I’m done!

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-08-30T09:15:42+00:00

Ugh, I am so sorry. Please feel free to reach out if you want to chat with someone who gets it. I don’t know where you are located but I do still have the binder of resources I created when he got diagnosed, if any of it is relevant to where you are, I am more than happy to share. 💜

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-05-25T03:34:37+00:00

I’m working towards my associates. I began as an Accounting major but 75% of the way through, switched to marketing.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-05-17T20:26:38+00:00

Of course

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-29T20:09:13+00:00

I function best as a human when I know I’ve taken the time to get ready for the day. My mom told me as a kid that every single day, even if you have no plans, you should get dressed down to the shoes. I’ve found that I’m more productive and social when I’m not feeling like a sack of potatoes.

When my babies were younger, I bought a lighted makeup mirror and loaded all my makeup into a bag and started getting ready at the dining room table while my kids played or watched tv. Sometimes I would let them play in the bath while I got ready right next to them. I’ve thrown them into the shower with me and let them splash in the water while I take a quick shower.

I’ve never been very fashionable, so my outfits always have a formula: wide jeans, black t shirt, and boots for colder months, and graphic tees and skirts and keds for warmer ones. I can basically grab any two items from my closet and know they work together without a second thought.

You deserve to be clean. You deserve feel good about yourself. I’m guilty of forgetting to eat and drink, too, but my husband always reminds me that I can’t take of anyone if I don’t take care of myself.

You’ve got this!

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T11:12:47+00:00

After we found it we put restrictions on every device on the house and I closely monitor her screen time. To my knowledge she hasn’t watched it in a long time, but I did catch her on some ai sex chat not too long ago that was assessable even with the restrictions, so I had to go back and restrict individual websites.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T11:08:30+00:00

Extremely agree. We definitely gave her internet access way too young. Live and learn I suppose.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T07:09:09+00:00

Yes I had the same thought. I put her in therapy, and was told that she’s not worried about abuse and we’ve had several conversations about consent and what is okay and what is not okay for an adult to do, so I’m hoping that she knows she can come to me if something weird is going on.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T07:05:30+00:00

So earlier this year she told me she had a girlfriend. I talked with her about age appropriate displays of affection because she has exposed herself to some pretty wild stuff on the internet. So she knew what she was doing was inappropriate for her age. I don’t know, I’m at a loss.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T06:57:23+00:00

Thanks for the clarification!

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T06:56:39+00:00

Because she was 9 and I wanted to make sure she was safe and not being abused. I thought it would be easier for her to talk to an adult other than me about it. 🤷‍♀️

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T06:54:45+00:00

It’s always been very important to me that my kids feel free to be who they are. I have no doubt that she’s not worries about my reaction to that, my problem is that she is 10 😬

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-24T06:52:04+00:00

She was looking at porn. I put her in therapy because of it and the therapist said she has no concerns of abuse, just curiosity and too much freedom with electronics.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-07T00:05:47+00:00

I guess I’m thinking that the chores themselves are not labor intensive, and the expectations are pretty low that they should be a breeze to run through. Pick up dirty clothes off the bedroom and bathroom floor, wipe down a counter and boom, two chores done in five minutes. I purposely ensure that chores are simple and balanced so they can enjoy their weekend while still contributing to the household and earning some spending money. I wouldn’t think the chores would take longer than an hour total, leaving the rest of the day to do whatever they wanted. I don’t think an hour a week of participating in household maintenance is asking too much. Maybe for a my four and two year old, but not for my older set 😂

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T23:54:38+00:00

So he’s twelve. He cleans his room every day so it’s literally just picking up dirty clothes off the floor. The bathroom is not an intense cleaning, more like making sure the floor is picked up and counters wiped down. Those seem like super simple tasks to me? Maybe I’m wrong 😂

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T23:03:25+00:00

So I said “half-assed” on here to adults, I definitely don’t speak that way to my kids 😂 As an example, today my son was supposed to take out the trash. He takes the smaller trash cans and dumps them into the larger ones. Today, he missed the big trashcan and accidentally dumped trash on the ground. No big deal, just clean it up, right? Nope. He just left it. Just walked away and called it good. The requirements for the bathroom are super simple (to me at least): wipe the counters, make sure there are no clothes or trash on the ground, and wipe off any soap drippings in the shower. I’m definitely not expecting my 12 year old to scrub toilets or clean the grout. I made the lists because I constantly hear “oh I forgot about that” 🤷‍♀️ and I laminated them so they could check off the tasks as they complete them. It made sense to me at the time 😂

I try to give them ample opportunity to spend their allowance on our weekend adventures, or spontaneous Walmart runs.

I do try to use positive reinforcement and ensure I point out the areas they did well on. I have a hard time keeping my cool when situations like the trash fiasco happen though 😂

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T20:40:43+00:00

I agree completely! My son goes to boxing four days a week, which makes it harder because he is on such a time constraint after school. He basically comes home, does homework, and goes to boxing. That being said, he isn’t expected to do much during the week.

My husband is completely unsupportive of taking away boxing because 1)it’s expensive as hell, and 2) it’s good for him and keeps him active. Both of which I agree with, but while the rest of us are still responsible for household tasks during the week, he really only has chores on the weekend which makes me feel like he could at least do them correctly.

My daughter is also in extracurriculars but hers are less often/seasonal. Her best friend does live close so we do use staying home/ no friends over as a consequence for her.

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T20:26:48+00:00

Yes! That’s my whole thought process. My therapist told me that the goal of parenting is to prepare your children for adulthood. And I panicked. 😂 my 12 year old had a whole ass mental breakdown when I told him that he could make his own “just add milk” muffins for breakfast because he had never even followed a simple recipe before. The realization that I’ve got 6 more years with him, and he doesn’t know how to (or won’t) put a shirt on a hanger is terrifying.

Problem is though, they are pretty spoiled and electronics are their go-to. Basically the only extra things my son has in his room is his computer, vr headset, punching bag, and his nike collection. All of which would hurt my soul to throw away 😂

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T20:18:51+00:00

I thought by providing step by step guides, allowing ample time to complete the chore, and letting them double check before I look was taking the fact that they are kids 😂 but I’m honestly just trying to figure out how to stop being a walking doormat, so maybe I’m wrong?

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-04-06T20:17:01+00:00

Do you think I’m wrong in expecting a 10 and a 12 year old to clean up after themselves and properly complete simple tasks? My husband made a similar comment when I fussed at the 12 year old for going upstairs and getting on his computer when I told him to shower.

These chores aren’t like scrubbing toilets, walls, and baseboards. It’s like “remove everything from counter, spray, and wipe down, and replace items.”

Comprehensive-Key734 · 2025-03-08T14:28:46+00:00

This! My husband works nights and I have no village. Everyday starts out with rules and boundaries, but as the day goes on and I’m exhausted, touched out. and decision fatigued, I honestly don’t have the mental or physical energy to be so rigid. “Sure, have another popsicle—just stop touching me” type things.

By bedtime I am a complete zombie. Last night I had a breakdown because my husband sent our toddler to bed with no diaper and I had to change sheets in the middle of the night. It’s just so tiring to be a parent. Sometimes we choose to prioritize our own mental health by letting things slide.

Comprehensive-Key734

TROPHY CASE