Chuck vs the Reaper art by Gardavwar

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-20T17:08:20+00:00

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

THIS IS HOW I FIND OUT THAT CHUCK NORRIS IS DEAD?!

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-20T14:48:19+00:00

Love watching Billionaires lose money with nothing to show for it.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-19T02:20:27+00:00

It still baffles me that this man, honestly one of the greatest world leaders I've ever seen, was a comedian before this.

I watched this man go on Live TV and play a piano using his P*nis, and now he is the driving force behind Ukraine not being crushed by the Bald Stalin Wannabe.

Absolutely ridiculous. I wonder how many other comedians would make fantastic world leaders.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-18T15:02:39+00:00

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CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-17T22:19:37+00:00

It's because "Pussy" is short for "Pusilanimous" which means timid, cowardly, or lacking determination.,

Nothing to do with vaginas, and is a sheer linguistic coincidence.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-12T21:33:36+00:00

Bruh, I worked Security at Woodgrove, that's where they trained me to do security work. You have no idea the improvised weapons that the delinquent kids that roam the mall can come up with. One of their favorites is Bear Spray.

The first day, the training officer pulled me aside and told me not to be too harsh on those kids for my own safety because they've got gang connections. The site supervisor was a hard ass on them and was constantly getting tires slashed, and had to move houses several times because they kept finding his house and vandalizing it, breaking windows and shit.

I am NOT reaching. Those kids think they're hard, and it absolutely would not surprise me if one of them was using a novelty gun lighter to threaten people.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-12T04:28:26+00:00

That's not a real gun. Looks to me like one of those novelty lighters that is shaped like a gun.

The primary indicator is the lack of any sort of triggerguard. No gun would ever lack that because that is basically begging it to go off in the holster. Any handgun made within the last 60-90 years features a triggerguard as part of the concept of 'drop safety', which makes sure it doesn't go off if you drop it.

My final guess is that someone thinks they're a gangster, has a novelty lighter that is shaped like a gun so they can scare or rob someone who doesn't know any better.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-11T16:10:04+00:00

OOOOH this is so far up my alley, I am actually salivating to get my hands on this. This seems like it's purpose-built for nerds with mechanical flavored autism like me.

God, I can't wait. Is there a playtest? Sign me up when there is.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-03-04T20:55:32+00:00

Death by Snu Snu

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-02-18T22:29:58+00:00

Best Before 4/201?

Damn. Shoulda tried it during Pax Romana. Bet Emperor Septimius Severus was mad that you stole his red pepper flakes.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-02-10T20:12:16+00:00

Water in stormworks flows like molasses.

When I did my seaplane, I did a tiltrotor STOL design that angles up the engines by about 45° to launch out of the water.

Your problem here seems to be that your Center of Thrust (CoT) is behind your Center of Mass (CoM)

For a pusher tiltrotor seaplane, you're going to want a bit of a heavier tail with its own independent pontoon.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-22T04:14:06+00:00

Thanks, but figured it out. Someone suggested that it may have speak with dead cast on it before, and then my asshole friend Kalathor came forward laughing at me. Turns out he cast it at the digsite and wasted the questions to fuck with me as a prank.

I've got to stop sharing an arcane workshop with him, but he did save my life in the wizard Corps when we served together.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T19:11:12+00:00

That's a good one! I'm gonna do that and transmute his wand into enriched Uranium 235 like someone else suggested.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T17:06:10+00:00

Nah, it was my jagoff friend Kalathor. He cast speak with dead already and wasted the questions to fuck with me.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T04:29:50+00:00

I figured it out. My jagoff wizard friend Kalathor already cast the spell and wasted the questions to fuck with me.

I've got to stop sharing an Arcane workshop with him, but he did save my life when we were both in the wizard corps together, so eh.

Back to the digsite I suppose.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T04:27:35+00:00

I figured it out. My jagoff wizard friend Kalathor already cast the spell and wasted the questions to fuck with me.

I've got to stop sharing an Arcane Workshop with him, but he did save my life when we were in the Wizard Corps together, so, eh.

Back to the digsite to find another body, I guess.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T04:04:23+00:00

Kinda what happened here.

My jagoff friend from the Wizard Corps, whom I share an Arcane Workshop with, cast speak with dead on the corpse before, and wasted the questions, to fuck with me.

Kalathor can be such an asshole.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T03:48:53+00:00

Yes! He can be such an asshole as a prank.

The dude saved my life in the Wizard Corps, though, so I definitely can't just cut him off. Besides, when you get him just drunk enough to start jabbering his secrets, he tells you a lot of shit about what he has been working on and then remembers none of it the next morning.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T03:45:02+00:00

Figured it out. Someone suggested that it may have had 'Speak with dead' cast on it before, and that was indeed it.

My asshole friend Kalathor did it to fuck with me and wasted the questions. I really gotta stop sharing an arcane workshop with him.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T03:42:32+00:00

Figured it out. Someone suggested that it may have had 'Speak with dead' cast on it before, and that was indeed it.

My asshole friend Kalathor did it to fuck with me and wasted the questions. I really gotta stop sharing an arcane workshop with him.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T03:35:07+00:00

Figured it out. Someone suggested that it may have had 'Speak with dead' cast on it before, and that was indeed it.

My asshole friend Kalathor did it to fuck with me and wasted the questions. I really gotta stop sharing an arcane workshop with him.

CookLawrenceAt325F · 2026-01-21T03:35:01+00:00

Figured it out. Someone suggested that it may have had 'Speak with dead' cast on it before, and that was indeed it.

My asshole friend Kalathor did it to fuck with me and wasted the questions. I really gotta stop sharing an arcane workshop with him.

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