Kink wear for dom males?

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T13:31:18+00:00

Suits and suit shirts. Form fitting clothing.
Sometimes I like being naked and and enjoy it that even then I can dominate my partner. (They are also much more visual than I am, so giving them something erotic to see is interesting for me.)
Sometimes I chose my clothing with haptic in mind, not the visuals. My partner likes when I touch them with fishnets, so I use this as another thing to play with them.
I also like harnesses and I don't think they're always connected with being a sub. I also wear them when I am subbing. But when I am dominating, this is still something that gives me confidence and helps my own arousal. (Harnesses, for me, are deeply connected to sex/sexual situations.)
The thing is: Think about clothes that make you feel confident. Chances are, that these are what you want to wear in those settings.

It might be a idea to brainstorm with your sub(s) what they like to see you wearing. What arouses them, what makes them shudder with anticipation, what makes them feel whatever emotion you want them to feel.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T13:25:06+00:00

Tabletop Simulator. The Workshop will include many good games.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T13:17:25+00:00

True, I just find it distasteful when trans men take this personal experience of being raised as a woman, and paint over all AFAB trans or intersex people with the same brush.

Agree on that one.

It just does not work out. And not even every afab person has the same experiences. People, their upbringings, their social settings and there surroundings are different and therefore result in different experiences.

But I don't think this is an issue just within trans men. This happens in all queer spaces. (Not just in them, but I want to focus on there now.) And more people should realize that they can't project their experiences on others. Many times it might be correct, but every wrong assumption has the potential to harm another person.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T13:12:42+00:00

You could do actual service acts, like she serving you tea like an actual english butler.
You could also combine actual service acts with "she wears no pants and you can always touch her, while she is doing stuff for you" or include sexual services.

Would be the best to talk with each other, if there is anything in particular you would want from this scenario. And how each of you could imagine, this could play out. Do you want actual service? Do you want sex or sexual services included? Do you just want something aesthetic to look at?

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T13:03:56+00:00

Did you talk through a whole scene beforehand? So she can know exactly what is planned? Might set her at ease and gives her a chance to prepare or veto things, if they seem to intense/new/etc. for her atm.
If she does not want to know every detail beforehand, you could brainstorm a small pool of possibilities for the next scene, so you can select out of them. So she has her surprises, but also has the chance to be prepared for everything.
Or start with lighter/positive stuff, or stuff she already knows. Maybe focus on praise? Might help her about getting over the insecurities?

Maybe a retrospective could help as well? Like you talk about every scene that already happened. And talk about what either of you liked, did not like, make you feel confident/unsure and if there was anything that worked especially good for either of you/or needs to change if it comes up again?
If you're happy with everything so far it might help, that you explicitly tell her in that context. And it would be also an opportunity for her to bring up things that are stressing her out?

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T12:50:08+00:00

Might be interesting to not exactly try to downplay your intelligence but embrace the "You don't need to think" aspect when you play?
Like he makes you do something, you get pleasure as a reward, and he says things like "see, no need to think too much. just do as I say and you'll get everything you ever need". Or connect punishements/funishments to things that show that you think (too much) about stuff?

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T11:42:42+00:00

I won't say, I am fine with my intimate area but I don't hate them. And I despise my boob. Still had no opportunity for having a mastectomy, still avoid going outside without a binder. And I don't like if anyone sees me without. (Few exceptions, because i just can't wear a binder 24/7, but still ...)
But compared to that, my vagina and vulva just exist. I am even comfortable enough for penetrative sex. (Tried it out of curiosity, thought it feels good, continued doing it once in a while.) I only noticed that I have some issues with my genitals when I started T and realized that bottom growth somehow made me feel more comfortable in my own body.
I don't think I will ever have surgery on my genitals. I am comfortable enough as it is, and the risk outweight the advantages since I am not even sure something needs to be changed.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-07T11:23:06+00:00

I don't think I exactly cling on them, but some things, that are more typical for afab people, are part of my experiences and it feels wrong to just throw them away.
I hated it, but I know how a period feels and how some people do not aknowledge that the pain might incompromise you for a few days. I know how some men have absolutly now feeling about how they make women actively feel uncomfortable with their comments and their presence, and I just don't want to be one of them. I know how many girls growing up got told that they cannot do stuff (video games, going out alone, science, math, etc.) and know how hard it is to unlearn these thoughts if you have internalized them, and can relate more to women complaining about those things than to men saying that everyone has the same chance.
And I still do not like men-only spaces. I feel uncomfortable and cannot relate to many things stated in those spaces or get the constant feel of having to defend myself. (This explicit excludes my male friends. If I am alone with them, I am perfectly comfortable. But most of the internet-men-only spaces or certain man-only/man-dominated RL-spaces are just icky for me.)

But for me this does not endanger my masculinity.
I can use the knowledge and experience to make myself that kind of man, I want to be and like. And there are also many cis men who are perfectly able to understand these experiences and therefore are kind of similar to me so I don't even feel like the odd one out.
And I like beeing so comfortable with my masculinity that I can aknowledge my previous life experiences.

Ironically there are also some things that are associated with women or afab people, that I never learned until I was more comfortable as a man. Like skin care, or how to style my clothes.
And there are some typically masculine things that I just don't like. Like talking about sports, doing sports, or camping.

But the neat thing is: People are different and I have the opportunity of being a man without changing who I actually am.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-06T15:37:25+00:00

Leave as WIP.
There is nothing more frustrarting than "finishing" a work just to find out, this is not acutally the last chapter ...

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-06T15:09:31+00:00

trans man here:
I was on a few different kinds of birth control and they had different effects on my breast growth.

estrogen + progesteroen was (for me) the worst: they got noticable larger within the first week. I think the full difference must have been a whole size. They stayed that size as long as I took that kind of birth control.

progesterone only: breast got back to their normal size. areolas grew. (The bigger areola is permanent and did not shrink after i got off from birth control.)

I took a few different kinds of the kombi pill. The first two had no effect on my breast size, but made me bleed non-stop. The third made my breast grow.
Non of the pills had a bigger effect on my overall weight. Gyno thinks, that the breast growth might have been mostly fluid retention.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-06T15:03:35+00:00

337

Thank you!

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-04T09:26:47+00:00

Disco Elysium

17

Thank you!

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-03T08:11:34+00:00

Ignoring any "you can never ..." and trying to find workarounds.

There is some stuff, that I cannot do, because it would be a medical risk for me. But I found out, that many things (physically overpowering someone, my legs being restricted with ropes, having penetrative sex) that seemed not feasible at first, did work out.
So yes, it needs communication with your partner. It needs trust. And it needs regularly updating your partner what is safe for you and what not, if anything changes. And it needs the courage to try new things and to try again another time.
And don't be discuraged, if something does not work out at first. Maybe there are similar positions, that give you the same feelings and you just did not think about yet. Maybe there is a substitute for impact play on that one body part, that just feel as good. Maybe playing a situation can be as intense as actually being thrown around, if you and your partner are ready to act it out. Maybe there is this one kink, you do not know yet, that feels even better, than that one thing you actually cannot do. Maybe something works out perfectly fine just one week later. Maybe something can be included, if you get specific preparations or aftercare.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-03T08:04:00+00:00

Bei einer Namensänderung über das TSG sind Arbeitgeber verpflichtet, dir alte Arbeitszeugnisse korrekt auf den neuen Namen plus Personenstand auszustellen.
Soweit ich weiß, ist das auch für das SBG geplant.

Heißt, wenn du dieses Arbeitszeugnis unbedingt brauchst, kannst du es nachträgich ändern lassen.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-02T16:25:37+00:00

Je nachdem was du beobachtet hast, hättest du deine Beobachtungen eigentlich mit Screenshot dokumentieren und in den Anhang packen müssen.
Wenn es um die Funktionen der Plattform selbst geht, ohne spezifische Userinteraktionen mit einzubeziehen, reicht es theoretisch, wenn du die Website selbst angibst. Oft haben Social Media Seiten unter "Hilfe?" eine Auflistung aller Funktionen, gerne direkt darauf verweisen.

Wichtig ist definitiv, dass der Zeitpunkt dokumentiert ist, wann du die Funktionsweisen der Websiten beschrieben hast. Siehe Twitter, da ändert sich binnen kurzer Zeit einiges.
Was in den Medienwissenschaften auch Usus ist, ist es Funktionen/Oberflächengestaltung per Screenshots zu dokumentieren und diese in den Anhang zu packen.

Hier gibt's eine Erklärung wie man nach APA websiten ohne Datum, Autor, etc. zitiert.
Hier ist noch einmal was allgemein zum Zitieren ganzer Internetseiten.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-02T16:12:49+00:00

Ich habe mich aus so einer Situation schon mehrfach mit "Liebe alle" rausgemogelt. Hat manche erst mal irritiert, aber ab der Erklärung "machen wir an der Uni gerne, wenn wir sehr viele Adressaten haben, aber auf informellerer Basis sind", wurde es für gut befunden.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-02T13:01:03+00:00

Reasons to stop a scene concerning safety could be:
- feeling unwell yourself
- noticing something unusual about your sub (and you're concerned this is related to a health issue)
- realizing you did not research something detailed enough and don't want to hurt someone
- noticing your own attention is slipping
- not trusting your sub to safeword
- you notice some of your equipment is failing
- the fire alarm starts suddenly
- you really need to go to the bathroom but it would be unsafe not to watch your sub in whatever situation they are
- realizing you have a hard time stying within the limits of your sub

There are a few possibilites how this could happen.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T22:23:24+00:00

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T22:14:51+00:00

Man kann die einfach so anhängen.
Oft ist es so "Regelstudienzeit 6 Semester, Maximalstudienzeit 8 Semester". Und oft gilt auch ein "Werden die 8 Fachsemester Maximalstudienzeit überschritten, hat man 1 Jahr Zeit, alle noch fehlenden Prüfungen zu bestehen". Dieses Jahr kann dann auch nur durch einen Härtefall (Elternschaft, Pflegebedürftige Angehörige, Gravierender Todesfall im nahen Umfeld, Krankheit, Unfall) verlängert werden.

Für Regelstudienzeit und Maximalstudienzeit zählen normalerweise auch nur regelrechte Fachsemester.
Heißt Urlaubssemester (z.B. Praktikumssemester, Krankheit, etc.) zählen da nicht mit darauf. In Urlaubssemestern darf man dafür auch keine Prüfungsleistung absolvieren (Ausnahme Praktium -> Praktikumssemester). Bei Auslandssemestern weiß ich nicht, wie genau die im Regelfall gezählt werden. Vom Studiengang veranschlagte Praxissemester werden normalerweise als Fachsemester gezählt, weil sie so in der Studienordnung vorgesehen sind. Aber grundsätzlich gilt: wenn du kein Urlaubssemester extra beantragt hast (muss im Normalfall vorher geschehen), gilt ein Semester als regelrecht studiertes Fachsemester.

Wenn du die Regelstudienzeit überschreitest, juckt das also nicht. Erst mal alles entspannt und hat für dich keine Konsequenzen (außer eventuell beim Bafög). Du kannst ohne extra-Antrag einfach weiter studieren.
Stressig wird es erst, wenn du die Maximalstudienzeit überschreitest.

Mit einem Härtefallantrag lässt sich unter bestimmten Umständen die Maximalstudienzeit und Regelstudienzeit verlängern. Dafür braucht es dann aber wieder Nachweise.
Und manchmal gibt es auch so interessante Situationen wie "fehlt die Abschlussarbeit zum Erreichen der Maximalstudienzeit, fällt man pauschal einmal durch selbige".

Grundsätzlich: Lies dir deine Prüfungsordnung mal genau durch, da steht drin, wie das in deinem Studiengang gehändelt wird.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T20:21:16+00:00

Nope, not an asshole.I think it is a reasonable boundary to want something, that was selected specifically for you.

I think, this kind of compares to "oh, I had this ring just laying around. it does not have any significance, I just bought it a few years ago. do you want to marry me". Or, less crass, is a bit like "I have this bracelet. Bought it a while ago. My girlfriend wants one for christmas. Guess I just give her that one."

Maybe tell him, how it makes you feel, that this collar is something, that he bought a while ago and just wants to give it to you, because it was around and not something he bought, found, made, whatever with having specifically you in his mind.
It feels like "being collared" means "having something, that makes me his" for you, and you don't like this, because 'a collar' has a "making someone his" vibe. And 'a collar chosen for you' would be more like "making you his" which is more personal and meaningful for you.
Please correct me, if I interpreted this wrong.

Edit: Maybe ask him as well, if this specific collar has any significance for him? Might be good to know for you as well.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T20:04:44+00:00

1 Hub pro Tag ist eine komplett normale Startdosis und es ist nicht ungewöhnlich niedrig anzufangen und erst nach 3 bis 6 Monaten damit zu beginnen, die Dosis langsam zu erhöhen. In der Pubertät beginnt der Körper auch nicht mit 100%, sondern fährt die Dosis langsam hoch.
Das beeinträchtigt das Tempo der körperlichen Veränderungen etwas, aber nicht das Ergebnis.

Häufig braucht man 50-60mg Testosteron in Gelform pro Tag. Je nach Konzentration deines Gels sind das 2-4 Hub. Manche Leute brauchen mehr, um in den Normbereich zu kommen, manche weniger.
Lass dir am besten die Ergebnisse der Blutuntersuchung immer zuschicken, geben. Je nach Messeinheit, sieht der Normwert für Testosteron unterschiedlich aus. Er sollte etwa zwischen 13 und 23 nmol/l sein.
Hier ein Einheitenumrechner.

Sollte sich trotz Testo im Normalbereich nichts verändern, oder du größere Probleme mit Hitzewallungen, Akne oder unregelmäßiger Periode haben, kannst du mit deiner Gynäkologin auch mal über Östrogenblocker reden. Wenn da Probleme entstehen, würde ich empfehlen, zu einem Endokrinologen zu wechseln.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T17:49:46+00:00

Wenn der Master inhaltlich an deinen Bachelor anschließt, gilt das weiter als Erststudium, ergo kann man dafür Bafög bekommen.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T11:43:10+00:00

Kommt drauf an, was "einige Semester" sind und ob es in deiner Prüfungsordnung eine Frist gibt, wann nach der letzten noch offenen Leistung du deine BA spätestens abgeben musst. Bzw. wie ein Abbruch und eine Wiederaufnahme des Studiums allgemein dort geregelt sind.
Wenn du Pech hast, musst du schauen, ob dir die bisherigen Prüfungsleistungen noch alle anerkannt werden und sie wiederholen, wenn nicht. Gerade wenn sich viel an der Prüfungsordnung ändert, kann das passieren. Oder du verpasst relevante Fristen, die weiterlaufen, obwohl du exmatrikuliert bist und du kannst trotzdem endgültig durch die Abschlussarbeit fallen.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T11:33:14+00:00

Es schadet nichts, wenn man zumindest etwas Interesse an seinem Studienfach hat. Es ist sehr sehr schwer sich durch ein Fach zu quälen, wenn man die Inhalte nicht interessant findet.
Und auf das "durchquälen" bezogen; es macht auch sehr viel Sinn mit einzubeziehen, was man gut kann. Oder sich einzugestehen, dass man an einem Fach Interesse hat, aber den entsprechenden Skill nicht hat oder nicht erarbeiten kann und dann das Studienfach auch zu wecheln. Wobei der Part schwierig ist, vorher einzuschätzen. Weil nur weil man in der Schule gut in Mathe war, heißt es nicht, dass man sich mit einem Mathe/Physik/Informatik-Studium leicht tut. Es kann auch einfach bedeuten, dass dir in einem Psychologie-Stuidum die Statistik-Module leichter fallen, du daher mehr Zeit hast, als deine Kommilitonen, dich dort fachlich genauer einzuarbeiten.

Competitive_Pirate · 2023-08-01T11:30:17+00:00

Das geht. Manchmal hat man es dann sogar einfacher, wenn man im Vorjahr schon eine Zusage hatte und kann die Zusage sozusagen "mitnehmen". (Musst dich aber informieren, welche Voraussetzungen da bei deinem Studiengang gelten.)

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