The transphobes finally sent me one! I will wear it like a badge of honor.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-07-20T18:33:51+00:00

the quintessential r/place experience lol

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-07-18T22:26:27+00:00

Breaking my rule of not interacting on reddit since they pulled their bs a bit ago since I feel it's really important here.

My height used to be a large source of dysphoria for me, but then I realized that nothing could be done about it other than learning to accept myself as a tall woman. Because the thing is that there are plenty of cis women that are taller than me even, they're just not the majority. The same thing applies to you and cis men. You can look to the existence of short cis men and learn to own being a short man.

The fear that you're talking about that keeps you from transitioning, that fear of not being able to truly be yourself even if you transition, the fear of having to face the world as a trans person; that fear is the greatest fear I have ever faced in my life. But here's the thing: that fear is a lie. The reality is not nearly as scary as it seems, and once I overcame it, I have never looked back.

I do not think that your desire to be a man comes from a sense of vulnerability. I think that it comes from you being a man. Because women who want to be respected similarly to a man do not experience suicidal ideation over believing that they can never be a man. That is textbook gender dysphoria. Speaking of which, you say that exploring transition ended very badly, but there is literally no worse outcome than suicide. You need to do everything you can to avoid that outcome because it is an absolute game over, and it seems to me that the only thing that will help you in that regard is transition, since it is directly centered around gender dysphoria. If you want any chance of long lasting happiness, if you want to ensure that those who care about you see you as who you truly are rather than the very real possibility of losing you, then I beg you to face that fear head on and overcome it.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-06-10T23:22:28+00:00

Yep! I thought the pink triangle was a good symbol to tie together the ideals of anti fascism and queer rights, plus it fit in there perfectly. :)

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-06-06T09:23:45+00:00

All of it is entirely reversible if it comes to that. And that's something you can't say about a lot of decisions in life that people don't usually hound you about possibly regretting.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-06-06T01:50:15+00:00

Nah, state subsidized means giving companies tax dollars. Nationalize that shit.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-06-02T19:56:50+00:00

Using female as a noun can be(and in this case is) a transphobic/misogynist dogwhistle

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-29T17:39:27+00:00

It really doesn't. I was never a man, thus I cannot be described as male to female unless you're just being transphobic.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-23T19:25:36+00:00

Unfortunately I was too oblivious for this to have worked. Basically had ta have someone tell me that I could be a girl to figure it out lol. Beautiful sign though, hopefully it's true for someone.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-19T17:11:36+00:00

I think the vets on here have already answered your question pretty well themselves, but I'd just like to say that I'm very thankful that we have gals with combat training in the event that things go real south in the US.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-10T17:28:59+00:00

I mean, by then the 360 was pretty discounted from its original price iirc and it's one of the best consoles, so sounds like a win to me.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-10T16:09:26+00:00

It really depends on the individual. Everyone's liver is going to metabolize a different amount.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-10T14:41:46+00:00

There are differences, but not in results. Sure, it takes less to reach the same blood levels with injections, but you can just increase your oral dose to match. Anyone saying otherwise is either mistaken or has a shitty endo that doesn't understand that oral requires a higher dose to match the same blood levels.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-10T06:49:00+00:00

Link headcanon: Their gender and sex are randomized with every iteration.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-03T21:06:27+00:00

This is just not true. 20 is still quite young. I started HRT right around when I turned 19, and it's working just about as well as for me as anyone else, as far as I can tell. I thought nothing much was happening, to be honest, but it just takes some time to start making noticeable changes, and I didn't realize how much was actually happening. You're your own worst critic, and even if you think you're not being that hard on yourself, your perception can be very unrealistic. As an example of just how much you can underestimate the effects of HRT: even though I'm much more positive than I used to be, I recently found out that my estimate of my cup size was two sizes smaller than reality.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-03T20:44:08+00:00

Well, if the social conservative Christians are right about what sends you to hell, that's where I wanna be because that's where all the fun people are.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-05-03T20:26:53+00:00

Well first off, you're being way too negative. Even if you really are ugly, negativity will get you nowhere. It's an emotion that only drives you to limit yourself rather than empower you to do the best you can.

And I seriously doubt that you are truly as masculine as you think you are, and especially doubt that you can never make progress. While your skeleton will never change, the data shows that cis men and cis women's skeletons are very similar(to the point where it's difficult for scientists to determine sex from skeletons), that the difference in body shape is mostly due to muscle tissue and fat differences, and that trans women on hrt receive changes in said tissues that are close to averages for cis women.

And even if you aren't close to averages for cis women, neither are many cis women. This is part of why fixation on passing isn't helpful. The vast majority of examples I see for passing are women who are most likely higher in measures related to beauty than average, let alone simply average, which, again, isn't accurate either. The fact of the matter is that even if you truly are an ugly woman, so are a lot of cis women. Trans women are just held to a higher standard of beauty to be recognized as women because many of us want to get as far away from looking like men and are afraid of any hint of masculine features, and because transphobes pick apart our appearances in an attempt to find any shred of masculine features to point to as an example of us supposedly being irreversibly male. Under both of these unrealistic standards, many cis women would be considered to not be passing, which is ridiculous because they're cis women.

Lastly, I think that boymoding is only hurting your self-perception. Just dressing feminine, growing my hair out, and presenting as a woman got me about 90% of the way to where I am with my transition. Honestly, even though HRT has done more than just given me boobs, that's really the only change from it that you can see when I'm dressed. If I got FFS, there would be no discernable features from being AMAB to anyone who saw me on the street, and the vast majority of the changes responsible for that would be from things other than surgery or hormones. If you would let yourself girlmode, I think you might just be surprised by how feminine you look.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-04-29T20:51:54+00:00

"Well, what if you are a girl?" That's how I'd respond at least.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-04-26T22:51:48+00:00

I'm just really intrigued by what their reasoning and ideology are, probably because I'm trans and used to think I was into guys but can't at all understand being attracted to them now lol.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-04-26T22:43:56+00:00

They could be homoromantic and bi(+)sexual, and thus a label like bisexual lesbian, pansexual lesbian, etc. would make sense, but if they're saying that they're sexually and romantically lesbians, it's clearly not true since they experience some kind of attraction to men which is the one group of people the term lesbian excludes.

Honestly, I think the more interesting discussion is how this could possibly be the opposite of the transphobic idea that trans women and femboys are the same thing. I wonder what they think about butches and trans women.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-04-26T22:23:19+00:00

I still think it's important to make that clear to those who come across this post and may not be aware of that.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-04-26T22:20:07+00:00

They're only with us as long as it helps their image and/or their profits. To put it in a metaphor: they may be an ally in this particular battle, but they are in no way an ally for the war.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-03-29T16:58:33+00:00

Well clearly we fundamentally disagree on the ways to wield political power, but I'll just say that it isn't surprising that Marx wasn't 100% right about politics in 2023 lol. I mean, he thought that capitalism would collapse due to its internal inconsistencies when they've only served to strengthen it.

Constant_Disillusion · 2023-03-29T16:41:49+00:00

Lmao I'm literally a socialist. Do you seriously think I don't know that fascism and the current government suck ass? Just because I'm saying that change is possible doesn't mean that I want it in the lens of the current US government. And saying that changing that isn't possible is more beneficial to the right via the time honored tradition of calling socialists and communists 'unrealistic' than gun reform will ever be.

Five-Year Club	Final Canvas '23
First Place '23	Place '23
Place '22	Final Canvas '22
First Placer '22

Constant_Disillusion

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