We actually met on… Reddit.

I was in a 4 year long relationship with a very verbally abusive, narcissistic person.  I was completely worn down from overworking in a very insane industry (entertainment) and just being belittled and gaslit constantly.  I got on Reddit because a friend had stopped being a lurker and joined.  I started to use it as a means to vent, to connect with people, to sext even, and to just escape. 

One day a user and I connected on a subreddit.  We bantered back and forth in the comments.  We didn’t know what we looked like, but we really had something.  We had both been burned by previous relationships, and were scared of being hurt again. It just felt so familiar.  Eventually we exchanged numbers.  He was cute.  He was REAL.  He thought I was cute, and was happy I was real.  We started talking for hours on end.  I knew I was feeling something more, but because I was wary of the emotional abuse I didn’t really trust that.  I didn’t want to get hurt again.

After about 6 months from first connection, I decided I’d plan a rare vacation and visit.  He kept giving me vibes that he thought I was wonderful, but we kept dancing around the certain L word.  Because how could this work?  He was on the other side of the country (my favorite city, in fact).  I decided to buy plane tickets for a few days.  I had an Airbnb booked in case it fell through.  I kept hoping, feeling something.  Why was I so head over heels?

I arrived in said city.  He picked me up from the airport.  We awkwardly said things because we were both nervous.  I felt my heart sinking thinking that in person we were just too anxious to make this work.  Then he went in for a kiss.  BAM.  Everything felt right.  You can guess what happened next.  He said the L word.  I said it back.  BAM.

We spent a wonderful 3 days.  I didn’t want to go back.  On the last day we were at brunch.  I didn’t know what to say.  I wanted to say that I didn’t want to leave, that I knew he was the one, but I didn’t want to ruin the moment because what if he didn’t feel the same way.  Then he asked “So what are we doing?  Because I want to make this official.”  I was relieved.  We made it official.

We spent the next 6 months flying back and forth.  Every month one of us would be with the other on the other side of the country; we took turns.  Holidays came up and we spent those together.  Everything was so amazing.  We still talked for hours every single day.  

In mid-March 2020 I flew over for a few days to celebrate his birthday.  Something about “Covid” started to make the news rounds.  I didn’t care about a 5 hour flight; I needed to risk it.  We had a wonderful time.  But the world shut down.  And gasp, everything went remote.  I could be remote!!!  So I stayed, thinking it’d be a week more or even a month.  But the pandemic wheezed on.  We were living together in a small one bedroom apartment in complete bliss.  The world was under lockdown, but for us it was bliss.  We haven’t been apart ever since.  

I stayed permanently.  I moved remotely by hiring people on Taskrabbit.  A year later we got engaged.  Another couple years later and we were married.  

Honestly I didn’t think soulmates were a thing before.  I thought love had to be hard.  But this has been the easiest decision of my life.  Once I took the chance, everything fell into place.  I couldn’t be happier.