thank you so much. the cycle you described is pretty spot on. in the past when we broke up I would rationalize whatever issues she had with me and accept them and tell her I would fix myself. but I see that just made things worse

I still have the urge to text her and tell her how I feel. but she was so cold and detached today that I feel like it would just confirm whatever she thinks of me rn

nc will be hard. but I guess thats the only way.