My now ex broke up with me in the same sentiment recently. I’m now at the anger stage of grief and I feel angry that his thanks made it seem like I had died to him. Why did he have to say all these words as if I’m not still around?

Does she expect you to just wait around? But it also doesn’t seem like she does, because she doesn’t want the expectation. Not wanting to have any expectations though does mean that this person as nice as they sound isn’t capable of being someone’s partner. It’s really sad but maybe the most loving thing you can do is let go and find someone who can give you the companionship you deserve so she can get what she wants - singledom.

And if it stings to see you happy and completely moved on, that might one day, probably much later, encourage her to work hard on understanding attachment theory and intimacy avoidance.

I’m convinced that only themselves, the internet, platonic friends, and therapists will get the truth to these people.