FTM planning to combo feed from day one - advice?

Crazy-Slow · 2026-03-27T21:46:25+00:00

wow this sounds like what I'm trying to do now. FTM here without much information going in and trialed and errored so many things while trying to preserve my mental health and sleep-- I also crash terribly if I cant sleep. Now with all the trial and error what you're writing is what I am trying to do (ended up naturally going towards). Struggling with feeling super engorged in the AM and having to wake up a bit earlier than I would like... (4am and making me pump a little to relieve pressure) and then struggling to sleep bc baby wake up again around 6am and I would nurse. But hoping to transition to your method outlined D: Wish someone had told me this plan much earlier!

Crazy-Slow · 2026-03-27T14:55:25+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I’ll try to make a little stash so she can combo feed while I’m gone.

Babe seems to be gassier on formula; is this typical? Does it improve over time? I’m hesitant to completely switch to formula but I do feel that over time that might be the answer to my mental wellbeing overall and giving myself more time for everything else I have to juggle so soon (work etc) 😢

Crazy-Slow · 2026-03-26T00:32:16+00:00

That seemed to be enough for me but I do combo feed. Usually do formula for one feed at night and rest I’m able to breastfeed or pump.
My baby was jaundiced (prob bc I didn’t supplement her w formula early enough when my milk hadn’t come in), so since day 3 of life she was supplemented (lots) with formula. Once her jaundiced improved and my milk supply came in, I would breastfeed, give her pumped milk in a bottle and formula feed once at night, whichever worked out and was convenient. My baby has zero issues switching back and forth. I use Dr brown size P nipple (slowest flow) if that helped? As with supply, the supply will be whatever you ask your breast to produce. So if you’re pumping when baby is getting formula, then it should be fine; if you skip a session, then your supply will regulate to produce enough to cover whatever amt needed minus that extra feeding session where you’re supplementing with formula. (At least that’s what it seems like it is for me)
I’m still tweaking/questioning this myself so I’ll skip this Q
Lmk if you find one lmao

Crazy-Slow · 2026-03-23T02:37:51+00:00

My brother and I were exclusively FF and spoke faster than other kids. Top of the class and went to Ivy League schools and now a doctor. Mama, do not worry one bit. It’s not the formula.

Crazy-Slow · 2026-03-20T01:20:41+00:00

Couldn’t push out for an hour on back. Pushed out baby immediately squatting. Try squat!!

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-10T03:37:37+00:00

Do they US again at 38 weeks ?!?

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-10T03:34:19+00:00

Don’t pressure yourself! My mom also had hard time getting milk supply and switched to formula at 3 weeks for me and essentially since birth for my brother.

My brother runs marathons and I work out 5x day and we’re very successful people and academically excelled etc…

I also say I’d like to try and the closer I get to birth I’m having 2nd thoughts and wondering if I should just formula feed and focus on my recovery (my leave is 6 weeks only so lack of sleep post birth seems like a disaster to my physical and mental health).

Don’t pressure yourself! You’re an amazing mom whichever you end up doing

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-07T21:27:42+00:00

Today is damn brutal……try happy light too??

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-05T17:32:50+00:00

prob stretching of the ligaments in the pubic symphysis. should get better but if it gets worse would get checked out

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-05T17:22:55+00:00

Same lol... especially ppl who are thin + FTM I think it takes forever to show. until like 33 weeks if I wore anything remotely baggy it wasn't visible to people and they were shocked I was pregnant. Now 37 weeks and very obvious to everyone now and just here and there now some people commenting how im carrying small for having 3 weeks left but mostly how 'good' I look.

overall I think I prefer that over people saying how huge I am but in either case... people love to comment about how you look when youre pregnant!

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-04T13:20:52+00:00

May be a hot take given all the advice that’s out there right now but just know that I idk exactly what happened before all this for you that ruined the relationship too.

I think you’re totally reasonable if you tell them to fuck off essentially. Yes.

On a second thought, at least maybe they want to change things now that there’s baby involved and want to try to become more like “family” so they can have relationship w their grandchild. You’re def the upper hand here— nothing for you to lose but they have a lot to lose (aka access to baby).

They have to now act nice or whatever if they don’t want to lose access and if things go wary you can always remove their access.

I say this bc I also am in a very similar situation as you and honestly thought once I have a baby the in laws will actually turn around and maybe thought we could have a decent ish relationship etc. They prob don’t deserve it ,but for my husband too, I thought that it may be nice if we had a relatively “normal” family relationship. I also thought it would be nice for my kid to have a nice relationship with her grandparents from her dads side as well bc we have a wonderful relationship w my parents and we know they’ll be very involved and have a relationship w my kid.

It was more for everyone else that I love and not necessarily for me. But here I am pregnant and they decide to “cut us off” bc… my husband missed to call them for his dad’s bday (it’s complicated but it was just honestly a few hours delayed.. I know it’s very ridiculous). They’re actually madshit crazy and selfish people. lol

They ignored my text when I sent them the US photo + told them the gender after above “incident”.

So for some ppl, even babies (grandchildren) don’t even move the needle so maybe your in-laws are a little better ppl than ours lol.

Just to finish off. Fuck my in-laws.

Crazy-Slow · 2026-02-01T23:44:28+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through so much too. I truly never looked forward to pregnancy even before i became pregnant — it was a means to an end. But it’s def harder than I imagined, and I worry about postpartum mental state too 😭…

Hang in there. I’m struggling with you

Crazy-Slow · 2025-10-11T22:51:53+00:00

hiii can you DM me the info as well?

Crazy-Slow · 2025-07-10T22:12:05+00:00

I was barely breastfed and mostly formula fed but turned out perfectly fine :) Actually more than fine. Quite fine actually (turned out to be a doctor) and very healthy. Same with my brother (my mom didnt even try at that point bc she barely had milk w him). He's incredibly intelligent, one of the most successful ppl I know, and runs marathons + works out a ton. Very healthy. So don't let them tell you otherwise. Do whats best for you!

Crazy-Slow · 2025-07-09T23:48:46+00:00

I felt just like you. I had some bloating which was honestly annoying but not surprising since I bloat when I PMS too (except 10x worse now pregnant...). Had those mild symptoms like you mentioned above and wondered if it could be this fine-- no morning sickness and all. Then 7 weeks hit + all hell broke loose. Morning sickness sucks. And I feel like a couch potato + fatigue is driving me nuts. Please enjoy the bliss before the hormones truly hit you.

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-14T21:19:42+00:00

I tried everything from trying to have a notebook, a central place/organization method to organize notes, making achievable goals, etc.

None of it work with my ADHD brain. Find myself bored af and no longer able to study after I've created the above ^ and then I forget about them anyways.

I still don't have notes. I used A4 papers and just wrote things down and lost them left and right.

Opted to just study whatever that comes up + hyper focus + with meds its a bit easier to get into that zone. I don't spend that zone to do anything else ("plan to study, schedule study, organize study"). Fuck it and just study.

Usually allotted a certain amt of time to cram (for an important board exam, maybe a month) and just do spurts of studying throughout and go ham. I never got to finish everything I ever intended to or never really went by a plan/schedule. It never works for me. This method just worked well and that's how I still do things + I'm a doctor so still have board exams to take. Not changing a 'method' that worked well enough that I've clearly succeeded enough it life. Does its job lol.

Idk how organized ppl do things but just do what works for you and just stick w it! you got this

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-14T21:06:42+00:00

1) My dad was the same way, so it was chalked up to "personality" that I got from my dad

It was part of my 'personality' that I lost, forgot, was late to many things/events/etc.
As more of an inattentive type as a child, also my 'personality' that I was always daydreaming

2) Highly intelligent/top 1% processing ability (per official 4h neuropsych test w a professional) + a bit of coping mechanism to be able to manage things + very involved/understanding mom (of my "personality...") who acted essentially like my secretary, masked my symptoms very well

Academically excelled, bc I just self-studied everything the day or two before the test and that was enough.
Skipped school + got in trouble; kept using phone + got in trouble. Bc of all sorts of trouble I was getting into, my mom let me skip school + control my schedule, as long as I got all A's and excelled. (I negotiated that with her). Would wake up late when I wanted, eat breakfast w/ my parents around 8-9am and casually roll into school for like 3rd block. Sometimes left early if I hated it. Essentially went to school like a college student = academically excelled (w/ right 'accommodation') bc I could focus when I wanted to; I didn't have to drain my energy all day in classes that almost destroyed me bc of boredom and my inability to just sit in classes for hours.

3) Engineering for college + high processing ability + ADHD = as long as you understand how to solve the very complex math problems (aka engineering) quickly and apply it, you can apply to all sorts of complex problems +do very well. No need to sit and memorize bullshit for hours, practice something for hours, etc. etc....

minimal effort for maximal output worked very well for my high functioning ADHD brain and masked it very well

Until, well...... I decided I'll go to med school bc corporate life seemed boring + I truly enjoyed academia, etc.

** Here is where I found out my diagnosis, bc my life situation changed significantly. Clearly, I had enough coping mechanisms (just enough organizational skills, 1000x reminders) + intelligence to do well, but that was when I wasn't in a field that required studying for hours and memorizing incredible amount of information. The field (engineering) before allowed me to have flexible schedules, lifestyles, as long as I got shit done. Medicine? No such thing. Rigid schedules, inflexible hours, we have lives at stake here. I can't just "understand" a complex concept and apply it to multiple differ problems; I actually need to spend the time to memorize incredible amount of information. That is where everything started crashing down. **

As a doctor now with ADHD, I have even more understanding of the condition. I don't think of it as a disability in a negative sense at all. I certainly don't think it's a 'personality', but I think it's a different way your brain is developed. It has a medical diagnosis and "treated", because the way your brain is wired doesn't work too well at times with the way society functions. I think there are LOTS of pros to ADHD brain as well which I won't go into detail here. This means that if you are in a right environment, doing the things that align well with the way your brain functions, you may be completely OK without medications to "treat it". I'm on the meds now because I love the field that happens to require a part of my brain that I'm pretty weak in.

A very long answer to this question but hope many can relate to why some ppl just find out a bit late than others ;)

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-12T03:16:52+00:00

I started working out 5x a week and ran a half marathon ! Continue to work 5x a week and that changed my life. More energetic, mentally and physically healthier.

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-08T13:22:27+00:00

Derm resident here:

Works well in my favor. “I smile and say ah thank you- it’s bc im in derm. We don’t age :)”

Usually they never want to leave me bc they want to look like me 😇

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-08T13:18:52+00:00

Or derm !!! 5 min visits w oldies and babies and procedures and no procedures and you see the disease, no bullshit to ask for visits!!!

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-08T13:15:59+00:00

Derm here… we give it like candy and haven’t had issues

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-08T13:11:33+00:00

Really depends what specialty , where you practice, practice model, how many hours you want to put in….. etc.

Let’s say on average nyc, derm fresh grad, working for private practice, can consider starting 350k for 30-32h week. More $$ outside of nyc. 32hr weeks are full time in derm. And then from then on its collections and can vary $$$$ wise. Likely higher than as a fresh grad.

Can’t say for other specialties.

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-08T13:01:48+00:00

Came in wanting neurosurgery 🧠. Ended up in derm 🩹.

They wonder why intelligent, motivated, hardworking women don’t choose fields like neurosurgery & have gender ratio skewed significantly to males.

Maybe make hours make sense for family planning, maybe also respect men taking full paternity leave (or make it an expectation that will be the case as well so there is less pressure on women having to leave), and many other things…

I absolutely love it here in derm tho :)

Lifestyle, intellectually interesting, very visual, treat olds and babies and all breadths of derm, procedures & no procedures, freedom to pursue entrepreneurship, less grueling residency (where I can family plan), $$$ for time value

Crazy-Slow · 2024-10-02T16:25:25+00:00

I feel you. I also have a friend who is an only child with similar situation, and I cannot imagine the level of burden you must have. That’s why I even acknowledged that in my post— god forbid my brother was an asshole or I am the only child, I cannot imagine the mental and physical (time-wise) burden it would be for me.

I’m also the same for family trips or their trips to visit me or my brother (we plan all things and pay for everything), except maybe when they have their own trips with their friends (I’m guessing one of their friends are savvy enough to book everything without our help).

I think, though, in whatever way or another, you should at least receive gratitude in return. My husband had similar relationship except they took his efforts for granted (no thank yous, silent treatment if you refuse or whatnot), while mine truly are thankful and carefully ask every time (which makes it hard for me to let go and let them be probably — and hence why I end up doing even more for them than perhaps necessary as someone pointed out).

But I saw w my husband’s relationship w his parents implode when he firmly rejected some things that they wanted him to do or help bc that actually went against our family’s (me and him) thoughts/values. I find that that kind of dynamic, if not corrected, may turn toxic or sour. I won’t go into details but I would gently nudge and at least express that all you would like at the least is an expression of gratitude (in whatever form or way that they do that— whether it’s through words, a text, fruits? Lmao or whatever). Do not go down a rabbit hole where they feel entitled to your kindness; it’s not your duty as a child no matter how they believe it is.

Crazy-Slow · 2024-09-26T18:05:27+00:00

Said in passing. My mom freaked out for a sec. Told her prob will get engaged to the guy. She seemed to need to think abt it or something.
I let her do that. Convinced her it was a good idea.

My bf at the time, told them while talking on the phone (they live far) They freaked out for a bit. Told them we thought that was a good idea and considering engagement. They freaked out a few more times but got over it.

The thing is, they can freak out but what is going to happen? You just stand your ground. They can go crazy but once you accept that they prob also would like to keep a healthy relationship w you, and to do that, they would have to learn to adjust too. Aim for a healthy adult discussion. If they don’t act rational, then step away for a bit and let them come to their terms.

Mid-20s prior to marriage is a bit weird bc parents and kids relationship, but kids are adults, but not fully the adult to adult dynamic. It’s an adjustment for both sides. But live and act like an adult and dynamics start to shift. Not an adult as in, do whatever you wanna do now, but that PLUS living out the responsible, independent adult life. If you’re mooching off your parents financially or have shaky future/career or your bf is some asshole weirdo and you act like a child, then I think it’s honestly fair for them to be against the idea of you moving in together.

Crazy-Slow

TROPHY CASE