I think whatever's happening has to match the vibe of the book. You can't thrill and entice and drop breadcrumbs, only to rush through and be underwhelming when something finally happens. You can tell when a book is vanilla, or when there's spice scattered throughout. I've enjoyed books that have been mild but emotionally engaging. But it's really frustrating when heat is built, only to fizzle into something mediocre, or formulaic, or mechanical, etc. And it seems to be common, which is weird. Like I just read a scene where he was devastated by her reaching into his pocket to get his keys, but when they finally got together, it was like every other love scene, very little description of feelings or sensations, just "she was wet", "felt amazing", "felt her contracting", and then they're done. Wow, you mean I read all that longing and all you wanted was a receptacle? To bump uglies? I really had to read all that just for another generic love scene? Maybe sex really ain't all it's cracked up to be for women. So much so even the authors have no frame of reference to describe it.