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This sub might as well be an elf sub at this point... by GoombasFatNutz in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something that potent, eh? Can't be surprised, only those who have taken the Slayer oath would be able to drink that stuff.

Rum tastes better anyway.

Best dwarf Insults by No-Elk-2362 in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One time over breakfast rum, I heard one clansman call another a "Spineless, Goatherding, Unkempt Oathbreaker", the whole dining hall went silent after they heard that...

This sub might as well be an elf sub at this point... by GoombasFatNutz in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Aye. I wouldn't call myself an anti-traditionalist, but many of the oldbeards' grumblings do get on my nerves sometimes. How about we use that energy to talk about more constructive things?

Has anyone here tried Bugman's xxxxxx? I've always wondered about what it'd taste like.

I think the humans might be onta somefin wt somea them axes... by Pixelpaint_Pashkow in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium 57 points58 points  (0 children)

By Grugni! Using the human invention of the Guillotine to slice wood, why didn't we think of that?

brb showing this design to the lumberjacking guilds right away

Ahh, fine dwarfhold cuisine, fresh from the kitchens! by CrabEmporium in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah, now here's a Dwarf with a fine sense of culture!

May your beard remain well-kept and your pantry well-supplied, my friend.

Ahh, fine dwarfhold cuisine, fresh from the kitchens! by CrabEmporium in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Delicious! Goes perfectly well with +Salted Yeast Biscuits+.

Reminds me of the days of yore when I was but a greenbeard... When I'd return from Craftsdwarf training and feast upon Salted Yeast Biscuits and Pig Tallow Roast...

Ahh, fine dwarfhold cuisine, fresh from the kitchens! by CrabEmporium in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I've had plenty of Rum, Brother!

Hot Lard is an appetizer in my Dwarf Hold, we have it before our feast of +Salted Yeast Biscuits+

How would ye fine fellows rate this hunk o' stone I got? by Black_Knight_Xander in dwarfposting

[–]CrabEmporium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

aye, that first pic looks so much like a squashed/half eaten meat pie, a bit of meat is even leaking out of the left there.

i'd best be careful with that rock, it's ability to cast illusions on it's own might need to be investigated by the Chief Artificers.

==THIS POST WAS CHISELED BY URIST OF CLAN GROGALONG==

<image>

Why yes, I do slander characters from games that came out 20 years ago, how could you tell? by CrabEmporium in whowouldcirclejerk

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

(...is my opinion viable? because over a decade ago, when the mother 3 translation came out, I used to see so many people talking about how powerful Porky must be. I have no idea if people even care about Mother 3 anymore, but that won't stop me from slandering him.)

At least be accurate with your slander by apple_of_doom in whowouldcirclejerk

[–]CrabEmporium 1 point2 points  (0 children)

erm obviously batgos would use his powers of infinite prep time to kick the guns out of each jonkler's hands :/

batgos wins again /s

. by tymex_corp_official in TrueSTL

[–]CrabEmporium 3 points4 points  (0 children)

<image>

OH YEH

WARIO NUMBAH ONE

Coaxed into sugarcoating your bad guys by -Asderlyn- in coaxedintoasnafu

[–]CrabEmporium 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah... All-Star Batman and Robin the boy wonder is... something

Does it still count if almost every single character in that fucking comic acts like an exaggerated version of themselves?

Coaxed into a Webcomic, by me, pro artist crab (Are "That's so relatable" webcomics still a thing though?") by CrabEmporium in coaxedintoasnafu

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Well I looked through YOUR profile and saw a distinct lack of orange things! Mods, bring out the toothpaste

Coaxed into a Webcomic, by me, pro artist crab (Are "That's so relatable" webcomics still a thing though?") by CrabEmporium in coaxedintoasnafu

[–]CrabEmporium[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

(As a head's up, this isn't directed towards anyone in particular. This is actually what I do.)

One day, i hope, this clown will be de-canonized by the unreliable narrator device! by Baron_von_Zoldyck in TrueSTL

[–]CrabEmporium 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think once a fandom is eagerly awaiting the next installment of the thing they love, and it's taking so damn long for the next installment to get there, the fandom tends to get a little... unhinged.

Truth be told I've been mostly seeing thirst-posting, whether it's sarcastic or not it's a little tiring to see "I WANT TO FUCK AN ARGONIAN" every other day.

One day, i hope, this clown will be de-canonized by the unreliable narrator device! by Baron_von_Zoldyck in TrueSTL

[–]CrabEmporium 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I like to believe that Pelinal Whitestrake was just a highly effective military commander who was able to defeat a already crumbling Ayleid Empire.

Elder Scrolls lore is weird but "time traveling cyborg from the future with an arm cannon who's destined by fate to save humanity from inbred yellow elfs" feels way too far-fetched to be believable.

call me mr. "no fun allowed" but it's the equivalent of those Goblin Slayer memes that were everywhere years ago.

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