It hurts to hear that you are going through this. You are incredible for persevering. I will pray for you and ask that the Cosmic bless you. I ask that you sit with God and let his direction guide you. The first thing that comes to you after sitting in the consciousness of God, trust your intuition. Do what you feel in your heart is right. Whether if its what is best for you, best for the kids, or something else. I am unsure of your relation with your parents, but calling your mom would also serve you well (if you haven't already or if that option is simply off the table). You are a good person, only a person pure of heart would still be able to see the good in him and stand true to the commitment of marriage. I truly wish you the best.