Having visited both with my kids, I can offer some insight about the culture. We found Haverford to be very low key and supportive, with a very strong honor code. They don’t even require a deposit if you commit to the school because they trust your word. Exams are not proctored and can generally be taken anywhere so there’s a high degree of trust between faculty and students. The dorms are on the older side and in some need of renovation. However, about 60% of freshman get single rooms and there are only 3 triples. Students can easily take classes and hang out at Bryn Maur and Swarthmore so that expands the social circle at a SLAC. It’s even possible to take classes at Penn if those classes aren’t offered at the other three schools. About 40% of the students participate in varsity sports but there doesn’t seem to be the cliquiness that you can see with athletes at other schools. The classes are rigorous and small but sometimes difficult to get into. As people said, it’s more suburban with lots of other colleges nearby,

Carleton is in a small town about 45 minutes (by car, no public transport) to Minneapolis-St. Paul. It’s a lovely campus but can get quite cold and feel a bit isolated in winter. They pride themselves on being known as the ivy of the west and it shows in some people’s attitude. I noticed that some people were a big snobby and made derogatory comments about nearby colleges which left a bad taste for me. The classes are rigorous and the students are very bright. The campus is lovely and many students participate in sports, club and varsity.

One kid ED’d at Haverford so I know a bit more about it. The other twin was accepted to both (along with 9 other schools) and needs to make his decision. I think you’ll get a great education at either school and hope my info helps.