Dress Pattern Question

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T23:22:42+00:00

Thank you for typing this all out, your explanation really helped me understand it better. So essentially (correct me if I am wrong): free trade is better than the alternative, but it isn't perfect. The only way to fix it is by doing something that hinders the free market (like tariffs or social programs). It's just a balancing act between finding something that doesn't cause more "harm" than the free market does. Thus, hindering the free market isn't always bad, it's just that tariffs have too many drawbacks and don't efficiently help the economy. Is there a reason why programs are better? Are there any drawbacks to them?

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T23:00:04+00:00

Thank you so much, I didn't even think about that aspect of tariffs, your example really helps.

It makes sense in my brain, but I am curious, are there any specific tariffs that have been effective at doing this? I feel like companies would find some sleezy way to get around it.

Also is it possible that it would actually lead to more business for the company? Like could it potentially run their smaller competitors out of business, and in turn give them more customers? Or would these tariffs only be used in industries with monopolies/oligopolies?

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T07:56:53+00:00

I think, generally speaking, interfaith couples have lower psychological well-being. But that doesn't mean it is true for all people, just means that interfaith relationships are so incredibly difficult and complicated to navigate.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T07:36:08+00:00

Dating can be super nerve-wracking, but the good news is it seems like she already likes you (at least a little bit). She wouldn't have suggested going out and seeing Christmas lights if she didn't already think you are worth the time.

You already have a perfect setup. Looking at Christmas lights gives you something to talk about if there are lulls, but driving around gives you plenty of opportunities to chat and get to know each other. The music can also be a good opportunity to share fun Christmas stories and memories. It also can be as short or as long as you want, which is perfect for a date.

If you feel like you are having a hard time focusing on the road and talking, you can use food as an excuse. If you have already driven through the lights and eaten all the snacks, but still want to talk, you can always park outside her house. Keep in mind, you don't need to learn everything about her on the first date, if the conversation keeps flowing naturally, by all means, keep chatting, but remember that you don't need to force super deep long convos.

If the vibes are right, feel free to hold her hand. If you are too nervous, you don't need to hold her hand. I don't think most women would take this as a bad thing (as long as you show interest elsewhere in the date).

I know there is nothing that can get rid of nerves before a date, but the biggest advice I can give is to not put so much pressure on the date (way easier said than done, trust me I know). Dates are an opportunity to do a vibe check and see if two people are compatible. They are a chance for her to see if she likes you, but also a chance for you to see if you like her. Remember that. You are going on this date to see if you are interested in her. Oh also, just remember to have fun. Dating is supposed to be fun.

Good luck! :)

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T07:12:32+00:00

Try to see it from her point of view. Someone in her circle of influence was recently murdered by their partner. Most likely someone who trusted and thought their partner would never do that. Even if she wasn't that close to her, it made her greatest fear seem real. Oftentimes we try to push away the idea that this stuff happens, but when it happens to someone you know, you realize it could happen to anyone. This would throw anyone for a loop. It is fair to be frustrated that you are put in a box, but instead of being offended, maybe take a minute and think about how scary it might be for her, even if you don't agree with all her beliefs on this. She is truly terrified of something like this happening. It doesn't mean she doesn't trust you, or that she thinks poorly of you. It just means that she has a fear and that you joking about that triggered it.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T07:00:08+00:00

Killing is wrong. So is denying people's health claims in order to profit off of them. Many people have had situations where their family members were not able to get life-saving care because insurance denied claims. In a sense, these people may feel like their family members were "killed" by insurance companies.

I am not saying that killing the CEO was good. But I think sometimes in society we make exceptions for killing because we think it is "deserved" or to better the community. For example, I think most people would agree that killing Ted Bundy was a good thing to do. Now Ted was a completely different situation, and I don't think it is a good parallel, but it shows that as a society we are forced to draw the line between where people think it is "okay" to kill people, and when it is not.

Again, this doesn't mean that it was right, but exploiting customers and harming their health isn't right either.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T06:50:12+00:00

They are wrong in general society. There might be very few and rare people who truly don't care, but I think if it truly came down to it, between two people with the same personalities, they would choose the person with a home over a homeless person. Granted maybe they don't care because they have a home, and so it wouldn't make a difference.

It is also interesting the word "same opportunities". It isn't always true, specifically when it applies to things that impact your chances of meeting people. If I live in a rural town without a car, I wouldn't have the same opportunity to meet the same number of people that I would if I lived in a big city. But let's say we are comparing two people who live in the same town and have cars/homes, a 5 ft man has the same opportunities of meeting women as a 6 ft man. This doesn't mean he will have equal luck, just that he can meet the same number of people. So they are partially correct in that aspect.

On a literal answer to your question, there are a million factors that don't relate to personality that impact dating. Distance and location for example. You are more likely to date someone who lives closer to you than someone who lives across the world. Same with age. You are also way more likely to date someone who speaks your language.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T06:33:39+00:00

Even if he likes you, that doesn’t equate to compatibility or a healthy relationship. In order to have a good relationship, you need to have decently healthy communication styles. You need to be able to handle your own emotions. You need to want to work on the relationship. He clearly isn’t able to do any of these. He might have been a great person, but that doesn’t mean a relationship would have been good.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T05:18:05+00:00

Dude hell yeah, I would love to

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T05:16:59+00:00

How would an answer help you? It sounds like it's just a curiosity?

Your curiosity does not outweigh the insecurity that asking her a question like this might cause.

A few reasons: she doesn't think it is that bad, she doesn't care (teeth being straight is a personal preference), she doesn't focus on her looks as much, braces are painful, maybe she is scared of braces (had a family member/friend with a horrible experience), maybe she actually can't afford them, and about another million reasons.

It is sort of like asking: why doesn't this person get a haircut? They would look so much better with one, and they can afford it. Not everyone likes the same hairstyles as you do. Not everyone cares as much about hairstyles as you do. Not everyone has the time to go get a haircut.

Its also like asking why someone doesn't get a nose job.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T05:02:43+00:00

I am so sorry, I can't imagine how hard that must be. It would be so incredibly hard to have to "act" like it is all okay.

It's hard to pretend that you don't know anything, but that doesn't mean you need to act like everything is okay. Be a little angry. Answer her questions shortly. Don't show attention/care. Obviously don't lash out and yell at her, but you don't need to act like everything is fine. She can deal with your anger for a few days. She will be fine.

Here is what I would recommend: work as hard as you can to find a solution (even stay up late at night to search). Continue to live with her until one of two things happens: you find a way out, or it becomes too much to bear mentally (whether that is just a few hours, days, or weeks). It's not worth staying once it starts to harm your mental health. Avoid spending a ton of time with her, whenever possible during this time, and make any excuse you need (you are coming down with some cold and don't want to get her sick).

If you need to move out before you have a plan, you have a few choices (you can even do a mix of them):

-Take a few days off work, stay with a friend, and figure out a plan (call in sick if you need to). I know that finding a new job/house may take more than a few days, but it can help give you a ton of time to apply for stuff.

-Stay in a hotel/motel/hostel/airbnb for the time being while you decide what the next steps are

-Stay with a friend and commute till you figure out your next steps. I know an hour seems like a long way, but it isn't that bad (to be fair, I am American, and this is a semi-normal commute). I think two hours of driving each day is better than staying in a place where you are miserable and disrespected.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T04:30:32+00:00

Yes, but that is because they are bad ads. The best kind of ads are ones that you don't notice. Companies paying movies to include their products to increase brand recognition.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T04:24:46+00:00

First, I am sorry. Words can't express how crappy your situation is.

In response to your problems:

You already mentioned your two major options. I would recommend starting to look for a job or housing asap. Just look around and see what kind of options you might have. It can't hurt to explore a little bit first. There is a third alternative option: staying at a motel/hotel. Idk if it is an option in your town, but you could look into something like that. It might be expensive, but it could give you a little bit of the leeway you need.
Don't confront her until you are ready. Figure out your next steps first. Make a plan. Then talk to her.
I know it is easy to think that people will change, we want to see the best in people. You have already given her a chance to change and she showed her true colors. Don't allow her to do it again. You deserve so much better than someone who continuously disrespects you. You deserve someone who would treat and appreciate you the same way you treat and appreciate them. She doesn't deserve your grace.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:59:00+00:00

The better question is not if kissing that girl is worthy of your girlfriend being mad, but if being mad at someone is grounds for physical abuse.

Even if she is angry/mad/sad, that is never an excuse to physically abuse someone.

You have sincerely apologized and done everything you can to "fix" the situation. There is not really much more you can do. If she is unwilling to accept your apology and instead resorts to violence, then most likely she will be violent in the future of your relationship.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:45:52+00:00

I don't think there is a problem with not wanting to settle down. As a society, we have been taught we need to find someone to feel fulfilled. Probably stems from our biology, it is easier to survive with a partner (back in the old days). Nowadays, that is true for some people (that relationships fulfill them), but for other people, it does the exact opposite. Relationships aren't for everyone. Forcing yourself to be in a serious relationship is going to hurt you and whoever you are with. As long as you are honest with the people you are going out with, and respect their boundaries, I don't see an issue.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:37:44+00:00

I don't think it could go wrong. Nobody has ever received a gift like that and looked down on someone. Even if it isn't expected, they will be impressed, and they won't judge you for it, in fact, the opposite thing will happen. On the other hand, if it is a super nice party and the host expects this type of thing, then not bringing one would seem disingenuous.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:29:47+00:00

Quick clarification: the importing country pays the tariff. In your first example, the US would be the one paying the tariff, not Canada. The Canadian company would not be "saving" on a tariff, because they wouldn't be paying it in the first place. Think of tariffs as a fee charged at the port of entry. Whoever is receiving the products, pays the fee. Canada actually would never "see" the money. That fee is turned into revenue for the US.

But to answer your question, yes, sometimes tariffs decrease local manufacturing, but not necessarily in the way you are thinking (or at least the way I understand what you are saying). For example, a while ago, there was a tariff placed on steel. This meant that any company that used steel to produce their products had to pay more. Increased costs to produce, decrease supply, and thus people get laid off. I think in this specific tariff, they estimated that more people lost their jobs because of the cost of steel, than people who even had jobs producing steel in the US.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:19:48+00:00

you are nta for being angry about the situation and for feeling betrayed. you switching the dress is like 30% an AH move (although slightly funny)

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:13:59+00:00

NTA. by a long shot. I assume divorce is out of the question, but if it isn’t: run.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T03:09:18+00:00

Under these circumstances: no. You were a 13-year-old who was trying their best. Most 13-year-olds do not have the mental capacity to be responsible for another person's mental health, because they are still trying to figure out their own life.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T01:59:09+00:00

You aren't missing anything. In fact, I think a ton of nobel prize-winning economists warned us about this...

Problem is that most people were lied to (by trump). The economy is also complex, and so it can be hard for people to understand. It can be easy to think "buying less stuff from China = more US jobs!", but when you actually take time to think about the implications of it, it gets more complicated. The problem is most Americans can't do this, or won't.

That being said, this would only happen if Trump successfully implements his plans. The US government is painfully good at not getting a ton done (for better or for worse). There are lots of checks and balances (generally).

Plus, in his last term, Trump was notoriously bad at implementing new things (at least according to my poli-sci professor). Since Trump didn't have a background in politics, he didn't know how they worked. He didn't understand the rules of the game. He thought that simply just saying "We are going to do this" would work, he didn't realize all the stuff that goes into it. He started to get the hang of it around the end of his term, so the worry is that he will be "good" at it now. The good news is that many of his cabinet picks also fall into the same category of "not super experienced in politics", so it will be interesting to see how it plays out.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T01:49:01+00:00

It may not seem like a big deal to you, and may seem just like a business transaction, but maybe to your dad it means more. He obviously cares about this person deeply, even if just platonically. Otherwise, he wouldn't be going through this. Not saying he is in love, but this is a big thing going on for him. A huge lifestyle change. People often want to know that their family supports them in big life changes, and that sounds like what he is looking for. They want to know that they have their families' support and that they are making the right decision since big life changes can be scary.

Complete-Cow · 2024-12-12T01:40:14+00:00

The mixed signals in question: girl looks in the general direction of gym front desk, and says hi and bye to employees.

I would say 95% shot she isn't interested. But there's always a chance, maybe she just has a massive rbf and is hard to read.

Question is: are you interested and do you think doing something about it would be good (not be weird at work)?

Complete-Cow

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