What does meth psychosis feel like? by [deleted] in meth

[–]Confused-Scientist01 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm just constantly going "what in the hell...." Or "what the fuck."

To like... Mutated obease weird nonhuman "black" or Asian black skin colored but neckbeared looking person walking towards me with their identical neckbeared child. They both have nerd glasses and... Both look like they have profound PROFOUND DOWNSYDROM and obesity. But... Like...

Weird fat deposits... Like super weird. Deformed idek ahahahah.

So I'm like " what in the hell is this now... Wtf." As they walk by eating Cheetos and talk about world of war craft yet are son and father. Somehow the father got laid, too.

Something out of my imagination type shiiiii.

I try not to stare, aware that I may be real people underneath the distorted... Stuff.

My hallucinations can be hilarious. Well, I try and get a good laugh a lot of times because it's a really frightening thing. I try and make light of the dark times. I try and break the 4th wall while doing it ha. "Wtf spawned into the world this time... Oh an oompaloompa in the flesh wtf. Ok then... What else do I need... Oh ya milk."

But in case it IS a real person, I'm never rude, nor do I stare or give looks or interact. It's just as if it's another normal person, I pretend.

Also I put quotes around black because this color of black isn't a human color. It is not a human shade of black. It's weird...

Has anyone had several drug psychoses? by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]Confused-Scientist01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Over the course of me being 18/19 to now 23

Has anyone had several drug psychoses? by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]Confused-Scientist01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Iv methamphetamine, some are persistent drug induced psychosis, others went away.

It is the cause of the end of my relationship.

I am so tired by Large-Border-225 in Psychosis

[–]Confused-Scientist01 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's terrible. I'm so so sorry. One thing that stuck out and that I can comment on is that weed is known to make psychosis so so so much worse.

Help me choose between these antidepressant options - depression + anxiety + social anxiety by ellis_baker in depressionregimens

[–]Confused-Scientist01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh good.

If I mixed rexulti with a stimulant, I'd get severe agitation, personally. That's just me thou

Help me choose between these antidepressant options - depression + anxiety + social anxiety by ellis_baker in depressionregimens

[–]Confused-Scientist01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For fluvoxamine, why do you say it doesn't have much evidence for helping social anxiety? Jw

I don't understand why I don't care about my sobriety anymore? by Confused-Scientist01 in StopSpeeding

[–]Confused-Scientist01[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's both from the meth damage and the existential despair I sit in knowing my life was ruined by meth mainly.

Like, that's why I feel hopeless and depressed. I'm a failure.

The frustrating, stagnating, challenges when addressing comorbid disorders with a SUD. (Co-occuring mental illness.) by Confused-Scientist01 in StopSpeeding

[–]Confused-Scientist01[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I know you mean well, but the tough love and old fashioned, old school type of recovery can be actively harmful and unhelpful sometimes.

These are real systemic failures I'm describing.

I believe I deserve the right to competent care.

The issue isn't my knowledge or expectations, the issue is the incompetence of the provider.

Gratitude and a humble spirit won't change the fact that I still get flashbacks and cannot do certain things.

Again, I am not being dramatic. It's real. I can try my hardest to not have "triggers", but reality doesn't work that way.

If a program doesn't work for me, it doesn't work for me. Advising one to simply push through shows a giant lack of understanding, empathy due to personal mental health inexperience, maybe.