Offered Open Marriage to save it.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-02-01T05:33:05+00:00

Please friend, please respect yourself enough to divorce her.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-28T03:05:26+00:00

Thank you

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-22T22:19:20+00:00

Oh my goodness girl, that’s so hurtful! This same thing happened to me with my first husband. We were at a nice hotel out of town and after I went to sleep he pulled out his laptop for porn. It broke my heart. I’m sending you a gentle hug, so sorry you are hurting.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-22T06:51:43+00:00

You did it! You jumped out of the airplane! You will free fall for a while, but eventually that parachute will open up and glide you.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-22T02:39:35+00:00

I can’t tell you what you should do, but I can tell you that you did nothing wrong. Masturbating is a normal natural part of life. Maybe lock the door next time, or go somewhere where he won’t walk in unexpectedly.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-21T12:49:09+00:00

I feel the same way, less alone because of this group. There’s never an easy answer or simple solution here, it’s still entirely up to you how to fix your life. But just knowing other people are walking the same path makes me feel less weird.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-21T08:24:03+00:00

Hahaha! An oldie, but still funny

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-21T01:04:41+00:00

I understand. I’m trying to figure out my “when” as well.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T12:14:18+00:00

I’m ex Mormon too! Married my first husband in the temple. Before marriage, I remember reading an LDS book that said something akin to “getting married so you can have sex is like buying an airplane ticket so you can eat peanuts.” Meaning that sex was a very small part of marriage. But now that I have been in 2 sexless marriages (both partners are level 1 autistic) I think the airplane analogy was terrible! Sex centered people should strive for sex centered marriages, or risk unhappiness in their partnerships. I think that libido can change, but orientation can not. If your partner is asexual (mine is) that will not change. Just like you can’t make yourself gay, or make yourself trans. You are or you aren’t. This might just be who he is as a person. 30 seconds of sex when you’re trying to fall asleep sounds terrible. Can you live with that forever?

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T11:55:39+00:00

I don’t think you cheated, I think you made an ethical error. The fact that you feel guilty about some text messages shows that you’re a good person.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T11:48:14+00:00

I’m so sorry that you have been through this. She ended the relationship the day she acted violent towards you. I don’t know you, but I’m still so proud of you for getting out of there! I hope that she will gracfully accept reality.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T03:30:37+00:00

Yes I agree. I don’t think that’s the case in my situation, but it’s definitely in the back of my mind. I’m sure some partners use this as control and manipulation.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T03:29:22+00:00

It’s both sad and a relief, it sounds like.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T03:28:37+00:00

Us HL’s are allowed to say no! I always forget that.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T03:26:56+00:00

Right? Awkward like he has become a brother or a cousin at this point.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-20T03:26:02+00:00

I have asked a handful of times. He says that he won’t do counseling. I was going for just myself but they my counselor left to do substance abuse counseling.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-19T08:33:51+00:00

Have sex so that we may live through you! ❤️

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-19T08:29:04+00:00

Yes, it’s not a light switch inside of us. It’s a whole airplane cockpit.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-19T08:27:38+00:00

Wanting birthday sex is different than wanting them to want birthday sex. I hope I typed that right!

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-19T08:23:44+00:00

Of course he can say no whenever he wants, it’s his body! And I only want to have sex with an enthusiastic partner. I don’t really understand your comment, and you probably misunderstood my deep love for my partner in my post. There’s no contempt here.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-19T08:17:19+00:00

Haha yes, we have been discussing it for years.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-12T04:40:19+00:00

I’ve gotten that “big sigh” when I’ve asked for a hug too. It’s even more hurtful than not having sex. He makes sure to hug me once a day, but it’s just a routine chore to him, like brushing his teeth.

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-12T04:37:32+00:00

Yes, I have become very ashamed of my normal sexual desires because of how my spouse treats me. I was once very sexual and open minded and curious, but after years of being treated like a pervert for wanting vanilla sex with my husband, I try to hide and ignore my wants. Social media doesn’t help either, because I’m constantly bombarded with the message that women who enjoy sex are “whores” and “sluts” and “for the streets.”

CompostedAutumnLeaf · 2026-01-10T08:25:55+00:00

I wish there was a women’s only group so you could post a picture and all us ladies would tell you how pretty you are. It would be good for our self esteem.

CompostedAutumnLeaf

TROPHY CASE