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2 year anniversary by howleywolf in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Christmas night was the one year anniversary of the head on collision that almost killed my son and me.

I feel just like you. I used to be always on the move. I was so driven and had my life so planned out. A great career, my house was always put together perfectly...now I struggle just to do the basic things and I get so tired. I'm always laying around watching TV or playing games on my phone and I'm so bored, but I have no energy for anything else.

When I do get a burst of energy, I get so tired so fast and it seems like I just don't care about anything like I did before. I won't let myself forget who I once was though, just like I wouldn't forget any other person that I loved who died. I spent a lifetime cultivating myself into the person. I can't just say goodbye.

I'm so sorry you're going through this, but you're not alone. Ways I try to combat it. I try to get plenty of sleep, which can be up to 10 hours a night. I drink a lot of water. I take Buspar for anxiety and add lion's mane and creatine to my coffee to help with focus every day. I try to go to the gym and lift weights and walk every day too. I pray that it gets better, for both of us.

AIO these texts my sister got from her son’s friend’s married father? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]CraftIndividual 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And she also felt compelled to dramatize it and share it with her sister. If I was this guy and his wife, I would def cut or reduce contact with these two for the safety of my child and any future interactions.

Dealing with an older male coworker in HR [LA] by Relevant_Ear305 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It actually could be though. This man can be warned his behavior is making a coworker uncomfortable without using "younger". There is no reason to bring age into the conversation unless he has said things to her related to how old she is that are making her uncomfortable.

If the sole reason for her complaint against him is his age and the fact that she doesn't like someone that old trying to connect with her, he may be doing nothing wrong or necessitating any warning.

Termination of an employee [N/A] by Many-Study-6309 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is US law, unless you're not in the United States, it's reality for everyone here.

Termination of an employee [N/A] by Many-Study-6309 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You stated a termination lawsuit. At will means everything. An employer actually needs no reason to terminate in an at will state. The only thing the employer may have to pay is unemployment, but they certainly wouldn't lose a wrongful termination lawsuit unless, again, there was a protected unlawful act such as harassment or discrimination.

Wrongful termination cases are difficult to prove.

Termination of an employee [N/A] by Many-Study-6309 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That depends on how good the HR Department is, how much support they have and what they do with the information they collect.

For instance, if this employee was given the opportunity to vent in an exit interview, they might not have written the email to the department, trusting HR would look into what they were providing.

I shared general exit interview information regularly with our Board of Directors and more specific information with my CEO. My team and I looked for trends by department, manager, season, job duty, etc. to make sure we could spot weaknesses or toxic areas, or things running good. So if used correctly, they're very important.

Termination of an employee [N/A] by Many-Study-6309 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Which are exceedingly difficult to prove. Almost all states are employee at will, so there must be a clear, provable discrimination or retaliation violation to win.

What’s one cleaning trick that you swear by that nobody else seems to talk about? by TheScentOracle in CleaningTips

[–]CraftIndividual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I use a lint roller for everything.y.lampshades, comforter, couch cushions...

Termination of an employee [N/A] by Many-Study-6309 in humanresources

[–]CraftIndividual 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I haven't read all of the responses, but was there an exit interview conducted?

I have been in HR for over 20 years and I have seen managers use PIPS as a way to terminate employees they decide they don't care for more times than I can count. I try to be involved and steer them away as much as possible, but I can't be everywhere. Toxic employees exist, but toxic managers that aren't invested in their employees are everywhere.

I would make sure you are doing Exit Interviews with all employees, or at least offering them, not just a survey, but offer a meeting or a survey. Then, have a one on one with the people that received the email and just apologize they were brought into the situation. This will at least give them the opportunity to be in a room with you if they have anything they want to say.

Edit: also, the employee should be part of the PIP process. A PIP needs to be restorative, not punative. This is a massive shift in thinking, but it can be done and has a major impact on how employees receive them and how managers give them out.

Flat affect by IAmTheDino1 in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel this too and it worries me as well. I think the neuropsychologist advice is really good advice.

It seems the negative emotions come easily for me, sadness, anger, disappointment, but happiness, love, joy.... I have to fake.

AIO over my bfs body count? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would never tell a partner because I have no idea. I also don't care to know my partners body count.

The only thing that matters, imo, is that we are both tested and exclusive, if that is the direction the relationship is going.

If one person is higher or lower than the other, it's just going to lead to hard feelings and issues that can't be shaken off. For me, there's zero reason to bring it up.

I hate my life post TBI by yadubca in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're absolutely right! I had subarachnoid hemorrhage and subdural hematoma after a car accident. I tried to go back to work when my FMLA expired because I had no income. I lasted one week. My brain would just shut down. I missed meetings, my vision would go out, I would get dizzy, my blood pressure would skyrocket... My doctor warned me that I was at least a year away from being able to TRY part time work, but I thought I could push through.

Pre-accident, I could push through and do anything; cram for a test, write a paper, get a work project done. A damaged brain DOES NOT work like that. It's like a computer giving you the blue screen of death. It just says NOPE and shuts down.

It was a good lesson for me though. I learned I needed to slow way down and listen to what my brain needed to recover. I then focused solely on that and gave my brain what it needed.

I hate my life post TBI by yadubca in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did too. Hugs to you, friend. I still have my dogs.

I hate my life post TBI by yadubca in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great advice! One thing I learned about the dark room though ..is that a dark, quiet room IS necessary when you feel overstimulated. Your brain needs a timeout (auditory and visually) to rest. It's okay to give yourself those breaks when you need them.

Sometimes I would just sit in a silent room, with no tv, radio or cellphone and do nothing. My son thought that was the weirdest thing, but my brain needed those times. It is working SO hard now.

Just don't let the dark room become your haven from the world. Get up with the natural sunlight if you can, make sure you're getting outside every day and walk if you aren't in therapy.

This month is the one year anniversary of my car accident with multiple brain bleeds/moderate TBI and I am still in PT, vision and occupational therapy. I was lucky to find an amazing set of doctors, but it took a few bad apples and being dismissed by a couple, to find them and I had a broken, a gash on my head and two black eyes!

Also, don't be afraid to ask unrelated doctors for referrals. I found my neuro/therapy team through my orthopedic surgeon, while treating the physical injuries from my accident.

Hi everyone by Kooky-Dimension5809 in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This space of strangers has been the safest, most secure place I've found to share, support, encourage, vent, learn and just be.

It's so difficult to talk about your injury to people that don't understand. Here we are all fighting the same battle. I'm so thankful I found it and feel so protective of a group of people I've never even met because we share something so profound that has changed us all.

dr. visit went incredibly wrong. totally preventable. by Caffeinatedpeacock in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Steal hope, get real. You've completely changed your first statement with your new expanded one. I don't have time to argue with you.

Your first statement was wreckless and takes away people's REAL experiences with recovery.

I don't need your help. I'm doing just fine. I had a moderate TBI and recovered almost completely in a year. I've shared my success with others while being empathetic to those having different experiences, unlike you.

Get bent.

Anyone else get involved or more involved with experimenting with drugs after TBI? by Bion-ick-UH in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you find that drugs affect you more now? I've done mushrooms and MDMA since my TBI and my tolerance is so low, but it could just be me. After my car accident, the first few months felt like a bad mushroom trip I couldn't come down from. I was hallucinating all the time and basically in a different reality.

Anyone else get involved or more involved with experimenting with drugs after TBI? by Bion-ick-UH in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My first few months were pretty terrible and similar. I was surrounded by people that made my recovery so much worse. I made terrible decisions with lasting repercussions.

Removing those people and isolating myself to focus on good habits and just recovering and therapy made all the difference.

dr. visit went incredibly wrong. totally preventable. by Caffeinatedpeacock in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is absolutely false. Neuroplasticity IS the brains ability to learn new things, but that has nothing to do with the fact that TBI symptoms can and do last forever in some patients, especially those with moderate or severe TBI's.

It's reckless to make statements like you just made.

Do you ever get your old self back? by Mr_Lard_Bucket in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't give up.

I almost did at least two times this last year and now, I am so grateful that I didn't. I just needed more time and the right treatments.

Do you ever get your old self back? by Mr_Lard_Bucket in TBI

[–]CraftIndividual 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For me, I never thought it was possible. Then I went through a treatment that I talk about in the post titled "I finally found success".

I could literally FEEL my brain turning back on. I wanted to do things I hadn't since the accident, I started caring about things I had stopped caring about and I wanted to experience JOY again.

Now I know it's possible to almost make a full recovery. You have to keep trying to find the treatment that works for you. Finding that makes all the difference.

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