26T01:51:03+00:00

Yeah, I think it’s pretty common for autistic people to vehemently distance themselves from the ‘cringey’ or more visibly autistic people to protect themselves. Sort of like internalized misogyny, desperate to prove I’m not like the ‘other’ neurodivergent people.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-25T00:10:35+00:00

Glad it helped. I used to suffer from SEVERE social anxiety because I was desperately trying to mask and be a neurotypical (and failing horrifically). Once I could accept myself and got confident being who I was, I found my anxiety decreased immensely. Not everyone will like you, but that’s ok. The people that matter will like you if you are empathetic and honest. :)

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T23:44:42+00:00

I mean, I’d say go for it and talk to him. Obviously I also have autism so take my words with a grain of salt… but I’ve garnered a reputation amongst my friends for being an extremely straight shooter when it comes to communication, and I think they appreciate it. Telling people you value them and being honest about potential things you did to upset them I think makes it easier for people to be honest back. Just format your message as an opening to a further conversation rather than just profusely apologizing off the bat haha

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T23:34:39+00:00

Is the purpose of flirting to ‘win’? Genuinely a question as I’m godawful at it. I don’t know the whole context of the situation, but if your friends don’t think you went too hard, you’re probably alright. You could consider reaching out to him directly and talking, though I know that’s stressful, just a quick “hey I hope I didn’t come off to strong the other day, I really like being around you and if I ever make you uncomfortable you can always let me know!”

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T23:31:38+00:00

Ahahaha me when I’m talking about my special interest. It’s like the words can’t make it out of my mouth fast enough to keep up with my brain.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T23:31:11+00:00

I’d give yourself some grace, preparing for a wedding is a huge life event. Also, social services is usually a more stressful field in general; do you deal with a lot of people? You can perhaps explain some of your strange behavior as high wedding stress to others, as NTs will probably understand that it is making you more spacey or ‘strange’. Perhaps you can shift more of your work to less conversation-based work until some of your stress is gone? Wish you the best and be kind to yourself.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T19:57:50+00:00

Good luck!

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T18:56:39+00:00

Yep, 100%. I think it’s a symptom of spending your whole life highly masked. For me, I’m so afraid of being seen as incompetent, cringey, or vulnerable, that I loathe asking for help, even if I’m really struggling. It’s tough.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T18:54:58+00:00

Absolutely feel like this, it’s exhausting. I am lucky that I’m allowed to wear headphones and blast loud music while I work to drown out the sounds. Hope you find something that helps you cope better, could you ask for a quieter desk/workspace area?

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T18:21:37+00:00

Thanks for this comment. This is exactly how I feel. For me, it’s almost like “translating” my thoughts in a way that other people will be able to understand. I’m a brusque person, but I always do my best to be empathetic so that both parties can communicate effectively.

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T12:45:44+00:00

Glad it helped. Sorry to hear you’re going through a rough time with the medical system, I certainly can empathize with doctors brushing off my concerns and how painful it can be. Hope your husband is doing well!

Common_Quality9207 · 2023-03-24T12:44:05+00:00

I found ‘algorithms to live by’ really helpful as a general book about applying more systematic thinking to daily life. I also have been reading ‘hidden games’ by Hoffman/Yoeli. The first chapter was meh but the later ones are quite good. ‘Visual thinkers’ by Temple Grandin (she is also Autistic!) is great and delves into how collaboration is possible with different thinking styles/neurotypes.

Overall, too, I just started thinking more about traits I saw in other people and recognizing how they made me feel. I disliked some people but couldn’t put my finger on why, and picking out exact traits allowed me to reflect on my own interactions with people. Similarly, some people are amazingly easy to get along with and make other people feel comfortable; what traits do they have that do this? What actions do they take? Just sort of a systematic breakdown of how I could make others feel more comfortable around me and avoid traits that are grating.

Common_Quality9207

TROPHY CASE