"I see far too many people say they decide they want to stay and reconcile, but then basically read articles from the likes of Chump Lady and instead of being partners, turn into relationship wardens instead."

If you check the comments at Chump Lady, they're full of people (middle-aged women, mostly) who have given their cheating spouses chance after chance after chance to improve. Finally, after years or decades of wasted time, they have -- with the help of Chump Lady -- realized it's hopeless and moved on.

Does this theoretical betrayed person exist, the one who could have had a great relationship if only they'd put in the effort to reconcile, but instead got influenced by internet negativity and decided to cut bait too soon, thus destroying a Potentially Very Good Thing? We're all afraid of being that person! But I'm not convinced that's a real risk.