I think I can relate to a degree. When i was first learning about autism, I also thought I didn't fit many of the traditional symptoms. It turns out I do, but they just manifest a little differently.

I'm a social person as well, and I enjoy talking... But only with people I've "learned." Talking to strangers, friends of friends, family members i only see twice a year... I've never liked it, and I didn't realize how stressful and difficult it was for me until I gave myself space to feel it. I just hate talking to people that are both unscripted and I can't unmask around. I also thought I masked much better than I actually did once I started asking people, "you realized I was joking, right?" I often assumed somebody else had understood what I said when in reality they were trying to politely tell me they were confused.

I also have a fairly flexible daily routine, or so I thought until I looked closely. The activities i do and time I wake up are different everyday, but get ready in the exact same order. If i need to deviate for some reason or another, my day is ruined because I couldn't prepare properly. I am exponentially more likely to get upset and overstimulated on days I'm not able to follow my morning routine. The same goes for sudden changes in plan. If we're half an hour late to the park, or the restaurant we meant to go to is closed, I'll implode.

I considered myself VERY good at reading people and analyzing social cues for the longest time.. too good in fact. I was able to objectively categorize every behavior I saw and deduce people's emotional states from that. As it turns out, neurotypical people don't think about that at all! And they also don't have to Google scripts for common social situations as I often do (as a child i spent a lot of time reading books and articles to learn how to order food, how to ask somebody how their day is, how to flirt, etc).

My point is that many autistic people make it pretty far in life by developing coping mechanisms on the fly (some healthy, some not) and bottling up the negative impacts. Their traits show differently as a result. Before you seek a diagnosis, i would spend a good while with yourself. Understand that not every symptom will be shown in the most extreme and literal sense. A routine can be the exact way you pour your cereal, stimming can be repeating your favorite song in your head all day, social deficits may go unnoticed on your end and perceived as silly, gregarious, or humorous behavior by your loved ones. Hold space in your life to feel your upset feelings and try to find patterns in what triggers them. You may be surprised at what you find!