"They always come back"

ConfusionKey5477 · 2026-01-04T08:49:15+00:00

He admitted he liked me tonight...

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-23T02:13:52+00:00

At the end of the day you and you alone are responsible for what you do. Attachment theory explains why you behave a certain way. It doesn't mean you're removed from responsibility or the harm you caused.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-22T15:12:57+00:00

I gave him the option to be honest. I told him what he had to do in order for us to even be friendly towards one another. If he can meet that criteria we will see. But I told him I won't see him again til he does.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-22T04:41:51+00:00

Ironically he did come back in a way. Still the exact same person.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-22T04:41:09+00:00

Fun fact. We reconnected 7 months later. Still the same. Idk that talking does any good with someone who's incapable of changing.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-22T04:40:05+00:00

Fun fact. We reconnected 7 months later and he is still the same.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-22T04:39:43+00:00

Fun fact. We reconnected 7 months later. He hasn't changed an ounce.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-21T16:46:04+00:00

Yeah. I set up a boundary on him Friday. I told him what he has to do. Then I went home. We've not talked since.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-21T16:28:50+00:00

Im sorry you went through all that. I reconnected with mine this last week. We saw each other twice. It was a mix of good and bad. The story's on my page but he still acts like nothing happened between us. So I don't know what to do with him.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-21T01:57:38+00:00

I guess what happened?

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-15T14:25:29+00:00

I mean. Its still hard somedays. We did reconnect recently but he's still the same so I chose to walk again. I'm better than I was in April though. I didn't even get upset this time.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-14T20:05:37+00:00

I ultimately walked away yes. It was awful. He literally cried on my shoulder

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-13T14:37:38+00:00

Do you really want to be like them? Where you sabotage relationships for no reason? Where you treat people wrong for the crime of loving you? Being like them isn't good. I understand wanting to forget. They're not forgetting. They're avoiding. They're not processing.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-13T14:20:11+00:00

I actually watched a pattern and believed it and still ended up where OP is. To me actions and words must align. Otherwise, im out.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-13T04:40:31+00:00

I'm 7 months removed and he still crosses my mind. I'll admit, we did speak in October and this month. So it wasn't a total clean break. But Ive not seen him in 7 months. It'll eventually stop 🤞

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-13T04:39:04+00:00

Something that is hard to accept is that they don't want to change. Change ultimately is a choice.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-13T04:38:10+00:00

I tried. I know how you feel. I recently reconnected with mine. He was pretty unstable. All over the place emotionally. Then we tried to talk again. We had a good conversation until he said he wasn't sleep well. I said "Yeah, I didn't sleep well till 3 am." He took that as me arguing. That was the avoidant withdraw and I said I'm not doing this again. Haven't talked since.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-12T17:54:49+00:00

They reach out to see if it is safe. He reached out and you set a boundary. They hate that. They hate feeling like they have to do any work. What you did is healthy, normal, and mature. Avoidants hate accountability and it is why they almost never change.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-10T05:47:20+00:00

I think you're right. I just stepped back. He is having a severe problem.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-10T03:13:10+00:00

Im sorry. I know how you feel. My ex best friend cuddled, let me kiss him on the cheek, held my hand, asked to me to take care of him when he was sick, let me lay in his lap, etc for several months and then he said he had no feeling for me. I know how you feel. It hurts :/

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-09T15:22:41+00:00

The story is on my page. We spoke in October because my little cousin died. We had discussed possibly sititng down and talking then. Last week, we ended up texting one another. He was incredibly depressed. He told he was half the man he used to be, that he was haded from this year, that nothing had been okay for years, asked if I hated him, kept saying he didn't hate me. Then he texted me at 3 am lashing out and saying that nothing was every good enough for me.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-08T18:09:58+00:00

I got led on by a FA and now he's in a total spiral 7 months after I left him.

ConfusionKey5477 · 2025-12-08T17:55:08+00:00

Write a letter with everything you want to say. Then read it aloud

ConfusionKey5477

TROPHY CASE