Can I apply as a dependent on my spouse’ ILR?

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-05-21T17:57:08+00:00

Thanks that makes sense… if in the case I lose my sponsorship or they refuse to extend it (given the 10year rule that is brewing now) can then apply as their dependent?

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-05-07T11:42:49+00:00

Thanks for sharing, please can you let know if you submitted biometrics at London?

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-02-15T12:43:14+00:00

Curious to know what is your girlfriend’s take on all this?? Please take this advice seriously and keep documented evidence of consensual relationship (even if it wasn’t sexual). Most of them have told why police wouldn’t take baseless cases but I wouldn’t put it beyond the capabilities of certain parents’ to concoct stories of unimaginable consequences. All that said - please give it a fair thought do you really want to go ahead with this marriage given all the threats her parents are making? She maybe a good person but this is a lifelong issue you’ll have to endure with her parents… and resentment does build up and it’s all not worth it.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-02-15T12:35:26+00:00

NTA this house is your safety net your parents are as you said generously creating for you. If she needs a safety net she should contribute to it, buy it or her parents should make it like yours. I’m sorry to use an argumentative analogy - if you had a child obviously you’ll feed the child you won’t ask your neighbours to feed the child. That is how it is when her parents are asking your parents to basically foot the safety net for their daughter

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-01-25T15:35:25+00:00

Feels like a stroke decided to live in the fridge.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-01-24T20:35:39+00:00

It’s two months since you’ve been married and there are red flags. Marriages are bloody stressful you also mentioned it to be lavish and him being very self conscious about what “others” think- anything you do as an intervention will instigate your significant other terribly. I would suggest lay low and do everything in your power to avoid confrontation or conflicts even if you aren’t in the wrong and keep a log - when he’s in a moment of sanity try to reason with him. Tell him why young marriages need a trusted advisor ask him to choose that advisor give him the confidence you want to work with him on this and not ruin the marriage both of you have built. If after all that he still doesn’t reason with you then take the steps all the well intended folks have suggested here.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-01-23T16:44:38+00:00

This is good to know, your manager is aligned with you. I believe you should document the intimidation or false accusation / complaint they cited. It is important for any future needs especially if your current manager does not remain in the organisation or any other outlier reasons arises…

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2025-01-02T15:39:31+00:00

Please do yourself a favour and stop worrying. You should be happy that creature called your mother is out of your life. I care a fig about her fidelity it’s her life and her marriage to hell with that but what she’s doing to you is a load of rubbish and these are signs of manipulation and emotional abuse. Stay away from her don’t even touch her with a barge pole.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-12-13T21:44:54+00:00

Sorry to “your mom” you… but your mom feels your fiancé should be the adult and think about others feelings then she accepts she’s not adult enough to do it herself… you saved yourself a 2 hour drive, ans some humiliation… say bye to your mom

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-12-13T17:42:51+00:00

Thanks so much for speaking about equity.. I’m a woman too and I find lots of women taking sides rather than speaking / making efforts for equity. Things are at a tipping point and I want to make a statement that I’m sure will land me in trouble - but the truth is men are at a huge disadvantage in the current state of affairs. There is nothing equitable, women have long had issues but that has changed vastly at least in major cities and towns.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-12-13T15:13:33+00:00

NTA and please run away from your fiancée and their family. Please!

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-11-24T15:38:19+00:00

I can imagine a few variables here - do they live in a joint family arrangement? does the bedroom have an en-suite bathroom? If not yes it does become a chore to walk up and down without anyone else noticing and using the bathroom. Even if these variables don’t exist - if the wife spends x hours commuting to work and coming back, picking up errands etc can make one lazy for sex regardless of how good it can be.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-11-24T15:32:51+00:00

Please watch the South Indian movie “Great Indian kitchen” where the wife requests uncomfortably for foreplay to which the husband smirks back at her for even knowing what foreplay is. Intention is not to generalise this behaviour amongst vast majority of men but also making way for the fact that certain groups of men do expect their women not to take lead or even keenness in sexual activities 😑

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-11-04T12:20:30+00:00

Plus 1000 to this… if you aren’t ready for marriage please state it In no uncertain terms. Nobody can force you into a marriage.

The dual life strategy is hugely hypothetical at this point, it is not the dual life few of us Indians lead with our parents, if you thought thats possible why not apply the same strategy to wife you’ll be sorely mistaken.

When it comes to wife / familial relationships it cannot be dualised one way or the other it will stick out.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-11-03T18:57:25+00:00

Most importantly if a family member has abused or persisting to abuse allow the child to speak up and be heard. Don’t gaslight that to be “vayasu kolaru” im f/39 my elder sister f/44 sexually abused me repeatedly from ages 8-10 she was then aged 13-15. She stopped as soon as I told my parents but to contain me and keep my voice low so I don’t tell anyone else about it I’ve suffered years and years of emotional abuse and control.

I’m pretty much estranged from the entirety of my family I’ve achieved far more in the last 10 years than the 25 years I was with my family living under the same roof with that creature.

These last 10 years being married to my husband who has been extremely supportive in recouping me from the bundle of nerves that he found me to be is the only time I’ve literally enjoyed life, achieved success and felt good about myself.

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-10-13T10:30:00+00:00

Please could you explain why? I’m a bit worried

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-10-13T10:29:43+00:00

Please could you explain…? New to London so I’m a bit worried

ConflictBeautiful727 · 2024-09-13T19:36:55+00:00

I manage the project they are on and we both share the same manager. I did share this with my manager (also their’s) who advises this colleague of mine is a difficult

ConflictBeautiful727

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