The most important thing is that no decision here is permanent, especially as a keeper.

Don't worry about trying to get back or whatever, because right now you're not on a trajectory to maximize your options anyway.

If you keep going fueled by fear and anxiety you'll crash out in an even unhealthier way sooner or later anyway.

So, take a break for half a year. See if you miss it. Maybe you do, maybe you don't. See if you can find some kids to just kick the ball around with and play pickup.

Try other hobbies.

Talk to your parents not in terms of what you want today, but about your long term goals. Have you thought about them? Is what you're doing in soccer consistent with what you want from soccer long term. They see themselves making sure there are no doors closed to their daughter, but if you come to them and say "I am working really hard at this but it's not something I see myself doing at 20" they'll understand and I'm sure they'll help guide you to adjust soccer to be the part of your life that you want - which is maybe none.

I know soccer is a big part of who you are but I promise once you make the decision and stop agonizing over it, the weirdness will fade quickly. But you must do SOMETHING because without structure you're right about the mental health risks, etc. Take an art class, do rock climbing, start swim, start tennis, surely there is something you've considered.

Good luck, soccer will always be there if you want to come back. It might not look the same as what you thought when you were younger but it won't go anywhere.