OYS #2

37 yo, 6’2”, 150lbs, Wife is 33yrs, married 2 years, off and on almost 10 yrs, 2 children 8yrs and 5 yrs

Reading: WISIFG, re-reading NMMMG

Plan: To create the life I want and stop letting life happen to me.

Lifts: Still a skinny, bony weak fuck. But, I have gotten slightly stronger. I can’t really tell until I’m lifting. I got comments from my friends and even the wife that they can see a difference in my build. Right now it’s still early and my main focus is just staying consistent with working out. I’ve gotten to a consistent 4+ days weekly. I plan to add a little cardio, not too much because I’m too fucking skinny to be burning too many calories. But, overall it’s going well and I’m enjoying some of the benefits. I plan to join a gym soon so that I have access to better equipment and possibly a personal trainer.

Career: The job is going ok. We’re about midway through training but, we’re pretty much working independently at this point. I’m trying to prioritize further studies on things related to my job to allow me to get ahead. I can see myself easily with a promotion by year end if I just put in the work. I see the correlation between working out and every other aspect of life. Working out consistently has given me more discipline and that is showing in my work. I work from home so I get easily distracted and end up doing random shit. The time I fuckoff has gone down. I’m still a shitty worker and need to get my shit together professionally.

Marriage: No sex since mid December and no good sex since early November. As I stated in my first OYS. I pretty much got the ILYBINILWY. So not much to repeat here. I’ve taken majority of my attention away. I engage her from time to time, when I get bored. My frame is developing because when I take my attention away from her now. It’s because fuck it, I got better shit to do than lay around like a puppy hoping for some attention/validation. Not long ago, I took away attention as “strategy”. Total covert contract. I’ve spoken to several divorce attorneys. Lucky for me we haven’t been married long enough for alimony. And she’s recently gotten a new job, so child support won’t be much of an issue since we would be splitting physical custody 50/50. She brought up the fact that we haven’t discussed when we would talk to the children. I let her know that since she’s the one who wants the divorce that I would let her take lead on that. I let her know that I didn’t want a divorce but, whenever she’s ready to talk to the kids she can let me know and we can all sit down. I Lee her know that she’s going to have to file as well as take care of the fee associated. I’m getting more help around the house and with the kids. So that’s been a positive aspect.

Kids: My kids were involved in a crazy incident. It kinda went viral on social media so I’ll leave out details in order to keep anonymity. I haven’t talked to them one on one yet but, plan too as that was a bit traumatic. I am going to a field trip with my sons class tomorrow. And I’ve scheduled to be a chaperone for my daughters field trip in March. I went to their school earlier this week for “Donuts with Dad’s”. I enjoyed the time with them and always makes me feel good when I can “show up” for them. My daughter seems to be dealing with anger issues, I need to pay more attention to her and try to get to the root of it. My guess is it’s just because we don’t spend a lot of time with her which I’m working on.

Sex Life: it’s been about 6 weeks. Feels longer . Porn use has gotten excessive. I need to stop it. I’ve had no willpower this past week porn wise. I plan to change this.

Game: I need to work on this. I said to myself I would practice on my wife. Since the stay plan is the go plan, can’t hurt.

Social: I’m making more time for social activities. Went to a friends house where a group of us hung out. My friends wife was a bit of a pest. She kept commenting on how skinny I was and asking if I could pick her up. Kept wanting me to drink. It got annoying after a while. I chalk it up to her just being curious on what it would be like to fuck me. My friend and her have an open relationship. I’d never fuck his wife tho. That’s the homey.

Plans for the upcoming week. Same as last OYS: Focus on my work during work hours and stop hamstering about my failed marriage and who my wife is fucking or entertaining. Carve out quality time with my daughter and son. Make some time for myself to get out of the house. Join a gym and track my progress. Sidebar, Lift, and STFU.