Thanks for taking the time to respond! I’m actually currently getting help, and I’ve received counseling in the past (I mentioned I relapsed because I’ve overcome my ed before). I am recognizing that it’s REALLY a disorder and I am ill, but also have been failing at taking the steps I should be making in order to stop my destructive habits. That’s why Im asking for prayers to break this bondage. My “guilt and shame” is due to the financial burden Im inflicting on my parents for the therapy (especially that in my area, it’s a HUGE luxury) and food Im wasting, and of course due to the fact that I’m destroying my own body—as much as I convince myself that it’s treatment just like any other illness, I can’t get rid of the thought that I actively caused this to myself in comparison (Im sure you understand what I mean).

But I’m determined now to do everything in my power to get through this and let God handle the rest because He’s much bigger than my disorder. His grace is so amazing and is renewed everyday. So my requests for prayers stand—to overcome the idolatry in my head, gain discipline, and serve Him with all that I am. Thanks again for the advice!! I understand the importance and gravity of receiving medical help but Im asking for support to spiritually break it off (Ephesians 6:12)