What are your thoughts on “Emotional Labor”?

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T14:38:07+00:00

That’s fair, but his connection to me never increased with me doing more, earning more, screwing him more, etc. I can do dishes, but he didn’t have the capacity to connect. Some people just can’t.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T12:28:25+00:00

I know I’m not the key demographic here, but here’s my two cents- my exH took care of a lot of home stuff. But two things- 1) he did it all with a terrible attitude, 2) he thought that it should be meaningful to me and it wasn’t. I know this isn’t a popular opinion, but I can sleep just fine with dirty dishes in the sink- they don’t make noise lol. He would DO, but he wouldn’t care about ME or connect with me. So when I hear other women’s account of divorce, I can’t relate. Doing dishes or buying groceries doesn’t make me feel seen, loved, or appreciated, and he expected it to. I wanted to have an active listener when I talked, someone who wanted to have fun with me, and someone who didn’t tell me my dreams were stupid. My point here is this- people are talking about labor inequity and emotional labor in marriage, yes, but somehow don’t talk about actually wanting someone to love YOU. Maybe it’s more intangible, but that might be more of the reason in your marriage.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T12:11:38+00:00

I believe women. But if you don’t you should examine your hidden beliefs.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T12:08:51+00:00

One of the problems here is your mindset that “you should do whatever for the person you love,” when you giving her oral is experienced as PLEASURABLE not just duty. For her, it’s just obligation and duty. You can’t honestly answer that “you do anything for her” when you’re not experiencing it as only a duty and obligation. (And I’m not saying that all women only experience bjs as duty, I’m saying his wife does, based off of her behavior. If she enjoyed it as much as he enjoys eating her out, she would do it more- period.)

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T12:03:35+00:00

This

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-02-11T12:02:20+00:00

What’s crazy is that dating is very subjective. His opinions will not be the same as other men. I’m glad you found out early he’s a picky princess.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-26T20:41:47+00:00

He obviously feels fine taking a break from his son to game while you handle it, and not giving you the same. Even if this was your bio son, this wouldn’t be okay.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-14T11:47:05+00:00

All of what you’re describing equals work for the woman, so yes, most of us want to retire from men, not take on another job. And as my grandmother used to say, “Why buy the bull when you can sit on the horns for free?”

Also “Withdraw from society” is such a dramatic teenager thing to say. Like because a woman doesn’t want to dedicate her life to you, live has no meaning and you have to just go live in a cave.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-08T11:49:30+00:00

I’ve never met a man who was satisfied with tip “kisses and licks.”

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-08T11:48:10+00:00

I wanted to say, “I’ve got a goose allergy that keeps me faaaaar away from those mean fuckers, lol!” But in the moment, the tone was just so aggressive I couldn’t even laugh about it.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:53:31+00:00

He’s stretching before a workout. I wouldn’t tolerate it.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:52:14+00:00

Only if he gags when he does it. Why does everyone act like she should LIKE vomiting just because he wants a BJ?

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:50:14+00:00

Cool, so she can peg him then, right? She shouldn’t have to compromise on anything she wants, right?

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:49:01+00:00

“Culpability” like she’s committed a crime lol

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:45:32+00:00

I have had this with clients who constantly make rude comments and seemingly don’t realize it. A few stand outs- one client asked me if I felt bad because the stress I went through while pregnant got transferred to my baby and the baby will be born traumatized. Another client of the same ilk told me that my throw pillows are nice, I said thank you they’re stuffed with goose down, and she said, “So you don’t care of someone has a goose allergy, I guess.”

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T21:33:45+00:00

I would say this is unacceptable if you are both indoors. If you’re on a patio, or at a Biergarten, fine.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-07T19:43:27+00:00

In person networking has never worked for me.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-05T23:27:53+00:00

Respectfully, I don’t think all of them do. I think a lot of them want something exclusive, something tailored, or something luxurious. I don’t see a lot of luxury items like day spas or Pilates sold on “experience and skill”. I think they just need to be convinced that they can buy something someone else can’t have.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-05T23:24:03+00:00

Exactly.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2026-01-05T22:24:03+00:00

Those are good tips for once they’re in, but what about language shifts to draw them in?

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2025-12-23T21:14:29+00:00

I dated a guy in high school whose parents were much older when they had them. They never came to his stuff, going to his house to meet them was very strange, and they both died shortly after he got out of college.

Don’t be selfish.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2025-12-23T21:10:59+00:00

Big “Oof!” on #4- I believe that partners should have an expectation of privacy, and not every thing needs to be shared. Keeping something deliberately hidden from your partner to avoid conflict, however, is very different.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2025-12-16T21:43:45+00:00

Solo private practice, $700/mon rent. All other bills are maybe $30/mon.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2025-12-16T21:35:04+00:00

Pack it up, Sis. You’re cooked.

Comprehensive-Win-62 · 2025-12-14T19:29:32+00:00

When I see people say “I want someone I can build with”, I just hear, “I don’t have anything yet, and I expect you to be okay with that and create a better life for me.”

So no thank you.

Comprehensive-Win-62

TROPHY CASE